Accidentally in Love
by By the Sounding Sea
Summary: A story describing my version of Leonard and Penny planning their wedding, meeting families, and everything else that goes with it.
1. Chapter 1

**This is something I whipped up while totally stuck on the original novel I'm currently working on. Quick disclaimer: I am not at all on top of _The Big Bang Theory_. I've just been watching it lately when it's on, have really taken a liking to it, and had this idea. So, throughout this story, if there's some detail or something that's inaccurate, forgive me. This is a figment of my imagination. Enjoy!**

* * *

><p>As Leonard walked up the many flights of the stairs to get to his fourth floor apartment, he was feeling rather melancholic. His friends were sitting in his shared apartment playing a game of Dungeons and Dragons, but Leonard simply wasn't interested that night. His longing for his neighbor and ex-girlfriend had been practically constant since she had last broken up with him, and was particularly present that night. Instead of joining his friends in the game, he had decided to go for a nighttime walk alone. He knew it seemed self-pitying, but if he couldn't have Penny, that was what he wanted: solitude.<p>

When he finally reached the fourth floor, Leonard was about to enter his apartment when he heard giggling behind him. He turned around and saw Penny standing next to a muscular man who had about a foot on Leonard, trying to enter her apartment.

"Hey-Hey, Penny," Leonard nervously greeted her. Penny and the man turned to face him.

"Oh, hey, Leonard!" Penny said.

"Who-Who's your friend?" Leonard asked, cursing the world as he felt himself slinking into his shy, awkward persona that so often came out around Penny.

"Oh, this is, um…Jason?"

"Justin," the man corrected her.

"Right, Justin!" Penny said. For a moment, Leonard thought—and hoped—that Penny was drunk, but he knew her well and knew that she was sober enough that she should know his name. He had an inkling that Penny didn't know this man at all, that she had probably met him at a bar and had taken him back to her apartment for sex.

"Justin, this is my neighbor, Leonard," Penny introduced him. Leonard felt stung. Her neighbor? Not even her friend?

"Nice to meet you, Leonard," Justin said dismissively, clearly having no interest in him. "Come on, Penelope."

"Penny," Leonard told him.

"Does it really matter?" Justin said with a shrug. "Come on, Penny. Let's go have some fun."

"Penny, is-is that what you want?" Leonard asked, taking a few steps closer to the two. As terrified as he was of the large man, he didn't want anything to happen to the girl he still loved with his whole heart.

"I mean—"

"It doesn't really matter what she wants, does it? It's what _I _want," Justin interrupted Penny. "Got a problem with that?"

"As a matter of fact, I-I do," Leonard said, trying to sound brave, but failing miserably. Justin took a few steps towards Leonard. He towered over him so much, he casted a shadow over Leonard.

"What are you gonna about it, shorty?" Justin asked. As he spoke, Leonard could smell the alcohol on his breath and knew he was much more intoxicated than Penny was. "What do you weigh, ninety pounds? You really want to take me on?"

"I-I don't want any trouble. I just want what's best for Penny," Leonard told him, trying to sound assertive.

"Leonard, let it go," Penny said. Leonard looked at her and saw the anxiety on her face.

"I'm not going to let him have sex with you when he's like this," Leonard told her.

"Again, what are you gonna do about it?" Justin asked. Leonard paused for a moment, thinking about the best course of action. He tried to make a run for Penny to grab her and bring her to safety, but Justin put one hand against his chest and effectively stopped him.

"You really think you can get past me?" Justin said with a laugh. "Please. You look like scrawny science geek."

"Justin, don't be mean to him," Penny said, but she was ignored.

"Like I said, I don't want any trouble. I just want you to leave me and her alone," Leonard said, trying to keep the fear out of his voice.

"You really are annoying, science geek. I bet you've never had a girlfriend in your life," Justin said.

"Justin, stop," Penny said firmly, not wanting Leonard to be ridiculed.

"Seriously, what kind of girl would want to date a nerd like you?" Justin continued.

"That girl, that's who!" Leonard blurted out as he pointed at Penny. Justin turned to Penny, looking for confirmation. When she nodded, he burst out laughing.

"_You_ dated _him_?" he asked. "Alright, you _must_ have lost a bet or something! A girl like you would _never_ go out with a guy like him!"

"Well, she did! So maybe she's not who you think she is, and I'm not who you think I am!" Leonard yelled at him. "I know you, Justin. I know your type. I've had guys like you bully me throughout my entire life. But I'm a grown man now. I'm not going to let you push me around, and I am _definitely_ not going to let you do anything to Penny. Get out of our building _now_."

"You know, I've got a better idea." Before Leonard had a chance to react, Justin thrust his fist into Leonard's nose. He dropped to the ground, clutching his nose as he moaned in pain.

"Oh, my God! Leonard!" Penny cried as she ran over and got down on her knees beside him.

"Forget him, Penny. Let's go have sex," Justin said.

"Fuck you! Get out of here before I call the cops!" Penny yelled at him.

"You wouldn't do that," Justin said as he rolled his eyes. Penny grabbed her phone from her purse, dialed the three digits, then held it up.

"All I have to do is press 'call.' And I _will_ do it! Get the hell out of here and never talk to me again!"

"You're not as hot as I thought you were," Justin snapped before he stormed down the stairs. Penny began to devote all of her attention to Leonard.

"Leonard? Oh, God. Oh, you're really bleeding," she said as she examined his nose.

"I'll be fine," Leonard said, not wanting to look like any more of a weakling than he thought he already had.

"Are you sure? Maybe I should take you to the hospital," Penny suggested.

"Believe me, Penny, I've had more than my fair share of nosebleeds inflicted upon me over the years. I'll be fine," Leonard assured her. "Maybe you could help me into your apartment, get me some tissues?"

"Yeah, of course." Penny helped Leonard up, then walked him into her apartment and onto the couch. She grabbed a handful of tissues from the box on the coffee table and tended to his bleeding nose.

"I can do it. Like I said, I've had a lot of nosebleeds," Leonard said as he gently pushed Penny away and took matters into his own hands. Within a few minutes, he had managed to stop the bleeding.

"That's pretty impressive," Penny said, giving him a sad smile.

"I had to learn to take care of myself pretty fast," Leonard explained.

"Because people were inflicting wounds upon you?" Penny asked sympathetically.

"Yeah, well…It shouldn't be a surprise to you that I was bullied growing up, right?" Leonard said with a forced chuckle.

"A little bit," Penny said. "You're such a nice guy. I would never have been able to pick on such a sweet person."

"Well…not everyone has your heart," Leonard told her. "But anyway…"

"Yeah," Penny said, realizing he didn't want to talk about his childhood anymore.

"Penny, can I ask you something?" Leonard asked.

"Anything."

"Did…Did you lose a bet?"

"Huh?"

"Is that why you started dating me? Because you lost a bet?"

"No! Oh, Leonard, of course not! Why would you think that?" Penny wondered.

"Because Justin was right about one thing. All of my past experience confirms that girls like you do not date guys like me," Leonard said.

"No, Justin was wrong," Penny told him. "First of all, what is a 'girl like me'?"

"You know. Drop-dead gorgeous, smart, funny. And then you have me, a scrawny, five-five physicist. In most situations, that combination is like mixing permanganates and alcohols," Leonard pointed out.

"Is mixing permanganates and alcohols bad?" Penny asked.

"A solid oxidizer mixed with combustible materials will result in a major explosion," Leonard replied, regretting opening his mouth.

"Why does that have to be a bad thing?" Penny wondered.

"Why does an explosion have to be a bad thing?" Leonard repeated, his eyebrows raised.

"Too literal, sweetie," Penny told him. "An explosion in reality is a bad thing. But a theoretical explosion doesn't have to be a bad thing, right?"

"I don't understand," Leonard told her.

"Oh, honey. Your head is so stuck in science," Penny said, patting his hand sympathetically. "Maybe in science, explosions are bad. But in my book, when a certain kind of explosion happens between two people, it's a wonderful thing."

"Okay, for once, you're the one not making sense," Leonard said. "What do you mean, a good theoretical explosion?"

"Okay, forget I said that," Penny told him. "All I meant was, there can be a certain kind of passion between two people that is so powerful, it's equal to the force of an explosion. Sometimes it's bad, like when two people are fighting. But sometimes it's really good, like love."

"An explosion of love?"

"Yes, Leonard. An explosion of love."

"Well, okay," Leonard said after a moment. "I'm still not sure I understand your point."

"I haven't gotten to that yet," Penny told him. "My point is, while it's usually bad to mix a pomegranate and alcohol—"

"Permanganates and alcohol," Leonard corrected her.

"Sometimes, when that pomegranate and wine get together—"

"This is not scientifically accurate. Alcohol does not mean wine," Leonard said.

"Shut up, dummy, it's called a metaphor!" Penny snapped, then regained her calm composure. "There are occasions when a pomegranate and wine get together, and it becomes that beautiful kind of explosion, the kind that has passion and love."

"Am I wine or am I a pomegranate in this metaphor?" Leonard wondered, his brows knitted together as he was deep in thought.

"Oh, my God. For a genius, you can be really stupid," Penny said.

"I'm just trying to follow your convoluted logic."

"Who said this was logical?" Penny asked. "It's not logical. It's not logical at all. That's the point. It doesn't make sense, and it shouldn't work. So maybe…" Penny exhaled. "I don't know. Maybe that's why I separated the pomegranate and the wine. Maybe I was afraid their differences would come together and make the bad kind of explosion. But now…I'm starting to realize that, no, it doesn't make sense, and it shouldn't work. But it does. It _does_, Leonard. It defies all of the laws of science, but it _still works_." Penny sighed. "The wine made a huge mistake."

"So I am the pomegranate?" Leonard asked. Penny thumped his forehead. "Ow!"

"Did you understand anything I just said?" Penny questioned.

"Yeah. I think I finally got it," Leonard said after a moment.

Penny nodded. "I think I finally did, too."

"We are _so _wrong for each other," Leonard said. "We are so wrong for each other, it inexplicably has the inverse reaction and makes us so right for each other."

"Leonard?"

"Mmm-hmm?"

"Shut up and kiss me," Penny said before she pulled the rather stunned Leonard towards her and planted her lips upon his. It took him a moment, but Leonard quickly began to kiss her back.

"Penny?" Leonard said quietly as they pulled apart after a minute.

"Yeah?"

"I, um…" Leonard began to dig in his back pocket.

"Did that kiss give you an asthma attack?" Penny asked.

"No," Leonard said, rolling his eyes as he grabbed his wallet.

"What, are you gonna pay me for that?" Penny asked, confused. Leonard searched through his cash until he found it: a diamond ring with a white gold band.

"Oh, my God," Penny breathed. "Oh, my God. Where did you get a ring?"

"I…I've been carrying it around for a few years," Leonard admitted.

"That is the sweetest thing I've ever heard!" Penny squealed. "Okay, sorry, I'm ruining this."

"No, just making it more difficult," Leonard told her. "Penny…I've never met another girl like you, and I'll never come across anyone who could begin to compare. So, while you're available, I would like to take the opportunity to ask you to marry me."

"Oh. That was so awkwardly sweet," Penny said.

"What-What does that mean?" Leonard asked nervously.

"It means yes, my crazy pomegranate," Penny told him. Leonard smiled, then slipped the ring on Penny's finger. She admired it. "Gosh, you have surprisingly good taste."

"Thanks, I think," Leonard said. "So…Are we engaged?"

"Yes, Leonard, we're engaged," Penny told him before she directed her eyes back towards the ring. "Wow. Where did you get that?"

"It-It really doesn't matter, does it?"

"Oh, God. Did you get it from a pawn shop? Is it even real?"

"No, I did not go to a pawn shop," Leonard assured her.

"Oh. Good. That's where my dad got my mom's, and I think it's tacky as hell," Penny told him. "Really, where did you get it?"

"Um, that depends if you like it or not," Leonard told her.

"Honey, I've said that I love it, like, ten times. Where'd you get it?"

"It…I don't know if you'll think this is weird."

"Oh, sweetie, there is nothing you could do to make me think that you're weirder than I already believe you are," Penny said, earning a small scowl from Leonard. "Come on. I'm dying of curiosity."

"My…My grandmother died five years ago, and she left me her ring. She said she wanted me to find a nice girl, and, as she said, she knew it would be difficult for me, so she wanted to give me luck," Leonard began to explain. "I knew I wanted to marry you the second I laid eyes on you, so…I've been carrying it around ever since we went on our first date, waiting for the right moment. Is that weird?"

"No, it's not weird! I think that's even better than Tiffany's!" Penny enthused.

"Really? You don't think it's creepy that I've been carrying a ring around in my wallet waiting to propose to you?"

"For anyone else, it would be a little creepy, but for you…It's just your clumsy, yet somehow endearing way of saying how important I am to you," Penny said, making Leonard smile. She smiled back, then leaned in and kissed him.

Leonard felt elated. Somehow, by getting punched in the nose by a would-be sex partner, Penny had realized that she wanted to be with him. He didn't understand why or how she gotten there, and he didn't care.

She was his again.


	2. Chapter 2

Leonard awoke the next morning wondering where he was. After he slipped on his glasses and started to become more conscious, he realized that he was lying in Penny's bed, right beside its owner. He smiled when he remembered everything that had happened the night before. But that smile quickly disappeared when he heard the knock they had all become so familiar with.

"Penny." Knock, knock, knock. "Penny." Knock, knock, knock. "Penny."

"What's that?" Penny mumbled as she began to wake up herself.

"It's the only person who _must_ knock on your door and say your name three times when he stops by," Leonard muttered. "Want me to deal with him?"

"No, we'll both go," Penny said as she rolled out of bed wearing only a camisole and short shorts. Leonard followed her out to the living room, stopping behind the couch as she opened the door.

"What is it, Sheldon?" she asked the tall man standing before her.

"I am searching for Leonard. He did not return last night and—Oh, there he is," Sheldon said as he shoved past Penny and walked into the apartment.

"Oh, please, come in," Penny said sarcastically as she closed the door behind him.

"Good morning, Sheldon," Leonard greeted his roommate dully.

"May I assume based on Penny's dress that you are here because you two engaged in coitus last night?"

"Okay, I can't handle him without the assistance of either wine or coffee," Penny said.

"Go with the coffee," Leonard told her. Penny nodded and headed for the coffee machine in her kitchen.

"Not that it's any of your business, Sheldon, but we did _not_ 'engage in coitus' last night," Leonard told his roommate.

"We did engage in another way," Penny said, earning a smile from Leonard.

"Did you engage in the act of kissing?" Sheldon asked.

"Yes, but that's not what I'm talking about," Penny said as she poured coffee into a mug.

"I don't understand. What else can you engage in?" Sheldon wondered.

"Marriage," Penny said while she stood next to Leonard. Sheldon only blinked.

"Wow. I think this is the first time anyone has ever rendered Sheldon Cooper speechless. Congratulations, Penny," Leonard said.

"Well, you helped a bit," Penny replied with a smile.

"Leonard, are you and Penny engaged to be married?" Sheldon asked.

"That's what she said," Leonard said. Sheldon stared at the couple for a few more moments, then turned around and left.

"That was weird," Leonard said as he went to get his own cup of coffee.

"Do you think he's okay?" Penny asked him.

"Why wouldn't he be?"

"Well, he once told me that he's a big fan of homeostasis. If I know what that means now, us getting engaged kind of ruins that," Penny said.

"Well, he can evolve and develop a new status of homeostasis," Leonard told her.

"I don't know if Sheldon is capable of evolving," Penny said. "Go talk to him."

"Why?" Leonard whined.

"Because you are his best friend, and our getting engaged is going to be an adjustment for him, too. Go explain to him that just because you're getting married doesn't mean that you care for him any less," Penny instructed.

"He is not my child, Penny. I didn't do anything wrong. Why do I have to explain myself to him?"

"He may not be your child, but he might as well be. Go talk to him," Penny said. Leonard groaned, but went across the hall to his apartment. Sheldon was sitting in his spot on the couch.

"Sheldon, are you okay?" Leonard asked as he sat beside him.

"That's a ridiculous question. Why wouldn't I be okay?"

"Because, you know, my getting engaged, that's not going to only affect me. It's going to affect you, too."

"How will it affect me?" Sheldon asked.

"Well, at some point, I'm going to be moving out of the apartment with you and moving in with Penny. That's a major change."

"Why would you do that?" Sheldon questioned.

"Because she's my fiancée. People usually live in the same place as their fiancée," Leonard told him as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Just because people _usually_ do something doesn't mean that _you_ have to do the same," Sheldon replied.

"Are you kidding me? What about when we get married? Are you saying I shouldn't live with my wife?"

"Why would you want to live with Penny when you could live with me?" Sheldon asked.

"Trust me, you don't want me to get into _that_ ever-growing list," Leonard told him. "Listen, Sheldon, I know you're a little upset by this, even if you won't admit it."

"Who's going to be my roommate?" Sheldon asked after a moment.

"Well, maybe we can ask Raj if he would be interested, and if he isn't, I'll help you find someone," Leonard promised.

"But…"

"But what, Sheldon?" Leonard asked, sick of him constantly objecting to everything.

"But they won't be you," Sheldon told him. When Leonard saw what appeared to be sadness in Sheldon's eyes, he started to feel bad for him.

"Sheldon…That's nice of you to say, but—"

"Why was it nice? All I said was that a new roommate would not be you," Sheldon said.

"You were telling me that you would miss me if I left," Leonard said, his forehead wrinkled in confusion.

"I never said that. I said a new roommate would not be you," Sheldon said. "It took the longest time to train you to be a proper roommate. It would be a nightmare to restart the process."

"Great. Thanks for the sentiment," Leonard said, his voice oozing with sarcasm.

"You're welcome," Sheldon replied, not detecting it.

"I don't care what you say, Sheldon. If I moved out, you would miss me," Leonard declared.

"No, I wouldn't," Sheldon protested.

"Yes, you would."

"No, I wouldn't."

"Who would drive you around town? Who would make you food? Who would _always_ get your convoluted Chinese order right?" Leonard questioned. Sheldon was quiet for a minute, then directed his gaze down towards the couch.

"Maybe I would miss you," he mumbled.

"I know you would," Leonard said, starting to feel bad for him. "Penny and I will be right across the hall, at least for awhile. We won't be far away."

"Will you still drive me to work?" Sheldon asked.

"Yes."

"Will you still come over and eat Chinese food?"

"Yes."

"Will you still make me breakfast?"

"That we'll have to discuss," Leonard told him. "Things are going to change, Sheldon. Things are going to change a lot, for all three of us. It's going to be hard, and you're going to hate it. But you'll get through it. You'll adjust."

"If I don't, will you move back in?" Sheldon asked.

"No, I won't," Leonard said bluntly. "You'll be alright, Sheldon. I promise."

"When will you move out?" Sheldon asked.

"I don't know. I guess as soon as Penny's donated enough of her clothing to create a few inches of space in her closet for me," Leonard replied.

"I simply can't understand how two people can be so disorganized. You are perfect for each other," Sheldon told him.

"Well, thank you," Leonard said, knowing there wasn't anything else to say. "So you're okay?"

"Of course I'm okay."

"Okay. So can I go back over to Penny's?"

"Since when have you asked for my permission to do anything?" Sheldon questioned.

"Good point. See you later." Leonard got up from the couch and went back across the hall to Penny's apartment.

"How'd it go?" she asked from the couch as she muted the television.

"He'll be fine. It won't be easy, but he'll be fine," Leonard told Penny as he sat down beside her. "His biggest concern was really about his future breakfast plans and retraining another roommate."

"That's _all_ he said?" Penny asked a bit skeptically.

"Well…He kind of mentioned that he _might_ miss me," Leonard admitted.

"He's a sweet guy," Penny said. "I mean, he can be annoying as hell and doesn't care at all about social appropriateness. But a sweet guy nonetheless."

"When he wants to be," Leonard said.

"Oh, come on. I know you're not a tough guy, Leonard," Penny said.

"What's that supposed to mean? I'm a tough guy," Leonard said defensively.

"You're not fooling anyone, sweetie," Penny said. Leonard frowned. "I just meant that you're a softie deep down. You're going to miss him, too."

"Why would I miss him when I'll be living with you?"

"You are going to miss him," Penny said with a knowing smile.

"Fine, I…I _might_ miss his insanity just a _little_ bit," Leonard finally admitted.

"That's all I wanted to hear," Penny said. "Alright. Let's get down to business. We have much to discuss."

"Let's do it," Leonard said with a smile, excited to plan the ceremony that would change his life.


	3. Chapter 3

Penny and Leonard spent a few hours discussing the basics for the wedding. After they had discussed—but not come to a conclusion to—a date for the ceremony, Penny realized something.

"What's up?" Leonard asked when he noticed the look on her face.

"I haven't told my family yet," Penny said.

"And?"

"_And_, if my mother knew that I didn't tell her the second after you proposed, she would kill me," Penny said as she jumped up to get her cell phone from the kitchen counter. Once she retrieved it, she rejoined Leonard on the couch.

"What's your mom's name?" Leonard asked as Penny dialed the number.

"Mary," Penny told him as she turned on the speaker, then set her phone on the coffee table. After a few rings, a woman answered.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Mom, it's Penny," Penny told her.

"Oh, Penny! You haven't called in months!" Mary said giddily. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"Well, I was actually calling with some pretty great news," Penny said.

"And what's that?" Mary asked, the excitement evident in her voice.

"I'm engaged, Mom!" Penny said happily.

"Oh, Lord. When's the baby due?" Mary said with a sigh. Leonard chuckled at her response, earning a slap on the arm from his fiancée.

"No, Mom, I'm not pregnant," Penny told her.

"This isn't another pregnancy scare?" Mary asked.

"No, Mom," Penny said with an exasperated sigh.

"Are you sure? Because I've gotten this call from you before and—"

"No, this is _not_ a pregnancy scare! This is…" Penny looked at Leonard and smiled.

"It's what, dear?" Mary asked.

"This is love," Penny said, keeping eyes on her fiancé. Leonard smiled back.

"Alright, Penny. I believe you and I am very happy for you. What's his name?" Mary asked.

"His name is Leonard Hofstadter."

"Leonard Hofstadter?" Mary repeated, her tone suggesting that Penny had told her Leonard's name resembled that of an alien.

"That's right."

"Is there anything you can do about that?" Mary asked.

"No, Mother. That's his name and it's staying that way," Penny said, rolling her eyes.

"Alright, alright, if you say so," Mary said. "So tell me, what does this Leonard Hofstadter do?"

"He's a physicist at a university," Penny told her, causing a long pause. "He's a scientist, Mom."

"Oh! He has a job, too?!" Mary asked excitedly. "My goodness, Penny dear, this boy is sounding better and better! Wrap him up and put a bow on him!"

"Will do," Penny said, starting to appear annoyed.

"Is he from Pasadena, or is he a nice Midwestern boy?" Mary wondered.

"Neither, actually. He's from New Jersey," Penny told her.

"He doesn't have one of those accents like I see on the TV, does he?"

"No. No, he doesn't. Enough questions, alright?"

"Just one more," Mary said. "When can your father and your sister and I fly to California to meet Leonard?"

"Oh. Do you really want to do that?" Penny asked nervously.

"Of course we want to do that! When I tell your daddy that his little girl is engaged, oh, he is going to be so excited!"

"He wasn't the last time," Penny said. "Seriously, Mom, be careful about what you say to him. The last time, he wanted to kill the guy."

"Oh, that's only because he thought that he knocked you up, honey. If you're not pregnant, I'm sure he'll be happy for you."

"It's nice to know that he has high standards for me," Penny said sarcastically.

"You're really not going to let me tell him?…Oh, it's Penny!"

"Who are you talking to, Mom?" Penny asked.

"Your dad just got home. He wants to talk to you," Mary said. "I'm not bringing the phone to you! If you want it, Wyatt, then you come get it!" A few moments after the screaming ended, a male's gruff voice came through the phone.

"Penny?" he said.

"Yeah, Dad, it's me," Penny said, putting her head in her hands. Leonard tapped her shoulder until she looked up, then mouthed the words, "What's wrong?".

"Your mother says you have something to tell me," Wyatt said before Penny could respond.

"Yeah, I do," Penny said, trying to sound enthusiastic. "Uh, Dad…I'm engaged."

"Engaged to do what?" Wyatt asked after a moment.

"To be married, Dad, engaged to be married."

"Damn it, Penny! What kind of daughter did I raise if you don't know to tell a boy to use a damn rubber?!" Wyatt exclaimed, making Leonard cover his mouth to conceal his laughter.

"Shut it, you!" Penny hissed at him before she turned her attention back to her father. "Dad, why do you assume that the only reason I'm engaged is because I'm pregnant?"

"Because I've seen you in this movie before, Penny Rose, and frankly, I'd rather not buy another ticket," Wyatt told her.

"Oh, my God. One time! I call you guys with a pregnancy scare _one time_, and now it is completely impossible that I can get married without having a bun in the oven?!" Penny yelled. "If you're not going to be happy for me and actually believe that I'm getting married for love and not to be made a decent woman, then just forget about it!"

"Not marrying me, right?" Leonard asked anxiously.

"Who was that?" Wyatt asked.

"My fiancé, Dad, that's who! The man I love and who loves me!" Penny exclaimed. "I'm getting married no matter what you guys think, so if you're not going to be supportive, then just don't come!"

"Hold on, Penny, hold on," Wyatt said before Penny could hang up. "I'm sorry, alright? I shouldn't have assumed that. I'm very happy for you, okay?"

"Really?" Penny asked, softening a bit.

"You're my little girl, Penny Rose. Of course I'm happy for you," Wyatt said. "This'll be my first time giving a daughter away."

"Except when Katie Anne got married two years ago," Penny said slowly.

"Well, Katie Anne shot her husband, so your mother and I like to pretend that that marriage never happened," Wyatt said. "When's the big day?"

"We don't know yet. It just happened last night," Penny told him.

"Well, before you make any plans, I'm going to need to meet this man who didn't even have the courtesy to ask for my blessing."

"Is that a real thing?" Leonard whispered to Penny, his eyes wide.

"Dad, it was really sudden. He didn't—"

"Once I talk to him, I'll tell you if I can overlook what I _hope_ was just an innocent mistake," Wyatt said, interrupting Penny. "Your mother and I will be in California on Friday."

"Friday? Dad, that's two days from now!" Penny exclaimed.

"So what? We can stay at the motel, easy-peasy. I'll have your mother book us a plane ticket. You don't even have to pick us up at the airport. We'll take a cab."

"Dad, seriously—"

"Penny Rose, I don't know what to say. If you want to get married, I need to meet this man. What's his name, anyway?" Wyatt asked.

"Leonard Hofstadter," Penny said with a sigh as she realized that there was no way she would be getting out of her parents' visit.

"Hmm. That's unfortunate," Wyatt said. Penny mouthed "sorry" to Leonard when she saw his offended expression.

"Okay, Dad, I've gotta go," Penny said, eager to end the conversation.

"Hold on! I still have questions about this boy you want to marry!"

"Well, you can ask them all when you come to town. I have to go now."

"What's more important than talking to your father?" Wyatt questioned.

"I'm sorry, but I'm about to lose you because I'm driving through a tunnel, in a canyon, on an airplane, while hanging up the phone." Penny pressed the red "end call" button before her father could get another word out.

"Wow. They're, uh…" Leonard said, struggling to come up with the right thing to say.

"Obnoxious? Stupid?" Penny suggested.

"I was going to say, they come on strong."

"Well, that's one word for it," Penny muttered.

"Why did they keep assuming that you were pregnant?" Leonard wondered.

"Well, a few years ago, I was dating this guy. A few weeks after we first did it, I missed my period, so I took a pregnancy test. It ended up being a false positive, but I didn't know that until I took a blood test at the doctor two more weeks later. By then, I had already told the boyfriend, and he had proposed because he felt like a deadbeat, and I had told my parents, and it was a huge mess."

"So you've been engaged before?" Leonard asked.

"Well, _technically_, yes, but we were only engaged for a week. The second I found out that I wasn't really pregnant, I broke it off," Penny explained.

"Did this all happen after I met you?" Leonard asked. Penny didn't respond. "Penny?"

"It started two weeks after I broke up with you," she admitted.

"Oh," Leonard said, a bit taken aback. "So…So two weeks after you dumped me—"

"Oh, 'dumped' is such a harsh word," Penny said, feeling terrible for having ended their relationship.

"Well, that's what it was, but it doesn't matter anymore," Leonard said. "Two weeks after you dumped me, you did it with some guy you barely knew, and you thought you were pregnant?"

"It wasn't some guy I barely knew," Penny said hesitantly.

"Do I know him?" Leonard asked. Penny nodded. "Who-Who was it?" Penny wouldn't answer him. "Oh, God. Please say it wasn't Howard."

"No, it wasn't Howard. It was worse than that," Penny told him. "It…It was Zack."

"Zack? Like, 'Are You Going to Blow Up The Moon With Lasers' Zack?" Leonard asked, his eyes so wide, they were stretching above the frames of his glasses. Penny nodded, biting her lip. "Wow. That is worse than that."

"I know," Penny said. "Can you imagine if I had had Zack's kid?"

"That kid would have been in the special class, that's for sure," Leonard said.

"I know!" Penny groaned. "Wanna know the worst part?"

"What?"

"He proposed to me with a Ring Pop," Penny confessed. Leonard couldn't keep himself from laughing. "Stop laughing!"

"I'm sorry! I can't help it!" Leonard said. After a few moments, Penny broke down and laughed, too.

"Thank God I don't have to worry about dating someone as stupid as he was anymore," Penny said once their laughter began to quiet. "Although, I never imagined I would ever date, let alone marry, a genius scientist."

"Why did you think that?" Leonard wondered.

Penny shrugged. "I dunno. I guess I just always thought that a genius scientist wouldn't want to date someone at my intelligence."

"Why not? You're one of the smartest girls I know," Leonard said.

"Oh, please. You know Amy and Bernadette and all of the girls at work, and you're trying to tell me that I'm one of the smartest girls you know?" Penny asked doubtfully.

"Penny, I don't care that you don't have a doctorate. You're still an incredibly intelligent woman," Leonard assured her. "I like being able to teach you things. I think it's cute when I say something scientific and you think that it's something else, like permanganate and pomegranate. I actually really like that you're not a scientific genius."

"Really?" Penny asked. Leonard nodded vigorously. "That's really nice of you to say. Because sometimes, hanging around you and Sheldon and Raj and Howard and Amy and Bernadette…Sometimes I feel really stupid."

"You shouldn't. You're perfect," Leonard told her. Penny smiled, then leaned in and kissed him.

"Thanks, Leonard," Penny said when they separated.

"No problem," Leonard replied. Penny smiled when saw the pink tinge around his face the kiss had caused. "What's the matter?"

"Nothing. You're just cute," Penny told him. "Hey, what about your family?"

"What about them?" Leonard asked.

"Don't you want to call and let them know that you're getting married?"

"Not particularly."

"Why not?" Penny asked. "I know you think that I'm smart, but I also know that you come from a family of scientists. Are you afraid you'll feel ashamed of me when they see that you're just blinded by love and realize my true intelligence level?"

"You're not stupid, Penny, and I would never feel ashamed of you," Leonard said. "I don't want to tell them because they would just find a way to ruin my happiness."

"What do you mean?"

"My mom, the psychiatrist, would try to ascertain my exact feelings regarding becoming engaged, because it simply _can't_ be pure happiness. My dad, the anthropologist, would interrogate then criticize us for all of our pedestrian choices about the ceremony, _then _encourage us to add in marriage rituals from ancient cultures. My younger brother, the Harvard law professor, would give us—mostly you—a full lecture on how marriage will greatly inhibit your personal and legal freedoms. And my older sister, the medical researcher trying to find a cure for diabetes, would question all of our dietary choices. They're not exactly a fun crowd to chat with."

"Wow. I didn't even know that you had siblings," Penny said.

"Yeah, we don't have much of a relationship with each other," Leonard said before he turned his head away and began to fiddle with his hoodie string.

"Why not?"

"Well, you're not wrong when you say that they'll have to find out at some point. I'll let them speak for themselves," Leonard told her. "For now, though, you wanna just sit back and watch some TV?"

"That's the smartest thing that's ever come out of your mouth. My parents totally wore me out," Penny told Leonard. She grabbed the remote and turned the TV back on. She flipped the channel to TLC, where _Say Yes to the Dress_ was playing.

"Oh, this is appropriate," Penny said as she began to examine all of the wedding dresses the brides were trying on. Leonard sat back and let Penny's flying comments about each dress become background noise, while he dreaded talking to his family and wondered if he would be beaten to a pulp when he finally met his future father-in-law.


	4. Chapter 4

After Penny and Leonard's lazy day spent calling her parents and looking at wedding dresses on TV, they decided the next day would be the best to get all of their friends together and announce the news of their engagement. Leonard called Raj and Howard, and Penny called Amy and Bernadette, telling all of them to meet at Penny's apartment in half an hour. Bernadette was the first to arrive, the other four quickly following him. Penny sat them down in her living room and stood in front of them with Howard.

"What's going on, Penny?" Bernadette asked.

"Well, we called you all over here because we wanted to share some news with you," Penny began. "Two nights ago, Leonard proposed. We're engaged." Their announcement was followed by a long, blank stare from their friends. Finally, Howard spoke up.

"What the hell took you so long?" he asked the couple. The rest of the group laughed. "Seriously, Leonard, you've been head over heels for Penny for years, and you're just _now_ proposing? Where have your balls been?"

"Yeah, yeah," Leonard said, rolling his eyes.

"Oh, he's just messing with you. This is fantastic! Congratulations, you two," Bernadette told them.

"There is the matter of who you will chose as your maid of honor. Naturally, I think it would be fair to assume that it will be me," Amy declared.

"I-I really haven't thought about that, Amy," Penny said, hoping to avoid what she knew was going to be an inevitable conflict.

"Hey, where's Sheldon?" Howard asked.

"We told him yesterday," Leonard explained.

"Was he upset? Because I didn't hear from him yesterday, and he didn't show up at work," Howard informed him.

"Oh, gosh. Do you think he's upset?" Penny wondered.

"I don't know," Leonard said, starting to feel a bit concerned.

"Why don't you go invite him over, go see how he's doing?" Penny suggested.

"Alright. I'll be right back," Leonard said before he left Penny's apartment, crossed the hall, and entered what was, for then, his. Sheldon was sitting on the couch with his computer open in his lap.

"Hey, what are you doing? I texted you to come over to Penny's," Leonard said.

"I'm calculating the probability of you returning to the apartment," Sheldon told him.

"You're _what_?" Leonard asked as he stepped closer to him.

"It's really very simple math. Considering the number of times Penny has ended your relationship before, along with the number of times you two have had relations without being in a romantic relationship only to have Penny reject you again, I have determined that there is fifty-three-point-five percent chance that your engagement will not last and you will end up living in the apartment again."

"Wow. It's great to know you have so much confidence in our relationship," Leonard said, a bit irritated that Sheldon was trying to predict that the engagement would fail.

"I think you misunderstood my previous statement. I don't have much confidence in your relationship at all," Sheldon said.

"Sheldon, you consider me to be your best friend, right?" Leonard asked.

"Well, considering—"

"No, not considering. For once in your life, don't think, just feel. Do you consider me to be your best friend, yes or no?"

"I suppose so, yes," Sheldon replied.

"Alright. Then you need to understand that a good best friend would not hope that their friend's fiancée will break up with them."

"I'm not hoping Penny will break up with you. I used numerical data to calculate the likelihood that she will," Sheldon said. "Hate the statistics, Leonard, not the statistician."

"Sheldon," Leonard with a sigh. "I knew this was going to be difficult for you, but—"

"It hasn't been difficult for me, Leonard. You should never jump to conclusions."

"Oh, yeah? If it hasn't been difficult, then why haven't you talking to Howard or Raj since we told you?"

"They're both fools. Wolowitz doesn't even have a doctorate. Why would I want to talk to them?"

"Why didn't you go to work?" Leonard asked.

"Because you weren't here to drive me," Sheldon told him. "Nothing you've just offered is evidence that I'm struggling with your engagement to Penny."

"I don't need evidence." Leonard sat down on the couch beside him. "Listen, Sheldon. I've known you for a long time, and knowing you for a long time has convinced me of something that a lot of people don't believe."

"What would that be?" Sheldon asked.

"That as cold and calculating as you can be, there is a part of you that's more…well, human," Leonard said. "You care about me. Even if you don't know it, I do."

"If you were hit by a truck, I suppose I would be upset," Sheldon said after a moment of consideration. "However, I would only be upset if you were hit by a truck while crossing the street at the appropriate time. If you were walking when you shouldn't have or were driving a car, I would have little sympathy."

"Yeah, okay," Leonard said after a moment, choosing not to comment on the convoluted scenario only his roommate could completely understand. "I think you're missing the point here, Sheldon."

"What's the point?"

"The point is, it's okay to be sad about me moving out, and it's also okay to express that to people," Leonard told him.

"For heaven's sake, Leonard, don't think so highly of yourself," Sheldon said. "I won't miss you. I've never missed anyone before in my life."

"Like I said, even if _you_ don't know it, I do. I also know that you'll eventually realize it. When it finally really sinks in, you can come talk to me. Would you like to come over and celebrate with everyone?"

"No," Sheldon said simply.

"Your choice. I'll see you later." Leonard stood up and headed out. When he had his hand on the doorknob, Sheldon stopped him.

"Oh, Leonard. I forgot something," he said. Leonard sighed, but turned around.

"What would that be?" he asked. Sheldon held up a thick stack of paper. "What the hell is that?"

"I'm surprised you're not familiar with it at this point. This, Leonard, is our roommate agreement."

"Oh, Lord, please no," Leonard said to himself. "Which part of the roommate agreement would you like to refer to now?"

"Section three, part four. In the case of a romantic relationship developing between the roommate, i.e. you, and another subject, the roommate must submit a formal, written notice of the intention to vacate his living quarters a minimum of five weeks before departing," Sheldon read from the document that had somehow become the supreme law of the land.

"Are you freaking kidding me?" Leonard asked.

"I don't kid, Leonard," Sheldon replied.

"You're really going to make me give you a written letter and then wait five weeks before I can move in with Penny?" Leonard said incredulously.

"Well, had you not initialed there, I wouldn't, but there's really no arguing with the roommate agreement," Sheldon told him. "I do believe I have a better solution, though."

"Do you?" Leonard asked skeptically.

"Yes. You and Penny have a desire to reside with each other. I don't understand why that means you must move into Penny's apartment. Why don't you have Penny move in here? That way, everyone is happy."

"I don't think everyone would be happy, because after a few weeks, Penny will have killed you in your sleep," Leonard said. "Penny is not moving in here, Sheldon. I'm moving in with her."

"But that leaves me unhappy. With my solution, everyone wins."

"Like I said, everyone would _not_ win because you would be dead and Penny would be in prison, making two of us miserable," Leonard pointed out.

"Only two?"

"You can't be miserable if you're dead."

"Fair point," Sheldon agreed. "Alright, Leonard. In your written notice, I would appreciate you formulating your own solution to this conundrum where everyone is satisfied, free from prison, and alive."

"No," Leonard said after a few moments of thought.

"Excuse me?" Sheldon asked, truly taken aback. "Leonard, you cannot argue with the roommate agreement."

"I have let that stupid thing dictate how I've lived for way too long. I'm not going to let it determine when I'm going to start living with my fiancée," Leonard said firmly.

"But…You initialed in the designated space!" Sheldon exclaimed.

"I don't care, Sheldon. You can consider this my notice." Leonard turned around, opened the door, then headed back across the hall. When he opened the door to Penny's apartment, he saw his fiancée and friends sitting and laughing with glasses of wine in their hands.

"How'd it go?" Penny asked Leonard as he closed the door.

"I feel bad for him, yet I'm pretty pissed at him," he told her.

"He is he upset?" Bernadette asked.

"It's Sheldon. I have no idea if he's upset," Leonard said. "All I know is that he's sitting there calculating the likelihood that you're going to break up with me and is trying to keep me there for five weeks, as stated in the roommate agreement."

"Why would he think I'm going to break up with you?" Penny wondered.

"Because you've rejected and broken up with me so many times before, he's certain that this won't last," Leonard told her.

"You don't think that, right?" Penny asked anxiously.

"No, of course I don't think that," Leonard said. "He wants you to move in with us so I won't have to leave."

"That's actually kind of sweet," Bernadette commented.

"It is kind of sweet, but I also can't let him determine how Penny and I live our lives," Leonard said.

"Don't worry, Leonard. I'll conduct a thorough battery of tests on Sheldon to determine if he is neurologically sound," Amy said.

"That's a…sweet offer, but I don't think he needs that," Leonard said. "I think he just needs time to adjust."

"Alright, enough about Sheldon. He'll get over it," Howard said. "We shouldn't be sitting in Penny's apartment. We should be out celebrating!"

"Wanna go to that bar across the street from the Cheesecake Factory?" Penny suggested.

"Whatever the bride wants! Come on! If we get Raj drunk enough, maybe we can get him to tell you congratulations," Howard said as he led the group out of the apartment. Just when Penny and Leonard were going to start descending the stairs, Amy stopped them.

"If Bernadette gives you any trouble about me being your maid of honor, just say the word. I'll handle it," she said before she followed the others. Penny looked at Leonard, shaking her head.

"What are we getting ourselves into?"


	5. Chapter 5

The next day, Penny was preparing her apartment for her parents' arrival later in the afternoon. While she was picking some dirty clothes off of the living room floor, she asked Leonard the question he had not been looking forward to.

"So have you talked to your family yet?"

Leonard sighed as he put down the book he had been reading. "No, I haven't."

"Okay, I don't care what you say. I'm starting to feel like you're ashamed of me," Penny told him.

"I swear, I'm not," Leonard insisted.

"I don't believe you. I don't even have a community college degree, and you have to tell your family of doctors, lawyers, and scientists that you're marrying me. If I were you, I'd be embarrassed, too."

"Penny, I am _not_ embarrassed of you," Leonard assured her.

"Prove it," Penny said.

"What?"

"Prove you're not embarrassed of me."

"How do you want me to do that?"

"By calling your parents and telling them that you're marrying me," Penny instructed. "If you don't do it right now, I'll be a little offended."

"Penny—"

"Leonard, you cannot get married without telling your family. Do it _now_," Penny demanded.

"So this is what married bliss is going to look like," Leonard said under his breath as he dug his phone out of his pocket and dialed his mother's number. He turned the speakerphone on as Penny had while it was ringing.

"Dr. Beverly Hofstadter," she said upon answering.

"Hey, Mom. It's Leonard," Leonard announced.

"I know it's you, Leonard. I have caller identification," Beverly stated emotionlessly.

"Then you could have answered the phone as if you were going to talk to your son, not like you were going to talk to an executioner," Leonard told her.

"Thus far, Leonard, the only thing your call has accomplished is wasting my time. What do you want?" Beverly asked.

"Well, Mom, I wanted to let you know that a few nights ago, I got engaged," Leonard said, trying to inject some excitement into his mother.

"Oh. Then I suppose congratulations are in order," she said, her voice completely dull.

"You suppose? Are you not happy for me?"

"I suppose I am unenthused because I have already received this call," Beverly said.

"What are you talking about? I've never been engaged before."

"But Samantha became engaged two years ago, and Michael called me a month ago to tell me that he is now engaged."

"What? Michael's engaged?" Leonard asked, truly shocked.

"Yes, he is. Her name is Eleanor Lyons, and she is the youngest appellate court judge in New Jersey history. She is a highly accomplished young woman," Beverly informed him.

"Why didn't you tell me this?" Leonard wondered.

"The information didn't pertain to you."

"Didn't pertain to me? My brother is engaged, Mom. That information pertains to me!"

"There really is no reason to discuss this. You have the information now," Beverly said. "Tell me about this woman you want to marry. I assume she is a scientist, as well."

"Um, not exactly. She's a waitress and aspiring actress," Leonard told her.

"What kind of education does she have?" Beverly asked.

"Well…She graduated high school."

"And where did she attend college?"

"She, uh…She completed half an AA degree at Omaha Community College," Leonard offered. There was a long pause. "Mom?"

"Leonard?"

"Yeah?"

"Why are you engaged to an idiot?"

"God, Mom!" Leonard exclaimed as he quickly grabbed his phone to turn off the speaker. Unfortunately, his clumsiness reared his ugly head. It fell out of his hands and crashed to the floor. He scrambled to grab it, then got up to go to the bedroom, but Penny stopped him.

"I want to hear this," she told him.

"No, you don't. You really, _really _don't," Leonard assured her.

"I don't give a damn what your mother thinks. I want to hear what _you_ have to say. Talk to her," Penny said. Leonard sighed, but put the phone up to his ear.

"Leonard? What happened?" Beverly asked.

"Sorry, I dropped my phone," Leonard explained.

"Oh. Well, back to the topic at hand. Why are you marrying a woman who has no education?"

"Why does her education matter?" Leonard asked. "Just because she don't have a degree doesn't mean she's not an extremely intelligent person."

"A woman with half of a community college degree is not extremely intelligent."

"Mom—"

"Leonard, despite the fact that you are the most unsuccessful of your siblings, you still deserve better than her," Beverly said.

"First of all, I am not the least successful of my siblings! I am a very successful scientist, and I don't want to hear you say that I'm not again!" Leonard exclaimed. He had never had the confidence to stand up to his mother before, but now that she was insulting Penny, he was angry enough to say anything. "And I don't want to hear you judge or insult my fiancée again, either. You don't know her. How could you be so bold to say that she's stupid when you don't even know her name?!"

"Leonard, why are you so angry?" Beverly asked.

"Why am I angry?! Because you're insulting me and you're insulting the woman I love, that's why!" Leonard yelled at her. "I'm not going to let you walk all over me anymore. I have Penny now. I have someone who loves me and actually _shows it _when you never did."

"I gave you plenty of affection, Leonard," Beverly said.

"Really? I built a hugging machine to get affection when I was a kid. You think that says you gave me plenty?"

"I gave you the appropriate amount to make sure you weren't dependent on me," Beverly said. "This isn't about me, Leonard. This is about you marrying an uneducated woman."

"A degree does not make intelligence. It makes knowledge, but it does not make intelligence," Leonard told her.

"I don't understand the difference."

"I know you don't." Without saying goodbye, Leonard took the phone away from his ear and hung up.

"Wow," Penny said.

"This is why I didn't want to tell her. I knew she would just ridicule you _and _me," Leonard told her.

"I've gotta tell you, Leonard, that whole thing there where you finally stood up to your mom?"

"Yeah?"

"It was kind of hot," Penny said.

"Really?" Leonard asked.

Penny nodded. "I don't see you get assertive very often, at least not successfully. Girls like that in a guy."

"Really?" Leonard said, this time smiling a bit.

"Really." Penny leaned in and kissed him. "Thanks for standing up for me."

"Of course," Leonard said. "I don't care what my mother says. Just because you didn't go to college doesn't mean you're not smart."

"I…I'm open to going back to school," Penny told him. "I've…I've really been thinking about it a lot. And now that we're engaged…I don't know. I feel like a lot of people are going to think, you know, 'How'd she'd get him?'"

"You honestly think people are going to ask how _you _got _me_?" Leonard asked, his eyebrows raised.

"Well, yeah."

"Penny…Have you looked at me and looked at you? People are going to be asking how _I _got _you_."

"That's all superficial," Penny said. "If people find out that a man with a PhD in physics married a girl who only has a high school diploma, they'll think it's weird."

"I don't care what people think, and neither should you," Leonard said. "I'm obviously not going to discourage you from going back to school. It would be a great thing for you. But I only want you to do it if you want to do it for yourself, not so people won't look at you funny."

"I just…I don't want people to judge me," Penny said softly, sounding more vulnerable than Leonard had ever heard her.

"_Screw_ who's judging you," Leonard said firmly. "All that matters is what I think of you and what you think of yourself. And I think you're brilliant."

"You are the sweetest man in the world. But I just can't make myself believe that," Penny said. "I want to get a degree, Leonard, even if it's just community college. For us and myself."

"As long as it's at least partially for yourself, I think you should do it. Whether you want to go to a traditional college or a community college, I'll help you." He gave her a kiss. "You go back to school, and you show my mom that you are _incredibly_ smart."

"I think I'm gonna do it. But if I have to take a math class, you have to promise to help me."

"I promise," Leonard said with a laugh. "Come on. We have to go get your parents at the airport."

"I'm dreading it," Penny groaned.

"Hey, better than meeting mine. Let's get going. I'll drive." Leonard grabbed his car keys from the coffee table and headed out. Penny followed him, wondering if she was trying to make too many changes at once.


	6. Chapter 6

"Why are you so nervous?"

"You'd be nervous, too, if you were about to see your crazy parents."

"Fair point," Leonard admitted. He and Penny were standing in the baggage claim area to meet her parents.

"That's them," Penny said, nodding towards an aging couple walking towards them. The woman was short and plump, while the man was at least six feet tall. A wide grin grew on Mary's face when she saw Penny.

"There's my girl!" she said happily as she threw her arms around Penny. "Oh, I feel like I haven't seen you in ages, dear!"

"It's good to see you, too, Mom," Penny said a bit insincerely as she tried to distance herself a little.

"Is this him?" Wyatt asked, pointing at Leonard.

"Yes, it is," Penny said. "Mom, Dad, this is my fiancé, Leonard. Leonard, these are my parents, Mary and Wyatt Johnson."

"It's a pleasure to meet you, sir, ma'am," Leonard said as she shook each of their hands, trying to make a good first impression.

"What a gentleman!" Mary said happily. "Penny, I can already tell that this is the best man you've ever dated!"

"Leonard, I would like to sit down with you and have a talk. Could you do that?" Wyatt asked.

"Oh, uh, sure. No problem. Would-Would you like to have lunch tomorrow, or—"

"I think I'd rather sit you down this evening and chat," Wyatt told him.

"Whatever you'd like, Mr. Johnson," Leonard said.

"Good. Penny, why don't you take your mother out to dinner while Leonard and I get to know each other a little better?" Wyatt suggested.

"I don't know, Dad. Maybe I should be there," Penny said skeptically.

"I need to talk to him man-to-man to make sure he's fit for you, Penny Rose. You go out and show your mother Los Angeles," Wyatt said in a tone that told everyone what he said would go.

"Oh, can we go see those stars on the street?" Mary asked with an excited gleam in her eyes.

"I guess so," Penny said with a small sigh.

"I got us a rental car. Why don't you take your mother out to dinner, and Leonard and I will find a place to chat," Wyatt said.

"Leonard, will you be okay?" Penny asked her fiancé.

"Of course. Go have fun with your mom," Leonard told her, though in reality, he was feeling very nervous as he wondered what kind of questions his future father-in-law would ask.

"Alright. Mom and I will take the bags and see you guys later." Penny kissed Leonard's cheek before she and Mary headed for the luggage carousel.

"Come on, Leonard. Let's get the car," Wyatt said as he led the way to the rental car area. When he was handed the keys, Wyatt walked with Leonard to the car lot until he found the one assigned to him.

"Would you like me to drive?" Leonard offered.

"I know how to drive a car," Wyatt told him.

"Oh, I-I know you do. I was just saying, you know, since I live here and I know my way around town—"

"You can give me directions. I'm driving," Wyatt said definitively as he got behind the wheel.

"This is gonna be a _long_ night," Leonard said to himself as he circled the car and got in the passenger's side.

"So where would you like to go to talk?" Leonard asked.

"Where's the best sports bar?" Wyatt asked.

"Sports bar…" Leonard repeated as he tried to think of one. "Uh, I could find one on my phone."

"Man oughtta know where the best sports bar is," Wyatt said with a small sigh. Leonard's anxiety started to rise, feeling like he was blowing it before it even began.

"You know, I think my friend did tell me about a bar," Leonard said, remembering Howard mentioning his favorite bar to pick up women before he married Bernadette. "I'll tell you where to go."

Leonard managed to direct Wyatt to the bar. They got out of the car, walked inside, and sat down at the wooden countertop, where the bartender was serving drinks left and right.

"Um, can I get you a bottle of wine or a beer?" Leonard offered.

"What is this, breakfast?" Wyatt replied.

"Oh. Well, what would you like?" Leonard asked.

"Two Jack Daniel's, straight!" Wyatt called to the bartender. He gave him a thumbs up, then started to make their drinks.

"Jack Daniel's is whiskey, right?" Leonard asked.

"Son, do you not know anything about alcohol?" Wyatt wondered.

"I'm not…the biggest drinker," Leonard admitted.

"Here you are, fellas," the bartender said as he placed the two drinks in front of them.

"Drink that," Wyatt commanded Leonard as he picked up his glass and knocked back the liquor. A bit apprehensive, but not wanting to disappoint his future father-in-law, Leonard picked up the drink and took a small sip. He nearly gagged, but managed to choke it down without making too much of a face.

"So, Leonard Hofstadter," Wyatt began.

"Yes, sir."

"I'd like to get to know the man that my daughter wants to marry," Wyatt said. "Why don't you tell me what you do for a living?"

"I'm an experimental physicist at the California Institute of Technology," Leonard told him.

"Is that a science thing?"

"Yes, sir."

"Hmm," Wyatt said.

"Is that a good 'hmm' or a bad 'hmm'?" Leonard wondered.

"It's an 'I'm interested' 'hmm,'" Wyatt said enigmatically. "How long have you been doing that?"

"Since I got my doctorate ten years ago."

"Doctorate, huh?"

"Yes, sir."

"Hmm," Wyatt said again. "You've obviously gone to college. Where'd you go?"

"I actually went to Princeton."

"Ivy League, right?" Wyatt asked. Leonard nodded. "Hmm."

"You are very fond of that expression," Leonard observed.

"I'm just wondering what drew my daughter to you," Wyatt said.

"You wouldn't think Penny would be attracted to me?" Leonard asked.

"Not exactly. You're just not the kind of guy I've always seen her with, for which I am very grateful," Wyatt said. "Penny's always dated go-nowhere deadbeats. I don't know why she started dating an Ivy League scientist, but I'm glad she did."

"You had me nervous there," Leonard told him.

"Don't worry so much, Leonard. I just want to get to know you more," Wyatt said.

"Whatever you want to know," Leonard told him.

"I don't know. What's your favorite team?" Wyatt asked.

"My favorite team?" Leonard repeated. Wyatt nodded. "Like sports team?"

"Can you even think of one?"

"Sure. There's the, uh, Lions up in Chicago."

"I think you mean the Cubs," Wyatt said.

"Oh. Yeah, maybe," Leonard said as he felt his cheeks flush.

"Leonard, I don't want you to pretend to be someone you're not. I want you to be honest with me," Wyatt said.

"I…I don't want to lie to you, Mr. Johnson. I just want you to like me," Leonard said so quietly, it was difficult for Wyatt to hear him over the din in the bar.

"Why do you want me to like you?" he asked Leonard.

"Because…Because I love your daughter, Mr. Johnson. I love her more than I can say, and I want to marry her more than I've ever wanted anything," Leonard said.

"Why do you want to marry her? Why do you love her?"

"Because she's smart, and she's hilarious, and she's beautiful. And because she loves me," Leonard told him. "I never…When I was growing up, I never really experienced a lot of affection. My parents were obsessed with their jobs and I didn't have any friends. Then I got to college, and all I wanted to focus on was academics because I thought that it was me who had the problem. And then I met Penny. I don't think she knows just how much she's helped me. She taught me that, you know…I am likable and even loveable. Penny is the sweetest person I've ever met, but at the same time, she doesn't take crap from anyone, and I love that. I'm just crazy about your daughter, Mr. Johnson, and I never want to lose her." Penny's father stared at Leonard for a long time. Just when Leonard began to feel nervous that he had said something wrong, he smiled.

"Call me Wyatt," he told him.

"Really?" Leonard asked.

"You're gonna be my son-in-law, aren't you? You better not be calling me Mr. Johnson for the rest of my life," Wyatt said. Leonard couldn't stop himself from smiling, relieved that he had made a good first impression.

"Thank you, Wyatt," Leonard said.

"Sure." Wyatt pointed at Leonard's untouched whiskey. "You gonna finish that?"

"No," Leonard told him.

"Good." Wyatt picked up the glass, knocked back the drink, then slammed it on the table. "What do you say we go back to your apartment building so you can talk to your future mother-in-law and kiss that beautiful bride of yours?"

"That is a great idea." Leonard pulled out his wallet and paid the bill, then followed Wyatt out to the car and gave him directions to the apartment. While Wyatt drove, Leonard thought about the major victory he had just accomplished, and wished he could make it so Penny could feel the same.


	7. Chapter 7

While her mother was in town, Penny thought it would be fun to go shopping for her wedding dress. After the weekend while Leonard was at work, Penny drove to a bridal salon with her mother, eager to get shopping. A few minutes after they entered the shop, Amy and Bernadette walked in together.

"Hi, Penny! Is this your mom?" Bernadette asked when she saw the older woman.

"It is. Mom, these are my friends, Amy and Bernadette. Amy and Bernadette, this is my mom, Mary," Penny told them.

"It's very nice to meet you, Mary," Bernadette said with her cheerful smile.

"You, too, girls," Mary said. A young woman approached them a moment later.

"Hello, ladies," she greeted the group with a big smile. "I'm your consultant, Jill. Which one of you is my bride?"

"That's me. I'm Penny," Penny introduced herself.

"What do you think you're looking for, Penny?" Jill asked.

"I'm not completely sure," Penny told her. "I don't think I want a ballgown, I want something tight. But I love everything on a dress. Lace, beading, jewels, all of it."

"When is the wedding?" Jill asked.

"We don't know yet, so I want to act as if it's in a month, because for all I know, it might be," Penny explained.

"I can look at some sample dresses that are for sale and you can take home today. And do we have a budget?" Jill asked. Penny turned to her mother.

"Don't be grabbing any ten thousand dollar dresses or anything, but within reason, if Penny loves it, I'll get it," Mary told her.

"Alright. Let's start looking. Follow me." Jill led the four women into an elevator up to the second floor, where thousands of dresses lined the walls.

"Holy crap. We could be here for weeks," Penny said when she saw all of the options.

"Don't worry, I'll help you narrow it down," Jill assured her as they turned a corner and found an area with a couch, a wooden pedestal, and several mirrors. "If you ladies would like to sit here, I'm going to take Penny back to the dressing room, and she'll be back in a minute with the first one."

"See you in a minute," Penny said as she followed Jill down another hallway into a dressing room. She handed her a robe hanging up.

"Alright, I'm going to ask you to put that robe on while I am going to go pull a few dresses. I'll be right back." Jill left the dressing room, closing the door behind her. Penny sat for ten minutes after she had changed into the robe until Jill returned carrying two dresses.

"Those are really pretty," Penny said, excited to put them on.

"Then let's get you in one. Which would you like to try first?" Jill asked. Penny pointed to the dress closest to the door. Jill unzipped the plastic bag it was wrapped in, got it out and helped Penny put it on. Once the zipper had been done, Penny observed herself in the mirror.

"Wow," she said as she admired the dress.

"What do you think?" Jill asked.

"It's pretty. Really pretty," Penny said, a bit blown away.

"Do you want to go show your mom and friends?" Jill asked. Penny nodded. "Alright. Let's go." She went behind Penny, picked up the train on her dress, and followed her out to the three ladies.

"Oh, my word," Mary breathed with her hand covering her mouth when she saw Penny walk over to them.

"What do you think?" Penny asked as she stepped onto the pedestal.

"Good gracious, my dear. You look beautiful," Mary said.

"So this is a trumpet-style dress," Jill began to explain. "It has lace all over it, along with some beautiful crystal beading at the neckline."

"It is lovely, but I can't help but notice that there's a hole in the back," Mary observed.

"That's called a keyhole back. It's supposed to be there," Jill assured her.

"I don't know," Penny said. "It's really pretty, but the more I look at it…I think with all the lace and the back and the covered buttons, it's too traditional for me."

"I agree. I think you should wear something a bit more different," Bernadette said.

"No problem. We have plenty of dresses to try. Come with me, Penny." Jill led Penny back to the dressing room.

Penny tried on another dress and showed the ladies, but they all decided that it was too common. After that, she put on a different dress and went back out.

"Oh, my, my, my," Mary said when she saw the dress Penny was wearing.

"So this is called a fit and flare gown," Jill told them. "It has beading all along the side, and then that dramatic ruffled skirt."

"Penny dear…Where are you and Leonard planning on having this wedding?" Mary asked.

"We haven't decided yet, but we were thinking outside somewhere," Penny told her.

"Well, I'm not going to tell you want to do, but I think you know I would rather you have your wedding in a church. And you _cannot_ wear that dress in a church," Mary said firmly.

"Mom, Leonard isn't religious, and I'm not really, either. It's not going to be in a church," Penny said.

"I don't care. That dress is not appropriate for any wedding," Mary said. "It's too tight, and the top is too low-cut."

"It is a little…I don't know…whoreish," Amy said.

"I mean, if you love it—"

"I like it, but I don't like it enough to wear it if you guys think I'm going to look like a whore," Penny said, interrupting Bernadette. "Let's go, Jill."

When they got back to the dressing room, Jill quickly got Penny in another dress. Instead of going out immediately, Penny admired herself in the mirror.

"Do you like this one?" Jill asked.

"I _really_, _really_ like this one," Penny told her. "I don't think my mother will."

"Well, let's go find out," Jill said as they walked back out to show them.

"Oh, my Lord," Mary said when she saw her daughter.

"I _love_ this dress," Penny enthused.

"Well…I wouldn't have chosen it," Mary said.

"So this is a very fitted gown with a deep-V neckline in the front and in the back," Jill told them. "What do you ladies think?"

"It's not something I would wear, but I think it really does look like you, Penny," Amy said.

"It's _exactly_ what I would picture you in on your wedding," Bernadette told her.

"I…I'm not the biggest fan, but if you love it, Penny dear, I'll pay for it," Mary said. "Your friends are right. This is _very _you."

"Yeah. That's what I'm afraid of," Penny said. "I do love this dress, and it's what I imagined myself in, too. But now that I'm looking at would _should_ be the perfect dress…it's not."

"What do you mean?" Bernadette asked.

"I don't want to be predictable," Penny explained. "When I walk down the aisle, I want to shock Leonard."

"I'll admit that I don't know Leonard very well, but I have a feeling that if he saw you wearing this, he would be _very_ shocked," Mary said.

"I think you would make him completely speechless," Bernadette said.

"You would definitely intimidate him," Amy added.

"But I don't want to intimidate him," Penny said. "I know that Leonard is a little awkward, and I don't want to show so much that it would make him so intimidated, he can't say, 'I do.'" She turned to Jill. "Can I try a ballgown on?"

"Absolutely. In fact, I have one in mind I think you would like. Come on back with me," Jill said as she helped Penny off the pedestal. She left her in the dressing room for a few minutes, then came back with big ballgown. It had an elaborate beaded and embroidered bodice, and a big, fluffy skirt. Once she was all zipped up, Penny looked at herself in the mirror.

"Oh, my God," she breathed.

"Do you like this?" Jill asked.

"I definitely want to show them," Penny said. They walked back out to show the three girls.

"Oh, Penny," Mary said breathlessly.

"I hope you guys like this dress, because it's the one," Penny declared.

"It's gorgeous, Penny," Bernadette told her.

"How do you feel in this dress?" Jill asked.

"I feel like something I thought I would never be," Penny said.

"What's that?" Mary asked.

"A bride," Penny told her. " I never thought I would get married. I never thought I was the type. I also never imagined myself in a dress like this. But now that I have this on, and now that I've met Leonard…It all just seems so right."

"It's lovely, Penny," Amy said with a smile.

"Absolutely gorgeous. You should definitely get it," Bernadette agreed.

"Mom?" Penny asked. She turned her neck and saw her mother dabbing her eyes with a tissue.

"I've never seen anything like this, Penny. You look better than you've ever looked before," Mary told her.

"Should I wrap this up for you?" Jill asked.

"Wrap it up, Jill. This dress is mine," Penny said with a wide smile.

"That means you have to take it off," Jill said, smiling back.

"That's unfortunate." Penny stepped off the pedestal. She went back to the dressing room and changed into her clothes, letting Jill take her beloved dress. After waiting for a few minutes with her friends and mother, Jill brought the dress wrapped in a large, black garment bag.

After they purchased the dress, Amy and Bernadette said goodbye so they could go back to work, while Penny drove her mom back to her hotel, then drove herself to the apartment building. When she walked inside, she saw Leonard sitting on the couch with his laptop.

"What are you doing here? I thought you went to work," she said.

"I did, but I decided to come back to work on a research proposal," Leonard explained. "I've been reading about this experiment scientists are possibly going to pursue, and I thought it would be fascinating to try to pursue it myself on a smaller scale. It would attempt to determine if gravity affects antimatter the same way it affects matter by testing its effect on an antihydrogen beam. By sending a stream of antihydrogen through a series of diffraction gratings—"

"Honey, I hate to interrupt you because I can see how happy this makes you, but I have no idea what you're talking about," Penny said gently.

"Right. I'm sorry. I'm just really excited about this," Leonard told her.

"That's so cute," Penny said before she gave Leonard a kiss and walked inside.

"So dress shopping went well?" Leonard asked, pointing at the garment bag Penny had over her shoulder.

"Very, _very_ well, but don't be expecting any peeks. I want it to be a big surprise," Penny said as she hung the dress over the back of the couch. "You and I need to start getting more serious about starting to work out the details for this wedding."

"I'm okay with whatever you want, Penny," Leonard told her.

"Are you sure? I don't want this to be one of those weddings where the bride decides every little detail and doesn't let the groom make a single decision."

"That's not what this is. I'm allowing you to make every single decision."

"Do you not care?" Penny asked.

"No, of course I care. But I know about experimental particle physics. _You_ know about parties," Leonard said, earning a slight glare from Penny. "No, no, I didn't mean that in a bad way. I'm just saying, you know what people like at a party, and I don't. I'm sure it would be a lot more entertaining for the general public if you did most of the planning. But if there's something you want me to do, just say the word. I'll do it."

"I want you to tell me who you want to invite," Penny said as she sat down beside Leonard.

"Raj, Sheldon, and Howard," Leonard said simply.

"That's _it_?" Penny asked. Leonard nodded. "No other friends?"

"I don't really have any other friends."

"No _family_?"

"Not if I can avoid it."

"Leonard…"

"I don't want to invite them not because I'm ashamed of you. I don't want to invite them because all they would do is criticize us," Leonard explained. "Trust me, it wouldn't be any fun for anyone if my family came."

"I want to meet your family, Leonard," Penny said.

"Why? You heard what I've said about them. You've heard what my mother said about you. Why would you want to meet them?"

"Because I want to have the opportunity to show your family that I'm not who they think I am. The only way to do that is to have them meet me," Penny told him.

"Penny, I…" Leonard sighed.

"You what?"

"I just don't want them to hurt you," Leonard said.

"That's sweet. But I don't want you to protect me from my new family. I don't want to hide from them. I want to face them and let them see who their son is really marrying." Penny said. "Which member of the family do you have the best relationship with?"

"My dead uncle," Leonard replied.

"Who is currently breathing," Penny amended.

"I don't know. I guess my sister, but we still aren't close."

"Why don't you call your sister, see what she has to say?" Penny suggested.

"Alright, Penny. For you, I will call my sister tomorrow."

"Thank you." Penny pecked Leonard's cheek. "What do you say you come help me clean out my closet so you can officially move in?"

"That is what I live for," Leonard said. Penny smiled, jumped off the couch, grabbed Leonard's hand, and pulled him back into the bedroom. For the next hour, Penny went through her closet, asking Leonard if he liked each piece of clothing she was willing to part with. But all Leonard could think about was what it would be like to talk to the sister he hadn't seen in years the next day.


	8. Chapter 8

The next day, Leonard left work early again, this time so he could go home and call his sister without Penny around. He was afraid that she would have the same negative reaction that his mother had had, and he didn't want to subject Penny to that again. With Sheldon at work, Leonard sat in the living room with the apartment completely to himself. He got his phone out, took a few deep breaths, then dialed his sister's number.

"Hello?" she answered after a few moments of ringing.

"Sammy?" Leonard said.

"Who is this?"

"Um, the only person in the world who calls you 'Sammy.'"

"Thomas, whose phone are you calling from?"

"No, Samantha, I'm not your husband, I'm your brother," Leonard said.

"Lenny?" Samantha asked after a moment.

"Yeah, it's me," Leonard said, smiling as he thought he heard some happiness in her voice.

"Lenny, we're not twelve years old anymore. Don't call me Sammy," Samantha told him.

"Nice to talk to you again, too," Leonard said, feeling his mood deflate. "And if I can't call you Sammy, you can't call me Lenny."

"Fair enough," Samantha agreed. "We haven't talked in a few years. What made you want to call?"

"Can't I just want to talk to my big sister?"

"I suppose you could, but I don't believe that you do," Samantha said. "Really, why are you calling?"

"Have you talked to Mom recently?" Leonard asked.

"Not in a few months. Why? Is she okay?"

"If she wasn't, I certainly wouldn't be the first to know about it," Leonard said. "She's fine. I talked to her a few days ago."

"Wow. That's even stranger than you calling me," Samantha said. "Even at my wedding two years ago, you barely spoke to each other."

"Well, I tried, but we couldn't have a real conversation because she was too busy telling me that I should enjoy watching your wedding because I would never have my own," Leonard said bitterly.

"Yeah. I remember trying to convince you of the opposite after I found you sitting alone outside. It was kind of awkward when I was wearing a wedding dress," Samantha said sympathetically. "I don't know why Mom has always been so rough on you."

"Neither do I, but…I almost don't care anymore," Leonard said.

"Why not? At the wedding, you said you had been planning the perfect murder for years and were ready to execute it," Samantha pointed out.

"It's still not out of the picture yet, but now I have a reason to keep myself out of prison."

"Besides the fact that you would be shanked the second the guards took off the handcuffs?"

"Yeah, besides that," Leonard said. "I was actually calling to tell you that, um…you were right."

"You'll have to be more specific, Leonard," Samantha said.

"You were right when you said I would have my own wedding," Leonard told her.

"Leonard, are you engaged?" Samantha asked.

"Yeah. I-I know you probably think it's hard to believe, but I actually am."

"It's a little surprising, but it's not exactly hard to believe," Samantha said.

"Why is it surprising?" Leonard wondered.

"Oh, just because when we were kids, every time my friends came over, your face would turn red and you would run to your room without saying anything."

"Just because I might have been a little awkward growing up makes it a surprise that I'm engaged?" Leonard asked.

"I'm just saying, based on past experience, I kind of saw where Mom was coming from."

"Gee, thanks," Leonard said sarcastically.

"I'm sorry, Leonard. I don't want to be mean. Congratulations," Samantha said. "So who's the girl? It is a girl, right?"

"Yes, Samantha, it's a girl," Leonard said, rolling his eyes. "Her name is Penny Johnson."

"That's a cute name. Did you meet her at work?"

"You know, just because _I'm_ a scientist _doesn't_ mean that the woman I marry has to be a scientist," Leonard said, going on defense before the attack came.

"Okay, she's not a scientist. Is she—"

"You're not going to guess what she is," Leonard said.

"Why not?" Samantha wondered.

"Because in your people's mind, she's beneath me. So no, she's not a scientist. She's not a doctor. She's not a lawyer or a professor."

"Jeez, Leonard, calm down. I haven't made any accusations," Samantha said defensively.

"I'm sorry. I just…I don't want you to think that I'm better than Penny just because I have a better education," Leonard explained.

"No matter what she does, as long as she's not a prostitute or a stripper, I won't think less of her. What does Penny do?"

"She's a waitress and aspiring actress," Leonard told his sister. "She barely has any education beyond high school. What do you think of that?"

"It's not what I would have thought you would chose, but as long as she's not some ditzy chick who doesn't know that two plus two equals four, I don't see a problem with it," Samantha said.

"Why would you think I wouldn't want to date someone just because she doesn't have the best education?" Leonard wondered.

"Anyone would think that someone with a doctorate from Princeton would choose someone with a similar background."

"Well, that's wrong," Leonard said. "I don't understand why education matters."

"Because that's how society works, Leonard."

"Well, that's wrong," Leonard said again.

"I can see this is a touchy subject for you," Samantha said. "What did Mom say?"

"She asked me why I'm marrying an idiot," Leonard told her. "She started calling Penny stupid before she even knew her name." He sighed. "I'm finally engaged, and for some reason, I thought she would be happy for me. But because I'm marrying an uneducated person, according to her, I'm wasting my life."

"You're right, Leonard. It's not fair. At the very least, I would want to meet her before I started saying things like that," Samantha said.

"You really don't care?"

"Why should I? If you love her and she loves you, I don't see a problem."

"Samantha, you have no idea how great it is for me to hear that someone in this family approves of Penny," Leonard said with a big sigh of relief. "I just love her so much, and…and it hurts that the people who are supposed to support me are ridiculing me _and_ her."

"Mom is Mom. Just ignore her," Samantha instructed. "You know, I have a lot of stored up vacation days. Maybe I could fly out to California. I could see you, meet your fiancée? What do you think?"

"You'd be willing to take a few days from curing diabetes to come see me and Penny?" Leonard asked, genuinely surprised.

"You're not going to get support from anyone else in this family, probably not even Michael. I would have _hated_ it if everyone had been telling me that Thomas was wrong for me. I'm not going to do that to you," Samantha told him.

"Thank you, Sam. You have no idea how much that means to me," Leonard said. "Hey…Why haven't we talked in two years?"

"I don't know. I always thought you didn't want to talk to me."

"I thought _you_ didn't want to talk to _me_," Leonard said. "I guess one of us should have picked up the phone and figured this out."

"Well, you did," Samantha pointed out.

"Yeah. And all it took was me getting married," Leonard said.

"I think that's a great excuse," Samantha said with a chuckle. "Seriously, Leonard, I'd really like to see you and meet Penny. Could I come to California?"

"I would love for you to come to California, Sam," Leonard said, surprised at the truthfulness of his words.

"Great. I'll work on getting a plane ticket. I'll try to come this weekend," Samantha said. "I have to get back to work, but I'm really looking forward to seeing you and meeting Penny."

"Me, too. I'll see you soon, Sam."

"Bye, Leonard," Samantha said before she ended the call. Leonard sat back against the couch and exhaled, happily surprised at the interaction he had had with his sister.

After a few hours of working from the apartment, Leonard heard someone knock on the door. He got up to open it and saw Penny standing before him.

"Hey, Penny," he said, smiling broadly when he remembered that he would be spending the rest of his life with her.

"Hi, sweetie," Penny said before she kissed him. "Is Sheldon here?"

"Nope, just me."

"Great," Penny said as she walked inside.

"How was your day?" Leonard asked as he closed the door.

"Same old, same old. Did you call your sister?" Penny asked, cutting right to the chase.

"I actually did," Leonard told her.

"And?"

"And, it actually went really well, considering I thought I was going to get the same reaction as I did from my mom," Leonard told her.

"Well, what did she say?" Penny wondered.

"She actually sounded pretty happy for me."

"Did you tell her I'm not a scientist?" Penny asked. Leonard nodded. "And she was still cool with it?"

"In Samantha's words, as long as you're not a prostitute or a stripper, you're great for me," Leonard said.

"She has very high standards for you," Penny said with an amused smile.

"Well, I've always been her nerdy little brother. I think she thought that I would never find a girl who would want to date me," Leonard said.

"Trust me. There are _plenty _of girls who want to date you," Penny said before she kissed Leonard. "Thank you for doing that for me."

"No, I'm glad you made me do it. I hadn't talked to my sister in two years, and now, Sam is coming to California to see me and meet you," Leonard told her.

"Really? That's great!" Penny said with a wide smile. "I can't wait to finally meet someone from your family."

"I hope she lives up to expectations," Leonard said, still feeling a bit apprehensive about the whole situation.

"Now you have to tell your dad and your brother," Penny told him.

"Why do I have to do that? My brother would talk about how inadequate you are compared to his fiancée, and my dad would say the same thing my mom did," Leonard said. "Why don't we see how it goes with my sister, and then talk about telling them?"

"That's fair," Penny agreed. "You know, I've made a lot of progress in my closet. What do you think about starting to officially move into my apartment?"

"Are you sure?" Leonard asked.

"Well, yeah. I mean, you've been spending the night more often than not. Wouldn't it be better to not have to go across the hall to get dressed every morning?"

"You know that I'm dying to move in with you. But I've kind of been wanting to take the process slowly, for Sheldon," Leonard explained. "If I spend the night with you, but leave my clothes here, I can still say that I haven't really moved out."

"I understand that completely, and you know that I want to be sensitive to Sheldon. But I don't want to take this slowly anymore. I want to live with my fiancé," Penny said. "I think it's time for you to sit down with Sheldon and talk about moving out."

"So I have to talk to my sister for the first time in two years _and_ tell Sheldon that I'm moving out in the same weekend?"

"I would like that, and I know you would, too, after you did it," Penny said. "Don't be scared, Leonard."

"What? Scared? I'm not scared of anything," Leonard said.

"Oh, honey, please. When we saw that clown outside the comic book store, you squealed and hid behind a tree."

"First of all, coulrophobia is a very common condition. Secondly, it is not a fear, it is a hatred," Leonard said defensively.

"Yeah, keep telling yourself that, sweetie," Penny said. "_Anyway_, I know it's not going to be nearly as bad as you think it's going to be."

"I hope you're right," Leonard said.

"I'm always right," Penny said with a playful smile.

"Permanganate and pomegranate," Leonard pointed out.

"Okay, if it's not related to physics, I'm always right."

"Technically, that's chemistry…but never mind," Leonard said when he saw Penny's narrowed eyes. After a moment, she smiled and leaned in to kiss him.

"You wanna go back to my apartment and do some, you know…" Penny said, smiling suggestively.

"That-That sounds good to me," Leonard said.

"Oh, good. Because I was going to say do some wedding planning," Penny said, a broad smile emerging on her face when she saw Leonard's surprised expression.

"That's what I thought you were going to say," Leonard said unconvincingly.

"Oh, honey. You are the worst liar," Penny said. "Come on. We have much to discuss."


	9. Chapter 9

A few days later, Penny and Leonard found themselves at the airport for the third time in two weeks, after picking up and dropping off Penny's parents and now picking up Samantha. They stood at the front of the now-familiar baggage claim area, waiting for Leonard's sister to show up.

"There she is," Leonard said nodding towards the tall, blonde woman wearing a white shirt, cream sweater, and black and white printed skirt walking towards them.

"_That's _your sister?" Penny asked.

"Yeah. Why?"

"Just…knowing you, she is…not what I expected," Penny said. Before Leonard had a chance to ask her what she meant, Samantha had reached them with a smile on her face.

"Long time, no see, little brother," she said.

"It's good to see you, too." Leonard and Samantha looked at each other for a moment, unsure of how to react to each other.

"Don't look at me like we've never met," Samantha finally said before she gave Leonard a hug. When she pulled away, she turned to Penny.

"Are you Penny?" she asked.

"Yes, I am," Penny said, showing her beaming smile.

"It's so nice to meet you, Penny. I'm Samantha Pennington, Leonard's older sister."

"Penny Johnson, Leonard's fiancée. It's really nice to meet you, too," Penny said.

"Leonard, my flight just came up. Would you mind grabbing my bag? I'd love to talk to Penny," Samantha requested.

"Oh. Sure. No problem," Leonard said before he went to find his sister's luggage, leaving the women alone.

"What do you say we get rid of my brother and you and I go talk?" Samantha suggested.

"I'd love to," Penny said, but inside, she was starting to realize what Leonard had been feeling when her father wanted to talk with him. The pressure to make a great impression was high, and she couldn't afford to blow it.

"I got it," Leonard said as he rolled a large suitcase towards the girls.

"Thanks so much," Samantha said. "I don't want you to stop working just because I'm here. Why don't you go back to your lab and Penny and I will spend some time together?"

"I'd kinda like to be with you guys," Leonard said, afraid that Samantha would turn on him and use the opportunity to demean Penny.

"It's okay, Leonard. Girl talk can't take place with a boy around," Penny said. "We took two cars so you could meet me from work. You take the bag back to the apartment and go back to finding out how gravity affects antimatter."

"You remembered that?" Leonard asked.

"When I saw how excited you were, I had to do a little Googleing," Penny told him.

"I love it when you do that," Leonard said with a smile. "Are you sure you want me to leave?" Penny nodded. "Alright. We can all have dinner together, I guess."

"Perfect. We'll see you later," Samantha said as she and Penny watch Leonard reluctantly walk away.

"So Samantha, are you hungry? We could get lunch, or just go to a Starbucks or something," Penny suggested.

"Some coffee would be great," Samantha said.

"Great. Let's get going." Penny led the way through the parking lot back to her car, then drove them to the nearest Starbucks. Once they had gone through the line and each had a cup of coffee in their hand, they settled down in the shop.

"So where are you from, Penny?" Samantha asked.

"I grew up in a little town right outside of Omaha," Penny told her. "Are you still living in New Jersey?"

"I am. We grew up in Princeton, but I'm living in a city called Hackensack now," Samantha said.

"And Leonard said you're a diabetes doctor?"

"Not exactly. I'm a medical researcher, so I usually don't treat patients directly. I do research in an attempt to discover a cure for diabetes," Samantha explained.

"That's really cool. Really important," Penny said, wishing she had something she could feel so proud of.

"Thank you. I think it's pretty cool, too," Samantha said. "How did you meet my brother?"

"We've been neighbors for a few years, and after awhile, we connected."

"Just out of curiosity, I assume you pursued him?" Samantha wondered.

"Actually, it was the complete opposite," Penny told her. "I always kind of knew he was interested in me—_really_ interested in me—but for a long time, I ignored it because while I thought he was a really nice guy, I didn't think…This is going to sound horrible, but for awhile, I didn't really think he was my type."

"Yeah, I can see that," Samantha said with a smile. "I'm really surprised that Leonard pursued you. For the longest time, he couldn't even look at a girl without turning red, so the idea of him going after a girl that looks like you is pretty incredible. What made you want to give him a shot?"

"Well…Listen, Leonard can be really insecure about the reason why I started dating him, so you can't tell him this, alright?" Penny said. Samantha nodded. "In complete honesty, I agreed to go out with him because I felt sorry for him."

"You felt sorry for him?" Samantha asked.

Penny nodded. "He wanted to go out with me so badly. So when he asked, I said yes, mostly out of pity. But then we went on our first date. He was so awkward around me, and I actually thought it was cute. It made me feel good that he wanted me to like him so badly. I just ended up thinking that he was sweet and adorable."

"But I think it's pretty safe to say you weren't in the same social group," Samantha said.

"No, we weren't. But I started to realize that I really didn't care. I just wanted him," Penny told her.

"I don't want you to think that I'm criticizing you when I say this, but I can't help but notice—"

"What? That I'm marrying a genius with a PhD in physics when I don't even have a community college degree?" Penny asked.

"Well…yes."

"I hate the fact that I don't have any kind of degree, especially now that I'm marrying Leonard," Penny said. "I know that Leonard thinks he's the only insecure one in this relationship, but ever since we started dating, I've always felt like I'm not smart enough for him, not to mention the problems it's caused with your family. So I've been thinking about it a lot, and I'm going to try to go back to school, or at least take a few science classes so I can talk about work with him without having to look things up in the dictionary."

"Penny, based on what Leonard said to me, he's always going to love you, degree or no degree," Samantha said.

"I know he will because he's the sweetest man in the world. But you saw how he lit up when I mentioned the antimatter thing, whatever the hell _that _means," Penny said. "I know how much he likes talking about physics. When he does, his eyes light up and he gets this smile on his face, like a kid on Christmas. I don't want to have to keep cutting him off because listening to him makes me feel stupid. I want to talk about work with him, like a good fiancée and wife would."

"You're a really sweet woman yourself, Penny," Samantha said with a smile. "I think most people in your situation would just tell him to shut up because it's boring. It's nice that you want to try."

"Thank you," Penny said. "I adore your brother, Samantha, and all I want is to make him happy."

"You already do," Samantha said. "When Leonard started talking about you on the phone…I had never heard him so happy. I really think you're the best thing that's ever happened to him."

"You have _no idea_ how great it makes me feel to know that someone in Leonard's family approves of me," Penny told her with a big, relieved smile. "Can you tell me what I could do to make your mother like me?"

"Earn a master's degree. Nothing less will work," Samantha told her. "That's not just for you. If I didn't have a medical degree and Leonard didn't have a doctorate, she would treat us the same way."

"She seems to treat Leonard like he only has a high school diploma, too," Penny observed.

"She's always been _really_ rough on Leonard."

"I just don't understand why."

"I don't know, either. If there's someone she should be rough on, it would be our brother Michael, the only one of us who doesn't have 'Doctor' in front of their name," Samantha said. "But ever since we were kids, she's been like this, constantly ridiculing Leonard. It was bad enough that he got teased so much at school. He had to come home to his work-obsessed father and demeaning mother. But I bet he thinks it was all worth it to get you."

"That is so nice of you to say," Penny said a bit tearfully.

"Are you okay?" Samantha asked.

"I'm just so relieved that you don't think I'm not good enough for your brother," Penny explained.

"I can tell that you truly love Leonard. That's all I want for my little brother," Samantha said.

Penny smiled as she continued to chat with Samantha. She couldn't stop thinking about how wonderful it felt to be accepted by even just one member of Leonard's family. But she still wanted to be seen positively by his mother. She realized that she had quite a battle coming, but knew that it would all be worth it in the end.


	10. Chapter 10

The following two weeks were full of activity. After a successful weekend spent with Samantha, a lot of progress had been made in planning the wedding, Penny had started a few classes at the community college, and Leonard had officially moved out of his and Sheldon's apartment. A week and half had passed since Leonard had left, and neither he nor Penny had heard a word from him since then. Sheldon had made Leonard return his key, so they couldn't stop by and check on him. While they were concerned, they didn't see much they could do about it.

While Penny was studying for a test in the physics class she was taking in an attempt to understand Leonard's work, she became completely stuck. She thought about waiting for Leonard to get home and asking him for help, but she really wanted to keep it as a surprise for him. She decided to go across to hall to see if Sheldon would help her.

Unlike their earlier attempts, when Penny knocked on the door, she didn't say who it was. After a few moments, Sheldon opened the door. She smiled at him, but it was not returned.

"Hello, home-wrecker," he greeted her.

"Sheldon, don't say that," Penny said.

"Why not? It's the truth." Sheldon pointed to the books she was holding. "What are those?"

"These are textbooks," Penny said, holding them up.

"'General Physics' and 'Introduction to College Algebra,'" Sheldon read. "What would you need these for?"

"I'm taking a math class and a physics class because I want to try to understand Leonard's work," Penny explained.

"Leonard's work is nothing extraordinarily difficult to comprehend, but these high school textbooks aren't going to get you anywhere," Sheldon told her.

"They're not high school! They're college!" Penny held up the math book. "See? Says right there. _College_ Algebra."

"But Leonard's work, while admittedly rather simplistic, is still at the graduate level, not community college. Therefore, your attempts to learn are futile," Sheldon said.

"Sheldon, just because you're mad at me for taking your roommate doesn't mean you can be cruel," Penny told him.

"I'm not being cruel. I'm telling you the truth. You'll never be able to understand Leonard's work."

"Okay, this was a mistake. I'm leaving," Penny said as she turned around and took a few steps away.

"What did you come here for in the first place?" Sheldon wondered.

"Because I'm an idiot, I came here hoping you would tutor me," Penny told him.

"Oh. Well, why didn't you say so?"

"What?"

"As a dedicated scientist, I have a responsibility to teach the ignorant about the mechanics of the physical world. Or, in your case, attempt to teach," Sheldon said, making Penny scowl. "Come inside. I'll do what I can."

"I am seriously going to regret this," Penny said as she entered the apartment. They settled on the couch and Sheldon took her textbooks.

"So what are you having trouble with?" Sheldon asked.

"Kinematics."

"And what's confusing you about that?"

"Everything."

"Oh, we do have a lot of work to do," Sheldon said. "Kinematics is the branch of classical mechanics which describes the motion of points, objects, and groups of objects, without consideration of the causes of motion."

"Why would you want to study motion without considering what causes motion?" Penny wondered.

"You do realize that a key part of learning is attending class, don't you?" Sheldon asked.

"I _do _attend class, Sheldon, I just…"

"What?"

"I just don't understand what's happening in class," Penny told him.

"Penny, can I ask you a question?"

"I know I'm also going to regret this, but sure."

"Why are you wasting your time and money attempting to study physics and math when you know that you don't have the intelligence level to comprehend it?" Sheldon asked.

"Can I ask _you_ a question?"

"But you didn't answer mine."

"Good observation. Why do you constantly have to put people down?"

"I don't put people down, Penny. I merely tell them the truth that no one else seems to be willing to say," Sheldon said emotionlessly.

"People don't say it for a reason," Penny said. "You can't go around telling people that they're stupid and that their work is meaningless."

"But it's true."

"It's _not_ true!" Penny exclaimed. "Leonard's work is not meaningless. He's discovering important information about the universe, I know that much. And I know that I'm not book smart like you and Leonard, but I am _a lot_ more street smart than you, and you can't deny that."

"Book smart and street smart? What are you, a gangster?" Sheldon asked.

"No. Book smart means you're smart in math and science and that stuff. Street smart means you know how to act like a human being! You try to tell me that I'm not more street smart than you!"

"Penny, you're yelling at me," Sheldon stated.

"Yeah, because I'm frustrated!" Penny said. "I know you're upset with me, but I have enough people telling me that I'm stupid right now. I don't need someone who for some reason I consider to be a friend to tell me that, too!"

"I'm not upset with you."

"Yes, you are! If you weren't upset with me and Leonard, then you would be talking to us and letting us into the apartment when we try to come over," Penny said.

"I'm only frustrated because Leonard violated the roommate agreement. He moved out without submitting a written notice and didn't wait the five weeks."

"No, that's not why you're upset. You're upset because you don't have Leonard around to be your playmate anymore," Penny said. "I'm sorry things are changing, Sheldon, but you have to understand that life without change isn't life."

"I don't understand," Sheldon said.

"Change is what drives life. If you don't have change, then you're not living," Penny said. "If everything stayed the same forever, then there wouldn't be any opportunity to change and adapt and grow."

"But I don't want to change or adapt or grow," Sheldon said.

"I know you don't. But I'm trying to make you understand that you have to do all of those things because that's what makes us human—evolution."

"Well…when you put it that way…Evolution is a necessity for the survival of our species, so perhaps it's not such a bad thing," Sheldon said after a minute of thought.

"It really isn't. I know this evolution is going do be strange, but it's also going to offer a lot of new opportunities, like when humans got opposable thumbs," Penny said, realizing she had found a way to make him understand.

"I'm not sure I see the positive outcomes this evolution could cause," Sheldon said.

"Well, it could give you a chance to meet someone new if you get another roommate," Penny proposed. "It could give you the opportunity to create some new theories in peace now that you won't have someone around to distract you."

"That is true. Imagine the kinds of discoveries I could make without you and Leonard around crying to a deity that neither of you believe in," Sheldon said.

"I was thinking, you know, Leonard watching TV, but okay," Penny commented, shaking her head. "See? There are a lot of great things coming for all three of us from Leonard moving out."

"Penny?"

"Yeah?"

"Is Leonard happy?" Sheldon asked. Penny smiled as she began to melt once she was finally starting to see a human part of him.

"Yes, Sheldon. Leonard is _very_ happy," Penny assured him.

"You know…I am glad you're engaged," Sheldon said.

"Really?" Penny asked, surprised. Sheldon nodded. "Why?"

"Because whenever you two were not in a relationship, all Leonard could talk about was ways that he could get you to like him. Then when you broke up with him, all he could talk about was how he could get you back," Sheldon explained. "The only time he was truly tolerable to live with because he wasn't constantly moping around was when you were in a relationship together."

"That is the sweetest thing ever," Penny said with a big smile.

"But I still don't see why he had to move out," Sheldon said, ending the moment. Penny sighed, knowing he was hopeless.

"Well, thank you for mostly understanding," she said. "Do you think you could try to tutor me again?"

"I don't know if that's a great idea," Sheldon said.

"Why not?"

"It would be a waste of my valuable time now that I have the peace I need to create truly groundbreaking theories," Sheldon explained. "I know you don't want to hear this, Penny, but you're hopeless."

"Alright. Great talking to you, too," Penny said as she grabbed her books and headed across the hall to her apartment. She closed the door and threw her books on the coffee table, mentally exhausted from the exchange she had just had with Sheldon. She flopped onto the couch and cracked open her books again, determined to get some studying done before Leonard got home. However, the subject was so dull to her, she ended up thinking about what had just happened. She knew what Sheldon didn't: while she may have been hopeless in physics, he was equally hopeless in a very different way.


	11. Chapter 11

"Penny? Penny, wake up."

"Mmm. Forty-eight," Penny mumbled as she felt someone gently shaking her awake. She slowly lifted her head off of her open notebook, revealing graphite numbers on her cheek that had rubbed off the paper.

"What are you doing?" Leonard wondered with a laugh.

"Sleeping, I guess," Penny said, still barely conscious.

"What's all this stuff?" Leonard asked as he picked up her physics book.

"No, don't look at that," Penny said as she tried to grab it from him, but it was too late.

"What is this, Penny?" Leonard wondered.

"Nothing. Just leave it," Penny told him.

"Have you been taking a physics class?" Leonard asked. Penny sighed, knowing her secret was gone.

"It was supposed to be a surprise," she told him.

"Why? You hate science."

"No, I don't. I think it's kind of interesting," Penny said. Leonard gave her a questioning look. "Okay, it's the most boring thing in the universe. I don't know how you don't kill yourself every day."

"Personal preferences, I guess," Leonard said with a small smile. "So if you hate it so much, what compelled you to take a physics class?"

"I…I wanted to be able to talk about work with you," Penny admitted. "Whenever you start to talk about what you're working on, you always get so excited. I hate cutting you off, but listening to you makes me feel so stupid."

"Why would you say that?" Leonard asked.

"Because I can never understand anything you're saying."

"I'm really sorry. I wasn't trying to make you feel stupid," Leonard said. "It's just that most people don't really care about what I do, but I think it's fascinating, and I love to talk about it. I guess I shouldn't have tried to talk about it with you if it makes you feel stupid."

"No! I'm your fiancée, Leonard! Fiancées are supposed to talk about work with their future husbands, especially when you're as interested in your work as you are," Penny said. "I want to talk to you about your experiments, but I _really_ want to be able to understand and contribute something, not just sit there blankly and listen. So I thought I would try to take a class. But it's been a lot harder than I thought it would be."

"Physics isn't an easy thing to grasp," Leonard told her.

"But you and Sheldon make it seem so easy," Penny said. "You wouldn't have gone to school for it if it wasn't easy for you."

"That's the complete opposite of why I studied physics," Leonard said. "I chose to study physics because I found it fascinating and because I thought it was _really_ hard."

"Why would you choose to study something that you thought was _really _hard?" Penny wondered.

"I don't know. I guess because everything I had ever taken in high school was _so_ easy. I wasn't even _remotely_ challenged until I got to AP Physics," Leonard began to explain. "I love to be challenged intellectually. I love, you know, pushing my brain to its limit. Since I also found physics to be _so_ intriguing, it seemed like the perfect thing to study."

"See, when I was in high school, I thought _everything _was hard. I never had one class that I thought was easy," Penny said. "I can't push my brain to its limit because my brain has nothing in it."

"Penny, don't say that," Leonard said sympathetically.

"But it's true, Leonard," Penny said sadly. "I tried to learn some physics, and I ended up falling asleep. I can't do anything."

"If you really want to learn, I'm more than willing to help you," Leonard offered.

"I tried to get Sheldon to tutor me, but he just said that I'm stupid," Penny said.

"Penny, you're not—"

"Say what you want, but you can't deny that Sheldon is the only person who isn't afraid to tell it _exactly _like it is." Penny covered her face with her hands and sighed. "Sheldon's right. Your mom's right. You shouldn't be engaged to someone so dumb."

"But Penny, you're _not_ dumb. How can I make you believe that?" Leonard asked.

"Maybe if I can manage to get myself to understand physics."

"Why does it matter if you can understand physics or not?" Leonard wondered. "Just because you're not great at math or science doesn't mean you're stupid. It just means that math and science aren't your thing, which is fine. You're good at other things."

"Like what?" Penny challenged him.

"You know everything about people. I suck at that," Leonard pointed out.

"Yeah, but that's street smart. I want to be book smart."

"And I want to be street smart," Leonard said. "I would give up some of my intelligence if it meant I could have had social skills growing, if I knew how to act around people. If I did, I would have made friends before I graduated college." Leonard took Penny's hand. "Being book smart isn't all it's cracked up to be. Being the smartest kid in school also meant being the loneliest."

"That is the saddest thing I've ever heard," Penny said.

"I don't want to make you sad. I'm just trying to show you that being street smart isn't the worst thing in the world," Leonard told her. "I think it's really sweet that you've been trying so hard to learn some physics. But if you're miserable while you're doing it, then I don't want you to."

"It hasn't just been for you. It's been for myself, too," Penny said. "I thought that when I took this class, it would make a lot of sense immediately, and I could prove to myself that your mother was wrong. But I just ended up proving that she was right. I can't learn anything."

"Stop it, Penny. Don't call yourself dumb again," Leonard said firmly. "I promise you that not being good at science doesn't make you stupid. But if you refuse to believe that, then I will teach you what you need to know to talk to me about my job."

"It's pointless, Leonard. I won't be able to understand it."

"Yes, you will," Leonard told her. "You are brilliant, Penny. If you set your mind to something, and I know you already have, then you can do anything, especially with the right teacher. Sheldon sucks at teaching, and classes can go really fast. I'll go exactly at the pace you want me to, I'll repeat anything you need me to repeat until you understand. I'll prove to you that you can understand physics. I promise."

"Really?" Penny asked.

"Of course. And I won't teach you anything that doesn't relate to what I do. I'll just teach you what you need to know. Do you want to do it?"

"I really, really do. I just want to prove to myself that I can understand something like this," Penny said. "Teach me things, Leonard."

For two hours, Leonard attempted to teach the different aspects of his work to his fiancée. It took a lot of explaining and re-explaining, but eventually, Penny began to feel more confident.

"Alright," she finally said. "I want you to quiz me."

"You sure?" Leonard asked. Penny nodded. "Alright. What are subatomic particles?"

"Subatomic particles are particles that are smaller than atoms," Penny said, speaking slowly but rather confidently. "There are elementary particles, which, for some reason that really doesn't make sense to me, aren't made from particles, and composite particles, which _are_ made from particles. Am I right?"

"Almost perfect. Technically, everything is made from some kind of particle. The thing about elementary particles is that are made from nothing but subatomic particles. Composite particles can be made from subatomic and atomic," Leonard told her.

"Damn it," Penny said, her confidence disappearing.

"That was still great, though! Subatomic particles aren't easy to understand," Leonard said encouragingly.

"Give me another one," Penny said.

"Are you sure?" Leonard asked again.

"Yes. I'm not going to stop until I get this right."

"Okay." Leonard took a moment to think of a question. "Alright, this is a tough one. It goes with quantum mechanics, which is difficult for a lot of scientists to fully grasp. Explain what I told you about the Planck constant."

"I think I remember this," Penny said. "The Planck constant is the quantum of action. Then it has something to do with energy?" Leonard nodded. "Yeah, the energy of a charged atomic…escalator?"

"Oscillator, but keep going."

"Okay. The Planck constant describes the relationship between energy and frequency, which is called the Planck-Einstein relation."

"Exactly right," Leonard told her. "I want to show you something." He picked up a notebook and a pencil and began to write something down. After a few moments, he showed the notebook to Penny. She looked it over.

_H=6.626 069 57(29) X 10__-34__ J.s=4.135 667 516(91) X 10__-15__ eV.s_

"Please tell me I shouldn't know what that is," Penny said nervously.

"You _do_ know what that is," Leonard said. "_That_, Penny, is the mathematical formula for what you just described to me."

"How the hell do you remember that?" Penny asked, her eyes wide.

"I have a pretty good memory with numbers. Not the point," Leonard said. "The point is, this is _serious_ physics, and you just explained it to me. You can't be stupid if you can explain that."

"I just explained _that_?" Penny asked, pointing to the equation. Leonard nodded. "You're telling me that I explained something like _that_?" Leonard nodded again. "Holy crap. Maybe I can be smart."

"No, you can't just _be_ smart. You _are_ smart," Leonard told her. "That was great, Penny. Really, _really_ great."

"Screw Sheldon. Screw your mother. You were right. I _can_ learn science. I'm not an idiot. I'm not as smart as you, but I'm not an idiot. An idiot couldn't do that," Penny said, still staring at the notebook.

"There's the revelation I've been waiting for!" Leonard said with a big smile.

"Thanks for being so patient with me, Leonard. You're the best fiancé ever," Penny said before she wrapped her arms around Leonard's neck and kissed him.

"It-It was my pleasure," Leonard told her after they separated. Penny smiled at his blushing cheeks, something that almost always seemed to happen after they kissed.

"Can I teach you something now?" Penny asked.

"Sure. What do you want to teach me?" Leonard wondered.

"I want to teach you how to plan a kick-ass wedding reception," Penny told him.

"That is something I don't know how to do. I would love for you to teach me," Leonard said.

"Then let's start _my_ lesson." Penny grabbed her computer from the coffee table and pulled up a wedding planning checklist, ready to teach Leonard what people like at parties.


	12. Chapter 12

At her request, for the next week, Leonard continued to give Penny short physics lessons. She was catching on to more and more, and while she knew she would never get anywhere near the level Leonard was at, she felt better about herself than she had in a long time.

"Alright, quiz time," Leonard said. "Explain the string theory."

"The string theory—" Penny was interrupted by someone knocking that door.

"Hold that thought," Leonard said before he got off the couch to open the door. When he saw who was there, his eyes bulged out of his head.

"Who is it, Leonard?" Penny asked as she joined him at the door. She saw a middle aged woman standing in the hall.

"Is this her?" the woman asked.

"Leonard, who is this?" Penny asked again.

"Mom…What are you _doing _here?!" Leonard exclaimed.

"This is your _mother_?" Penny asked.

"Are we just going to stand her like morons, or are you going to invite me inside?" Beverly said.

"That depends on what you're here to say," Leonard said cautiously.

"Let her in, Leonard," Penny said.

"Are you sure?" Leonard asked. Penny nodded. "Alright, Mom. If she's okay with it, you can come in." He moved aside and let Beverly inside.

"This apartment is a pig sty," Beverly stated as she observed the living room.

"Yeah, uh, had I know you were coming, I-I would have cleaned up for you," Penny said. "Beverly, right?"

"Yes," Beverly said emotionlessly.

"I'm Penny, Leonard's fiancée," Penny said with a friendly smile as she extended her hand. Beverly didn't take it. "Okay, then."

"Mom, be polite," Leonard said. "What are you doing here, anyway? Why didn't you tell me you were coming?"

"I didn't tell you I was coming because I knew you would to everything you could to circumvent my arrival," Beverly told him. "To answer your first question, I'm here because I felt that I had no choice as your mother to meet the woman you wish to marry."

"So you're coming here out of a perceived obligation, not because you wanted to see me or meet the woman that I love?" Leonard asked.

"Yes."

"Okay, just making sure we had that clear," Leonard said. "What do you believe your obligation entails?"

"Why are you talking like that?" Penny whispered to him.

"She doesn't respond well to colloquial speech," he whispered back.

"Is she really so inept that she doesn't realize I can hear everything she's saying?" Beverly asked.

"Mom, she is _not_ inept," Leonard said firmly, not wanting Penny's newfound confidence in her intelligence to be shaken. "If you came here just to demean Penny, then you can leave right now."

"Leonard, as your mother, I feel that I have a responsibility to certify that the woman you wish to marry is fit for you. I'm sure Penny's family conducted a similar exercise with you," Beverly said.

"Yeah, they did. The difference is, Penny's parents are, you know, _sane_."

"It's okay, Leonard. My dad interrogated you. It's only fair for your mom to interrogate me," Penny said.

"Penny, what are you doing?" Leonard asked.

"I'm not afraid of her anymore," Penny replied before she turned back to Beverly. "I'll answer any questions you have for me, Mrs. Hofstadter."

"_Doctor_ Hofstadter," Beverly corrected her.

"Excuse me. _Doctor_ Hofstadter."

"Where were you raised, Penny?" Beverly asked.

"In a small town right outside of Omaha. You know, Nebraska."

"Yes. I know it might be difficult for you to grasp, but I mastered United States geography in kindergarten."

"Mom!" Leonard exclaimed.

"No, Leonard, it's okay. She's right," Penny said, her eerily calm smile holding on her face.

"No, it's not okay! Why are you letting her talk to you like that?!"

"Leonard, I know your intelligence level far exceeds the method in which I am speaking to Penny, but I believe it is very appropriate for her," Beverly said.

"Alright, that's it. I'm done," Leonard said, ready to try to remove her from the apartment.

"It's okay, Leonard," Penny said, still smiling. "I'm sorry, Dr. Hofstadter, I shouldn't have underestimated your intelligence like that."

"The apology is appreciated," Beverly said. "Is it true, Penny, that you have not received any education higher than secondary school?"

"Well, I wouldn't say that. I mean, I've been through the school of life," Penny said.

"So you have not received any _formal_ education further than high school?" Beverly asked.

"Yeah, that one's hard to deny," Penny replied.

"You are aware that my son has a doctorate in physics from an Ivy League university, correct?"

"Very well aware, thank you."

"Why would you believe that you are fit for Leonard when you only have a high school diploma?" Beverly asked.

"Because neither of us believe that it's education that matters. It's love," Penny told her.

"And who can I blame for planting that delusion in your minds?"

"Mom—"

"I've got this, Leonard," Penny said. "Do you have any other questions for me, Dr. Hofstadter?"

"How do you expect your career outlook to expand without any kind of degree?" Beverly asked.

"I don't. Next question."

"Do you have any plans for going back to school?"

"I'm considering it. Next question."

"Are you explicitly attempting to take my son away from a more qualified mate, or is it purely accidental?"

"Oh, I am _very_ explicitly attempting to take Leonard away from other women."

"Why would you want to do that? Do you hate him?"

"Oh, quite the contrary. I'm marrying him because _I_ _love him_ and never want to risk having another woman steal him from _me_."

"Whoa," Leonard said as he watched Penny drop her sweet façade and slip into attack mode.

"You know, I typically only converse with doctors, and you are giving me a clear reminder of why," Beverly said.

"It must be a humbling experience to have a conversation with someone at such a lower intelligence level than you," Penny said, putting her smile back on.

"At least you're intelligent enough to comprehend that," Beverly said.

"Yes, I am. Dr. Hofstadter, could I ask _you_ a question?"

"This should be intriguing. Speak."

"Would you happen to have any knowledge on the string theory?"

"I beg your pardon?"

"I'm surprised your clearly superior brain couldn't comprehend such a simple question. Do you have any knowledge on the string theory?"

"I'm afraid I didn't study physics in school. Why do you ask?"

"Because I happen to know that the string theory is a hypothetical framework in which the point-like particles of particle physics are replaced by one-dimensional objects called strings. It aims to explain all types of observed elementary particles using the quantum states of these strings," Penny said. Her smile grew when she saw Leonard and Beverly's wide eyes. "Oh, you don't have anything to contribute to that?" Leonard smiled, while Beverly remained stunned. "You know, it's really funny what you can learn in the school of life instead of the Ivy League."

"Any response, Mom?" Leonard asked. Beverly looked at him, then drifted her eyes to Penny. She smiled and folded her arms across her chest, clearly pleased with herself.

"I'll see you at the wedding." Beverly turned around and left, slamming the door behind her.

"Penny?" Leonard said once they were alone.

"Yeah?"

"That may have been the most awesome, hottest thing you have ever done," he said.

"I know, it was pretty great, right?" Penny said, grinning broadly.

"It was amazing! You have done what no one has ever been able to do."

"What's that?"

"Make my mother shut her big mouth," Leonard said. "You were incredible, Penny. I can't believe you knew all that stuff!"

"Well, I had a great teacher," Penny said as she went in to kiss Leonard.

"Thanks for doing what I couldn't," Leonard said when they separated.

"What's that?" Penny wondered.

"Stand up for you."

"Oh, don't say that. You never had a chance."

"Thanks, that makes me feel a lot better."

"No, no, no. It's just that, you know and I know that for some reason your mother doesn't respect you and would never believe anything you said about me. I knew the only way this would work would be if I stood up for myself," Penny explained.

"Well, it worked. That's all that matters."

"Mmm-hmm." Penny shook out her arms. "Wow. Outsmarting your mom got me all riled up." Her eyes suddenly grew wide.

"What's wrong?" Leonard asked.

"That is what just happened, isn't it? I outsmarted your mom?"

"I think that's pretty safe to say, yeah."

"Holy crap. The girl without any education just beat the most pompous doctor I've ever heard of in a battle of the minds. Holy crap, Leonard, I just did that!"

"And I have never been more proud of you," Leonard said.

"But damn, that woman is exhausting, isn't she?" Penny said.

"Preaching to the choir, sister," Leonard told her as she shook his head. Penny smiled and kissed him again, thinking about how she had just won what could easily have been the greatest victory of her life.


	13. Chapter 13

The week after Leonard's mom came, Penny and Leonard ventured out to a bakery to try to pick out their wedding cake. While the store owner was in the back getting the samples she had prepared, Leonard looked at pictures of wedding cakes while Penny played on her phone.

"Hey," he heard a voice say behind him. Leonard turned around and saw a tall, attractive man smiling at Penny.

"Hey, there," Penny said, putting her phone down.

"I see a beautiful, slim woman standing in a bakery. Can I ask what your secret is?" the man asked.

"No secret. They're not in my routine," Penny said, giving him a small smile.

"Special occasion, then?"

"Very special occasion."

"Well, whatever it is, maybe I could take you out to dinner to celebrate," the man suggested. Leonard was furious, but since the last time he tried to stand up for Penny had ended so badly, he couldn't make himself move.

"You know, I would love that," Penny said, making Leonard's mouth drop open.

"Excellent. Can I pick you up tonight at eight?"

"Absolutely. Can my six-foot-six, bounty hunter fiancé come with us?" Penny asked, holding up her ring.

"Sorry, ma'am," the man said before he left the bakery. Leonard rushed back over to Penny.

"What was that about?" he asked.

"What was what about?"

"Your six-foot-six, bounty hunter fiancé?" Leonard questioned.

"Little white lie. What's the big deal?"

"Why couldn't you just say your five-foot-five, scientist fiancé?"

"Sweetie, don't be offended."

"Why shouldn't I be offended?" Leonard asked. "I know I'm not the kind of guy you would normally be in a relationship with, but you are. Why wouldn't you say it unless you weren't comfortable with it?"

"I don't care about how you look, Leonard," Penny said.

"If you didn't, then why didn't you tell him the truth, or just say 'my fiancé'?"

"Because I know guys like that. I dated them for years. You know what he would have said if I had said, 'my five-five, scientist fiancé'?"

"What?"

"'What's he gonna do about it? Let's go,'" Penny said, imitating a deep, male's voice. "I just wanted him to leave me alone. Don't make it a big deal."

"But it is a big deal to me," Leonard told her.

"Why?"

"Because…Because guys are constantly hitting on you. It makes me feel like you'd rather be with someone else."

"Sweetie, there is no one in the world I want to be with more than I want to be with you. I promise," Penny swore, looking Leonard directly in the eyes.

"Then it makes me feel like you're _supposed_ to be with someone else." Leonard looked at the floor for a moment, then back at Penny. "You know…You never answered my question."

"What question?"

"The night I proposed to you. I asked you why you first agreed to go out with me. You never told me," Leonard said.

"Leonard, sweetie, let's not talk about this here," Penny told him.

"No, I want to know now," Leonard said. "You know what my theory is?"

"What?"

"I was at The Cheesecake Factory drooling over you, one of your friends there saw me, and she dared you to go out with me."

"Why does it matter why I _started_ dating you? We're engaged now. I'm yours for life, okay? You have nothing to worry about."

"It matters to me, Penny," Leonard said, wringing his hands uncomfortably. "Girls never hit on me, and I've always been too shy to hit on girls. I watched all of the guys you brought home before we started dating. They were all tall and muscular and looked like Abercrombie models. Now you're engaged to this. I just don't understand why you gave up all that for me."

"Because I had a revelation, Leonard," Penny told him. "All of those ridiculously hot guys I dated? They weren't good for anything but sex. You're completely different from them."

"Yeah, they can probably have sex without having an asthma attack."

"True, but that's not what I mean," Penny said. "I don't want to tell you this, but since you're being so insistent, I'll say it. I first went out with you because I felt sorry for you."

"You felt sorry for me?"

"Yes. I knew how desperate you were to get me to like you, and I was starting to see how sad you were that I seemed oblivious. But I wasn't. I was well aware that you had a _huge_ crush on me, and I felt like I had to give you just one date."

"You were only going to go out on one date with me, and then what?"

"Then I was going to tell you that I didn't feel a strong connection and say we should just be friends," Penny told him. "But when I did go out with you…I don't know. Suddenly, socially awkward became cute, uncomfortable rambling became endearing, and scientific talk became kind of attractive."

"You really thought that?" Leonard asked.

"Well, not right away," Penny admitted. "I'll be honest. When I first got home, I went to bed thinking about what a nerd you were. But then I started thinking about it more, and talking to you more, and despite the fact that you weren't my usual physically…I wanted to go out with you again."

"Really?" Leonard said. Penny nodded. "Well…That's not the ideal answer I was hoping for, but…I guess it's a little bit better than you going in laughing at me."

"Of course I didn't," Penny said, her face clearly expressing untruthfulness.

"And you say I'm a terrible liar," Leonard said.

"I'm sorry, sweetie. I just don't want to hurt your feelings," Penny said.

"I'm just a little hurt," Leonard said.

"Why? I love you. I'm _marrying_ you. I'm yours forever. Why does it matter why I started dating you?"

"Because…I'm a scientist, right?"

"Yeah…"

"Scientists don't tend to have much faith in emotions, just numbers," Leonard began. "I was like that for a long time. I was raised in a cerebral household, and then after so many people teased me about everything, I think I started to use my intellect as a shield. So many people had hurt me, so I just wanted to hide in numbers. But then I met you. You changed me, Penny. You proved that love is possible, because I fell in love the minute I saw you. I guess it would have been nice if you had experienced something similar, not laughed at the concept of you dating me."

"Well, when you say it like that, it sounds horrible," Penny said, wishing she hadn't been so honest. "I shouldn't have told you any of this. I knew you would overreact."

"Maybe you think I'm overreacting, but if you were me and you had never had a girl be interested in you before, only to discover that when you met the girl of your dreams, she laughed at you and thought you were an awkward nerd, you would be hurt, too," Leonard told Penny.

"Okay, love birds, I have your wedding cake samples ready," the store owner said with a smile as she came out of the back, but neither Penny nor Leonard noticed her.

"Alright, I was a judgmental bitch back then, is that what you're saying?" Penny shouted.

"Okay. Bad time," the store owner said to herself as she backed away into the other room.

"No, I'm not saying you were a bitch," Leonard said.

"Then what are you saying?"

"I thought it was blatantly obvious by now that I never have any idea what I'm saying!" Leonard exclaimed. "I'm sorry, Penny. I was just saying what I was feeling."

"No. Don't be sorry. You shouldn't apologize for telling your fiancée what you're thinking," Penny said after a moment. "I'm sorry I made all those assumptions about you when we first met."

"No. You shouldn't be sorry, either. Everything you assumed was true," Leonard told her. "Maybe I am overreacting. I mean, you're right. You saw past everything until you got to me. You're going to marry me. I guess it shouldn't matter."

"But it _does_ matter to you," Penny said. "I know I was kind of quick to judge, and I can see why that would hurt you. Everyone made quick judgments about you when you were younger. It must suck to know that I judged you at first, too." Penny took a few steps closer to her fiancé. "I'm sorry, Leonard. Forgive me?"

"Of course," Leonard said.

"Good." Penny leaned in and gave him a quick kiss.

"That was our first fight as a nearly-married couple," Leonard observed.

"I have a feeling it's going to get worse when we have to decide how to decorate our house and whether our children will play chess or soccer," Penny said.

"Chess, all the way," Leonard chuckled.

"We can have that fight later," Penny told him. "You wanna go drink?"

"You know I have a hard time holding my liquor."

"We'll get you some Sprite and call it a gin and tonic. Come on. I need wine." Penny took Leonard's hand and led him out of the store, happy to have everything out in the open and still be on good terms with her fiancé.


	14. Chapter 14

A few days after the fight in the bakery, Leonard was sitting on the couch in what was now Penny _and_ his apartment reading a new comic book Penny had given him as a make-up gift, while Penny herself was in the bedroom on the phone with her parents. Just when Leonard was about to turn the page in a prime moment, Penny came back in.

"Leonard?" she said as she sat down beside him on the couch.

"What's up?" he said a bit absently, focused on the book. Penny grabbed it away from him. "Hey!"

"I'm sorry, but I need you to pay attention," Penny said.

"What's wrong?"

"Apparently, my bat shit crazy siblings want to meet you now," Penny told him.

"What's the big deal? I'll meet your siblings," Leonard said.

"Did I not mention that they're insane?" Penny said.

"Oh, I'm sure they can't be as bad as my mom."

"Oh, yeah? Katie Anne shot her husband, and Carter is in prison for cooking meth."

"Why isn't Katie Anne in prison if she shot her husband?"

"Some dishonest exchanges with the DA may have been made to get her off the hook. Can't really talk about it. Not the point," Penny said.

"Then what is your point? Why are you worried about me meeting your siblings?"

"Did you not hear me? They cook meth and shoot people!"

"Well, I don't intend on purchasing any meth, and I don't see any reason why your sister would want to shoot me."

"Leonard, I'm telling you, she is _off the chain_."

"She can't be _that_ bad," Leonard said.

"Alright. If you don't believe me, I'll tell the crazy bitch that she can fly out here and meet you," Penny said.

"Good. I'm sure it will be great."

"Mmm-hmm," Penny said skeptically. "And unfortunately, if you want to meet Carter, you'll have to visit the Nebraska State Penitentiary in Omaha."

"When does he get out? Before the wedding?"

"Not unless you want to be engaged for ten more years."

"We'll send pictures," Leonard said. Penny nodded. "Tell me about him, though."

"I already told you. Psychotic."

"Come on. Tell me _one_ good thing about your brother."

"He was really smart," Penny finally said after a few moments of thought.

"Really?" Leonard asked.

Penny nodded. "He really was. Loved to read. Made straight A's. Wanted to study chemistry. You would like him."

"So how did he go from wanting to be a chemist to cooking meth?"

"Well, he couldn't afford to go to college, and then he fell into the wrong crowd, and eventually, he figured the only way he could be a chemist would to be cook meth," Penny said.

"Living the dream," Leonard replied.

Penny nodded. "Yeah. Now that I'm thinking about it, maybe he wasn't so smart."

"What about your sister?" Leonard wondered.

"I'm telling you. Katie Anne is like the Grand Canyon. You kind of have to see it for yourself," Penny said. "You'll see her soon. She just called me to tell me that her plane just landed."

"What?"

"Yeah. She called and said she just got into Pasadena and wanted my address so she could take a cab here. She should be here any minute," Penny said.

"Who does that?"

"Told you, Leonard. Off the chain." Penny threw Leonard's book back into his lap before she stood up and began to tidy up the living room. Before she could make much of a dent in cleaning up the mess, someone knocked on the door. Penny threw the sweatshirt she was picking up back on the floor so she could answer it.

"Hey, Katie," she greeted her sister at the door.

"Such a warm welcome from the dear sister I haven't heard from in ages," Katie Anne as she walked past Penny into the house. Leonard placed his book on the table and jumped up to shake her hand.

"Nice to meet you, Katie Anne. I'm Leonard," he said as he observed Penny's sister. Other than the fact that she was a blue-eyed blonde, Leonard didn't see many physical similarities between the sisters. Katie Anne's hair was so long, it almost touched her hips. She wore a brown peasant skirt that when down to her ankles, crocheted cream top, and a pink embroidered belt. Earthy sandals and big wooden jewelry completed her quirky outfit.

"Can I get you something, Katie?" Penny offered.

"Sure. Coffee with—"

"Half a tablespoon of half and half, three and a half Splendas. I know the drill," Penny said as she headed into the kitchen to start her drink.

"So Leonard, Penny tells me you're an experimental physicist," Katie Anne said.

"Yes, I am," Leonard confirmed.

"I've never heard of that. What does it mean, experimental physics?"

"Well, contrary to a theoretical physicist, who tests hypotheses exclusively through mathematical equations, I use both mathematical equations and traditional experiments to test my hypotheses," Leonard explained.

"So you know all about physics, but you don't know how to talk to normal people. Good to know," Katie Anne said. Leonard began to nervously wring his hands.

"Katie Anne. Play nice with the other children," Penny warned as she handed her sister the coffee and sat down next to Leonard on the couch.

"What-What about you, Katie Anne? What do you do?" Leonard asked.

"I'm a clairvoyant," Katie Anne told him.

"A what?" Leonard replied.

"Oh, didn't I tell you, honey? Katie Anne has decided that she's a psychic," Penny said.

"Really? I-I did not know that," Leonard said, blinking.

"Well, it's not a decision, actually, it's a gift. I've had it since I was a child." Katie Anne turned to Penny. "Remember the time I saved your life? I told you not to step out of the tree house?"

"Yeah, because you pulled the ladder away," Penny said.

"Look, I don't want to fight. Anyway, I prefer the term 'intuitionist' or 'clairvoyant'. People hear the term 'psychic' and they think, you know, 'whack job'."

"Mmm-hmm. For a reason," Penny said, nodding slowly. Katie Anne glared at her.

"Well, how about that? I know a clairvoyant," Leonard replied, unsure of what to say.

"You're a skeptic, aren't you?" Katie Anne said.

"Did you read my mind to figure that out?" Leonard asked with a joking smile.

"I don't read minds. I just predict the future," Katie Anne said, not amused.

"Well, I guess you have to draw the line somewhere," Leonard said.

"Penny, where's your bathroom?" Katie Anne asked.

"Just down the hall. You'll see it," Penny said. Katie Anne stood up and headed down the hall.

"She seems…interesting," Leonard said.

"I told you she's bat shit nuts," Penny replied.

"I don't understand. I thought you believe in psychics."

"I believe in _legitimate_ psychics. I don't believe in nut jobs who wake up one day and decide they can predict the future and speak to dead people," Penny explained. "Look, whatever you do, don't bring up religion, yoga, or science."

"What? Why?"

"Because she gets all riled up really quickly," Penny said. "She believes that all religions are ridiculous and people should believe in ghosts instead. Yoga is a sensitive subject for her because she had a yoga studio that she had to shut down due to a 'power struggle in the yoga community'. And she thinks that people who believe in science are ignorant."

"People who believe in _science_ are ignorant? How about the people who believe in something that has been legitimately disproven hundreds of times?"

"By scientists, who, according to Katie, are jealous crocks," Penny said. "Just don't talk about it anymore, okay?"

"But science is one of the few things I know how to talk about!" Leonard hissed as they heard the door to the bathroom open. Katie Anne walked out and sat back down.

"So Leonard, what made you want to be a scientist?" she asked her future brother-in-law. Leonard looked at Penny, wondering how he should respond. She only shrugged.

"Well, I-I took a physics class in high school, and I thought it was really interesting, so I decided to study it," Leonard said.

"How do you live with yourself knowing that you're closing the minds of America's population?" Katie Anne asked. Penny sighed, knowing it was on now.

"I-I don't think I am. I think I'm opening doors when it comes to discovering facts about the creation of the universe," Leonard said.

"But you're wasting your life, because what you're discovering is wrong."

"Excuse me?"

"Katie Anne, please," Penny scolded.

"If it weren't for scientists like you, everyone would know the truth about the world," Katie Anne said, ignoring her sister. "If it weren't for you, people would believe in spirits and the afterlife."

"Maybe that's part of the reason why I do it, so people won't believe in that junk," Leonard said defensively.

"And maybe that's why my corner of society hates people like you," Katie Anne said, her eyes narrowing.

"Okay, you two, stop it," Penny said firmly. "Maybe you believe that the Big Bang created the universe, maybe you believe fairies created the universe. Either way, I don't care. I don't want to get into a battle of science versus spirit. I just want everyone to play nice."

"But Penny, you don't want your fiancé to sound like an idiot when he talks to people, do you?" Katie Anne asked.

"I really don't think Leonard is the one who's going to look like an idiot when talking about the creation of the universe," Penny said, rolling her eyes. "_Anyway_, why don't we all talk about something else, like…what our favorite foods are?"

"Seriously?" Katie Anne and Leonard asked in unison.

"Oh, just do it so no one dies," Penny said.

"Mac and cheese," Katie Anne said, rolling her eyes.

"Orange chicken," Leonard added.

"Oh, my God. You eat _meat_?" Katie Anne practically squealed.

"Oh, yeah. I might have forgotten to mention that Katie Anne is a very passionate vegetarian," Penny said, regretting asking the question.

"That-That's fine with me," Leonard said quickly, realizing that based on Katie Anne's past, when Penny said "so no one dies," she might not have been kidding.

"Yeah, but so is the Big Burst!"

"Big _Bang_," Leonard said, unable to stop himself from correcting her.

"Hey, why don't we talk about what year we would go to if we could travel back in time?" Penny suggested.

"You know, if you were such a great scientist, maybe you would understand just how unhealthy meat can be for you, and how eating meat hurts animals!" Katie Anne yelled at Leonard, ignoring her sister.

"Well, as a scientist, I do know that when prepared with minimal fat and oil, meat can be very healthy," Leonard said. "I'm also aware that eating meat can hurt animals because in order to consume them, they first must be slaughtered. I also know that eating meat is a form of population control and can actually be healthy for the environment."

"Why are you always trying to prove people wrong?!" Katie Anne exclaimed.

"I'm not trying to prove you wrong. I'm presenting another outlook for your open mind to consider," Leonard said.

"Oh, now you're calling me stupid?!"

"What? No, I'm not! How did you get _that_?" Leonard wondered.

"Leonard, don't say anything else," Penny instructed. "Katie Anne, chill out. Everything's fine."

"I'm not mad," Katie Anne said, suddenly completely calm and composed. Leonard stared at her quizzically, wondering how the woman's mind worked.

"Good. Well, now you've met my fiancé. I'm sure that the money you spent on a plane ticket here was completely worth it," Penny said sarcastically.

"Oh, don't worry about that, Penny. For now, there's still an ample number of people who come and ask me for my supreme services," Katie Anne said. "We'll see if that lasts with scientists like _him_ running around."

"Yeah, okay. Have a great trip back tomorrow. Enjoy Los Angeles. You should go downtown. I think you'll find a lot of people just like you," Penny said as she lifted her tiny sister from the chair and led her to the door. "It was _lovely_ having you, Katie Anne."

"I'll see you at the wedding, Penny!" Katie Anne said happily before she left. Penny closed the door and leaned against it as she slowly let out the breath she had been holding since her sister had arrived.

"Alright. I'll admit it," Leonard said.

"Admit what?"

"You were right. She's bat shit nuts."


	15. Chapter 15

Later that night, as Leonard and Penny were cleaning up their dinner of spaghetti, they heard people yelling across the hall. Penny dropped the plate she was washing in the sink and went to the door to get a better listen.

"Whoa. I think I hear Katie Anne," she said.

"What do you mean? From where?" Leonard asked as he joined her.

"From your old apartment," Penny told him.

"What the hell is she doing in there?" Leonard wondered.

"I only see one way to find out," Penny said as she opened the door and headed across the hall. Leonard followed her and opened the door to Sheldon's apartment. They saw Katie Anne and Sheldon standing in the middle of the room, and they did not look happy.

"Of _course_ ghosts are real!" Katie Anne shouted at him.

"How could you possibly think that?" Sheldon challenged.

"Because I have _seen them_!" Katie Anne exclaimed.

"I will give you some possibilities for your seeing ghosts besides paranormal activity," Sheldon said. "Option one: you were experiencing an electromagnetic field that can cause hallucinations. Option two: you were under the influence of hallucinatory drugs at the time. Option three, which seems the most probable to me: you are suffering from a mental illness."

"You think I'm suffering from a mental illness?!" Katie Anne screeched.

"Yes. Most likely schizophrenia," Sheldon replied.

"I am _not_ crazy! I am a very credible clairvoyant!"

"There is no such thing as a credible clairvoyant, seeing that nearly all aspects of the paranormal have been disproven in some way."

"Yeah, by scientists! Scientists are just jealous that they don't have our abilities, so they're trying to prove that we're crazy! It's _your_ fault that people are so skeptical of us now!"

"I don't see how it's my fault. My time is far too valuable to spend disproving childish theories," Sheldon said.

"It is _not_ childish! It—"

"Alright, alright, cut it out!" Penny yelled over them as she got in between Sheldon and Katie Anne.

"Penny, he's trying to say that clairvoyance isn't real!" Katie Anne whined.

"Penny, she's stupid enough to tell me that clairvoyance _is_ real!" Sheldon said, equally whiny.

"You're both acting like children! Calm down!" Penny said firmly. "Katie Anne, what are you doing here?"

"I was coming up to see you and Leonard, and this guy was going downstairs. I asked him if he'd like me to read his aura because I saw a lot of shadows around him. He called me an idiot and then went inside, so I followed him to try to knock some sense into him!" Katie Anne explained.

"Telling him you could see shadows around him was your first mistake," Penny told her.

"You know this guy?"

"Yeah, he was Leonard's roommate until he moved in with me."

"Oh, my God! Just another strike against your scientist boy toy! He lived with this close-minded fool!"

"Excuse me?!" Sheldon exclaimed.

"And there was your second mistake," Penny said with a sigh. "One, Leonard is not my 'boy toy', Katie Anne, he is my fiancé. Second, you have to respect what people believe. You can't force your own beliefs upon other people."

"Tell that to Mr. Physics here, who kept calling me stupid because of what _I _believe!" Katie Anne snapped.

"That's because he's Sheldon. He's beyond hope," Penny told her.

"You seem to be quite familiar with this woman, Penny. Who is she?" Sheldon asked.

"She's my sister."

"_That_ is your sister?" Sheldon said. Penny nodded. "Well, that certainly explains your lack of intelligence."

"Sheldon!" Leonard scolded him.

"What? If Penny comes from people who claim they can talk to dead people and see auras, then it clearly explains why she is incapable of understanding even the most basic scientific principles," Sheldon said.

"For your information, Penny knows about Planck's constant, the string theory, subatomic particles. She knows a lot!"

"Everyone is yelling at each other!" Katie Anne screamed.

"Well, you're certainly not making the situation any better by yelling that," Sheldon pointed out.

"I'm ready to shoot this guy, Penny!" Katie Anne told her sister.

"Calm down, calm down. No one here is getting shot tonight," Penny said, rolling her eyes.

"Then I'll beat his scrawny ass!" Katie Anne replied venomously.

"I find it difficult to believe with your tiny size and lack of muscles that you would be able to beat me up. You're the same size as Leonard, for heaven's sake," Sheldon said dismissively.

"Penny, if you've known this guy for awhile, then I can't imagine you haven't thought about taking him down about a hundred times before," Katie Anne said to her sister, her breathing quick from her anger.

"That's…not untrue, but we're not taking anyone down, Katie."

"Why not? I could take both of them!" Katie Anne whined.

"Why would I want you to beat up Leonard?" Penny wondered.

"_You_ wouldn't want me to, but _I _want to take both of them down!"

"Good gracious, Leonard, she resembles a microscopic version of the intellectually inferior individuals who enjoyed tormenting me in school," Sheldon commented.

"I don't want to agree with him, but I have to agree with him," Leonard said to Penny.

"Oh, so now you're calling me an idiot _and_ a bully?!" Katie Anne screeched.

"Guys, you are just getting yourselves in deeper and deeper," Penny said, shaking her head.

"I did _not_ call you a bully. I _implied _it. However, I did call you an idiot and still maintain that position," Sheldon said.

"You are the most arrogant, self-righteous, egotistical person I have ever met!" Katie Anne yelled at him.

"Those words are all synonymous," Sheldon pointed out.

"Penny?" Katie Anne said, clearly about to erupt.

"What's up?" Penny said, fed up with the childish situation.

"I don't understand how you're engaged to him," Katie Anne said as she pointed at Leonard.

"What did I do?" Leonard wondered.

"Have faith in science, that's what!" Katie Anne snapped.

"Now we're back to that?"

"We never left!"

"And you didn't believe me, did you, Leonard?" Penny said.

"I'm sorry, I'm just trying to figure out where we are right now," Leonard said. "Are you mad at me, or are you mad at Sheldon?"

"I'm mad at Sheldon, and by extension, mad at you," Katie Anne said. "I thought you said he's a genius, Penny."

"Leonard _is _a genius, but you're crazy enough to send frickin' _Einstein_ into a tailspin!" Penny told her sister. "Why don't we leave these boys here, I'll take you back to my apartment, and I'll make you some tea?"

"But I'm not done with them yet! Especially _him_!" Katie Anne said, pointing at Sheldon.

"But I'm done with you yelling at them, so you're coming with me." Penny grabbed her sister's hand and dragged her out into the hallway, slamming the door behind her. Leonard and Sheldon stared after them.

"What I wouldn't give to see the egg she hatched from," Sheldon said as he went back to his whiteboard full of equations.

"I've seen the egg, and it's really the rooster who's a little nutty," Leonard told him. "What are you working on?"

"You know I don't share my in-progress theories."

"I do. I was just looking for something to say." Leonard paused for a minute, then walked towards his former roommate. "I don't think you've said anything to me besides 'hello' as we pass each other in the hall since I moved out."

"Well, there's nothing that brings people together like a woman who is a few Fruit Loops shy of a full bowl," Sheldon said.

"That's a pretty good description of my sister-in-law," Leonard said with a small smile. "Seriously, Sheldon. Why haven't we talked? I've texted you and called you, but you never answered."

"I've been busy, Leonard."

"Doing what? Playing video games? Reading comic books? What's been keeping you from talking to me?" Leonard asked.

"Nothing."

"Are you still upset about me moving out?"

"No. I already discussed that with Penny."

"You talked to Penny?"

"Yes. She came over here asking me to teach her physics, but because she is so hopeless, we ended up discussing your moving out instead," Sheldon told him.

"Well, what-what did she say?"

"She explained to me how your moving out is a kind of evolution, and pointed out the positives of you leaving," Sheldon said, still staring at his board.

"Like what?"

"The one that most predominately stood out to me was that I could finally have some peace and quiet to create new theories," Sheldon told him. "Please don't tell me you want to talk about it, too."

"Well, we didn't say much when I moved out. I wouldn't be opposed to talking about it," Leonard said.

"Isn't one emotional whack job enough for one evening?" Sheldon whined.

"Come on, Sheldon. I just don't want you to be mad at me or whatever you are."

"I'm not mad at you. As I told Penny, I'm very happy for you."

"You're happy for me?" Leonard asked.

"Oh, for heaven's sake, how many times do I need to say this for you to comprehend it?"

"If you're happy for me, then why haven't you been answering my texts or calls or coming to visit?" Leonard wondered.

"Because I have been told that when a new couple moves in together, it represents the forming of a new version of life together. I assumed that you and Penny would want some privacy while you are forming your new version of life," Sheldon said.

"That is very considerate of you, Sheldon. I really do appreciate that," Leonard said, smiling. "But giving us privacy doesn't mean you can never talk to us again."

"Really?" Sheldon asked, turning to face Leonard for the first time.

"Of course. We still want to be friends with you."

"Is that so?"

"Yes. Becoming husband and wife isn't going to change the fact that we're stuck with you forever. And I say that in the best sense," Leonard told him.

"Well, that's good to know. Thank you for telling me." Sheldon turned back to his board effectively ending the conversation. After Leonard had been standing around for a few minutes, he faced him again. "Aren't you going to go back to Penny's apartment?"

"Frankly, I'm a little scared of my sister-in-law," Leonard admitted.

"Well…maybe you would like to spend the night here," Sheldon suggested.

"Maybe I will," Leonard said, smiling at his best friend. "Thanks, Sheldon. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Oh, don't thank me. Thank that moron Katie Anne for forcing us to be in the same room at once," Sheldon said.

"I'll tell her just that tomorrow. Night, Sheldon."

"Good night, Leonard," Sheldon said as he watched Leonard go down the hall into his old room. He couldn't stop himself from smiling, happy to have his playmate back under his roof.


	16. Chapter 16

A few days later, after they had finally gotten rid of Katie Anne, Penny and Leonard were sitting on the couch together watching TV. When the commercials came on, Penny turned to him.

"So I've been thinking," she said.

"Four ominous words," Leonard replied.

"I've been thinking, we've been engaged for a few weeks, and we've only told our shared friends and our families," Penny said.

"And?" Leonard wondered.

"And, we haven't told any of our other friends here or our friends back home. So I was thinking maybe we could have an engagement party."

"An engagement party?" Leonard asked. Penny nodded. "Is that a thing?"

"Yeah, it's a thing! I've been to plenty of them."

"Okay. If you want to have an engagement party, you can."

"Well, don't you want to have one, too?" Penny asked.

"I'm okay with whatever you want to do."

"That was not a definite yes, Leonard," Penny said. "Do you not want to do it? Because if you don't want to do it, then I don't want to do it."

"No, no. It's fine."

"That's still not a confident yes," Penny said. "Why wouldn't you want to?"

"Well, one, I don't like parties," Leonard said. "Two, I don't like meeting new people. Three, I don't have anyone to invite. But I'm going to have to face all three of those things at the wedding, so I don't see why we shouldn't get it over with now."

"That's not exactly how I want you to look at our engagement party and wedding reception," Penny said, frowning slightly.

"No, I'm definitely looking forward to the wedding. But mainly the ceremony and life with you afterwards, not the reception," Leonard explained.

"Well, do you want to throw an engagement party or not?" Penny asked. "I just thought it would be nice to do something for all of our friends if we want to keep the ceremony small."

"Whatever you want, Penny. If you want to do it, then I'm sure it will be great," Leonard said.

"Are you sure?" Penny asked. "I do know that you're not the biggest fan of parties, and I don't want you to be miserable the whole time."

"I'll be fine. If that's what you want, do it."

"One hundred percent sure?" Penny asked. Leonard nodded. "Alright. It'll be fun, I promise. Maybe I can even get a few of my friends from Nebraska to come out for it. What about you?"

"What do you mean?"

"Who are you going to invite? Anyone back in Jersey?"

"I don't really have anyone back in Jersey," Leonard told her.

"What do you mean?" Penny asked.

"I don't have any friends back home."

"Oh, come on. You don't have one friend from the science club or the comic book club?"

"For your information, I was not in the comic book club. I was in the chess club," Leonard told her.

"Yeah, there's a big distinction," Penny said with a teasing smile. "Seriously. No high school friends, college friends? Nobody?"

"I didn't have any friends in high school, and I really didn't have any friends in college, either," Leonard told her.

"Really?" Penny asked. Leonard nodded. "That's so sad."

"It's okay. I just became one of the few people I knew who remembered what they were paying for and got a PhD," Leonard said. "Anyway, the only people I want to invite are Howard, Sheldon, Raj, Bernadette, and Amy."

"You sure?" Penny asked. Leonard nodded. "Okay. But you don't mind if I invite some more people, do you?"

"Of course not. Invite as many people as you want," Leonard encouraged her.

"Alright. I promise it will be a great time," Penny said. She grabbed a pad of paper and a pen from the table while Leonard turned his attention back to the television, trusting her knowledge of parties that went as deep as his knowledge of physics.

**XXX**

After a few weeks of planning, Leonard found himself standing in the living room on the night of the party, waiting for Penny to finish getting ready.

"I don't want to rush you, but it would look kind of bad to be late for our own party," he shouted to her.

"Just a second, just a second," Penny called back. Leonard started to pace the living room for a few minutes until he heard Penny's voice behind him.

"Ready to go?" she asked. When Leonard turned around to look at her, his eyes bulged out of his head. She was wearing a skin-tight, sequined red dress and tall red heels that resembled Dorothy's ruby slippers. Matching red jewelry and dramatic red lipstick completed the look.

"You okay, sweetie?" she asked as she stepped closer to Leonard. "Leonard, say something." He remained silent, staring at her. "Honey, when you take a breath, at some point, you have to let it out." Leonard finally exhaled. "_There_ we go."

"Let-Let me ask you a question," he said. "Am I correct in thinking that _I _am engaged to be married to _you_?"

"You certainly are," Penny said with a broad smile as she wrapped her arms around Leonard's neck. "Sweetie, I don't hear any breath sounds again. Do you need another lesson?"

"You-You know, there have been studies that show that men are more physically attracted to women when they're wearing red," Leonard said after a few moments, unsure of what to do.

"Hmm. That's interesting. I should probably stop wearing red, then," Penny said.

"What? No. Why?"

"Because I love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you. The only way that's gonna be possible is if you don't die of a heart attack," Penny said with a teasing smile.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I just can't believe that I've gone from not being able to get a girl to talk to me to marrying you," Leonard told her.

"No, no. I appreciate being admired by breathless staring. It's a refreshing change of pace from just having people grab at my boobs." Penny pecked her fiancé's lips. "Ready to go?"

"I don't know. I think I'd have a lot more fun staying here alone with you. Which sounded kind of dirty, but I didn't mean it like that."

"Don't worry, sweetie. I know when you're attempting to talk dirty and when you're just being clumsy," Penny assured him. "Come on. We've gotta show up."

"I know. Let's get going." Leonard and Penny began their descent to the main floor, ready for a big night.

**XXX**

"It physically doesn't make sense. I don't understand how you can take your normal purse and condense it into that." Leonard and Penny were discussing her red, patent leather clutch bag as they walked into the restaurant with a private room where they were having the party.

"Well, I don't have my whole purse in there, sweetie," Penny said. "Stop thinking about the mathematics of it or whatever goes on in your brain. It's really much simpler than that."

"What can you fit in one of those?" Leonard wondered.

"A cell phone, a lipstick, a twenty, and a key. Necessities," Penny said simply.

"Penny, I found an airplane bottle of vodka in your bag one time and you called _that _a necessity."

"Well, I had to get through work somehow," Penny said as she walked through the door Leonard was holding open for her.

"I've never tried working under the influence. How'd it work out for you?" Leonard asked as they climbed the stairs to the second floor where the private room was.

"Pretty well. I didn't feel like killing myself all day," Penny told him. "But since you work with eyeball-melting lasers, I wouldn't recommend it."

"Fair point," Leonard agreed, stopping at the last door before they would enter the party. "There is one thing I forgot to ask you."

"What's that?"

"How many people are here?"

"Oh. Just, like, forty."

"Forty?" Leonard asked.

"Give or take. Is that a problem?"

"No, not a problem. It's just a lot of people."

"Oh, don't be shy. My friends are gonna love you." Penny gave Leonard a quick kiss. "Come on. Let's go inside." She opened the door and the two walked into the large room. Two women immediately ran up to them.

"Oh, my God! Penny! I can't believe it's you!" the first one said.

"You look amazing! Congratulations!" the second said. "So where's your fiancé?"

"Um, right here," Penny said, nodding towards Leonard. "Leonard, this is Justine and Faith. Ladies, this is my fiancé, Leonard."

"Wow. You guys are so cute together!" Faith said with a big smile, but since she had been the one who had asked if he was Penny's fiancé, Leonard wondered if she meant it.

"So what do you do, Leonard?" Justine asked.

"I'm a physicist."

"Is that like a scientist?"

"Exactly."

"So _that's_ it," Justine said, winking at Penny.

"No. That is _not_ it," Penny told her, frowning.

"What-What's not it?" Leonard asked.

"Really? You always said you were going to," Faith said.

"Going to what?" Leonard wondered.

"Sweetie, why don't you go find Howard and Raj and everybody while I catch up with Faith and Justine?" Penny suggested.

"O-kay," Leonard said before he walked away slowly.

"I am not marrying Leonard because of that," Penny snapped at the girls as soon as her fiancé was out of earshot.

"But you always said you were going to marry rich," Faith pointed out.

"Physicists don't make _that_ much money," Penny said.

"Um, have you ever looked it up? I did when I was deciding what kind of guy to look for," Justine said. "Physicists make, like, six digits. You knew that, didn't you?"

"No. I didn't," Penny said. "I never asked Leonard how much he makes because I don't care. I don't want to marry rich anymore. I want to marry for love."

"You see why we find that hard to believe, don't you?" Faith asked. "I mean, look at him. You two do _not_ go together."

"Just because Leonard's not tall and athletic doesn't mean we don't go together," Penny said defensively.

"Actually, yeah, it kinda does," Justine said.

"Do you hear yourselves? Why are you being so superficial?" Penny asked.

"It's just hard to believe, Penny," Faith said. "In high school, our favorite thing to do was pick on nerds like him. Now you're engaged to one? It's weird."

"That was high school. Things change. People change," Penny said. "Now that I've met Leonard, it made me realize that I was a terrible person in high school. I wasn't going to not date him just because he's a bit of a nerd."

"A bit? Look at him, Penny," Justine said.

"I don't care, and neither should you," Penny said. "Listen, Leonard is _really_ sensitive about this stuff. Please don't bring anything like this up tonight."

"Just tell us why you want to marry him if it's not for money," Faith said.

"Because he's brilliant and he's funny and he's the sweetest man in the world," Penny told them. "Leonard is the most amazing man I've ever been with. He's a million times better than those guys I used to date who didn't have anything to offer but sex. He is so smart, it's mind-blowing. I love that about him. I love seeing how flustered he gets when I turn him on; it's adorable. But you know what I love most?"

"What?" Faith asked.

"The fact that he actually cares about me and respects me and loves me, something I've never had with anyone else," Penny said. "I love Leonard, nerd or not, money or not. If you don't support us, then you can leave."

"We support you, Penny. We just think it's weird," Justine said.

"You're my friends, but I really don't care what you think of Leonard," Penny told her. "I'm going to find my fiancé and have a great night. See you around." Without waiting for a response from Faith or Justine, Penny walked away, searching for Leonard. It took a few minutes, but she found him standing in the hallway, away from the party.

"What's the matter, sweetie?" Penny asked when she finally found him and saw his sad face.

"All of your friends think you shouldn't be marrying me," Leonard told her, staring at the floor.

"Leonard, that's not true," Penny promised him.

"Yes, it is. It couldn't possibly be because you love me. It could only be because of my salary."

"But you know that's not true," Penny said. "In seven years, I have never once asked you how much you make because I didn't want you to think that and because it didn't matter. You're the only thing that matters." Leonard continued to stare at the floor. "Leonard, please say something."

"I know you told me that I shouldn't feel so insecure, and intellectually, I know that you're right. But I just can't help it," Leonard told her, still not making eye contact.

"Maybe this wasn't such a good idea," Penny said with a sigh.

"What?" Leonard asked anxiously as his head snapped up.

"Not getting engaged, sweetie. That's the best thing that's happened to me in my life," Penny told him with loving eyes. "I'm talking about the party."

"No, I know you really wanted to see your friends," Leonard said, starting to rally. "I'm sorry, Penny. I wish I could be more like you, not caring about what people think or say." He exhaled. "Come on. I don't want to ruin the night. Let's go have a good time."

"Are you sure? Because if you want, I have another idea," Penny said.

"What's that?"

"Did you ever go to prom?"

"No. Why?" Leonard asked, perplexed.

"Well, we're all dressed up. It'd be a shame for us to just go home," Penny said. "Wanna do what I did on my prom night?"

"That depends on what you did," Leonard told her.

"And I bet you're _dying_ to find out," Penny said with a smile. "I just want to say goodbye to one person from Nebraska really fast. You wanna wait here or come with me?"

"I think I'll just stay here," Leonard told her.

"Alright. Be back in a sec." Penny kissed Leonard's cheek before she went back inside. After waiting for a few minutes, the door opened, but it wasn't who Leonard was expecting.

"Hey. You must be Penny's fiancé," the woman who had appeared said.

"Yes. I'm Leonard," Leonard said as he extended his hand.

"Anna," she said, taking it. "Listen, I heard what those girls were saying to Penny."

"Yeah. So did I. They don't whisper as quietly as they think they do," Leonard said.

"You should have heard her trying to talk to me in class," Anna said with a smile.

"So you're from Nebraska?"

"Yeah. Penny and I were neighbors and best friends our whole life."

"I'm surprised she's never mentioned you," Leonard said.

"We call each other once a month, just to stay in touch, but we haven't seen each other since she moved to California," Anna said. "Anyway, I wanted to tell you that you are the best thing that could happen to Penny."

"Really?" Leonard asked, expecting something different.

"Absolutely. She was always going out with the worst guys with nothing going for them. From what I've heard, you've got a _lot_ going for you."

"I don't know if I'd say a lot—"

"She also said you were too modest," Anna interrupted him. "I just wanted you to know that as weird as it may look to people, I am so glad Penny found you. I think you're good for each other."

"You do?"

"Yeah. From what I've heard about you from Penny, you guys are such opposites that you really balance each other out. You make each other better."

"You think so?"

Anna nodded. "Absolutely. Since Penny met you and you guys have been dating, she's been different. You changed her in the best way. She's more open-minded, she's more accepting, she's smarter. You're the best thing that's ever happened to her."

"There you are!" Penny said as she stepped out into the hall with them. "I was just looking for you, Anna."

"It is so great to see you!" Anna said excitedly as she and Penny hugged. "I was just talking to Leonard."

"Oh, yeah?" Penny asked tentatively.

"Don't worry, all good things," Leonard told her.

"Of course good things. There's nothing but good things to say," Anna said. "Are you guys on your way out?"

"Yeah, we are. It just wasn't what we were hoping for, so we were going to do something just the two of us," Penny explained.

"Then I won't take away any of your time," Anna said. "I'm in town for a few days if you want to get together."

"Absolutely! Call me, okay?" Penny said.

"Will do. I'll see you soon. Nice to meet you, Leonard," Anna said as she opened the door to the party.

"Nice to meet you, too, Anna. Thanks for what you said."

"Of course. I'll see you around." Anna turned around and head back into the party.

"You ready to go?" Penny asked.

"I don't know. You're a little scary when you get all mysterious," Leonard told her.

"Don't be scared, sweetie," Penny said with a smile. She took his hand. "Come on. I'm going to show you my version of your first prom."


	17. Chapter 17

"You know, I wish you had let me drive."

"If I had let you drive, then it wouldn't have been a surprise. But don't worry. We're about to pull into our first stop."

After leaving the party, Penny had insisted on leading their adventure. Leonard looked up and saw where she was pulling in.

"McDonald's?" he asked.

"Mmm-hmm."

"Why are we at a McDonald's?"

"I told you. I'm showing you what your night would have been like if you had gone to the prom with me," Penny said as she put the car in park.

"I was kind of thinking something other than going to McDonald's."

"What kind of girl do you think I am? Some slut who'll have sex with anyone to get a hamburger?"

"I wouldn't say I think that's the girl you _are_. _Were_, maybe, but not _are_," Leonard told her.

"Well, you're wrong. The first stop after my date and I left the dance was McDonald's." Penny removed her seatbelt and grabbed her purse.

"Where are you going?" Leonard asked.

"On a rocket ship. Where do you think I'm going? In the restaurant," Penny told him.

"Penny, have you seen what we're wearing?"

"Yeah. I'm wearing a beautiful dress, you're wearing a lovely suit, and we're going to wear them inside the McDonald's. What's the big deal?"

"People don't go into a McDonald's all dressed up like this. Everyone's going to stare at us," Leonard said.

"Yeah. That's partially why my date and I did it," Penny told him. "Come on, Leonard. This night is going to go really slowly if you won't even go into the first stop."

"This is the first stop?"

"Hey, I might not have slept with my prom date, but that doesn't mean we didn't have a wild night. Now get out of this car or I'll drag you out," Penny said as she opened the car door. Leonard sighed, but followed her into the restaurant. As he predicted, everyone's heads turned when they walked inside.

"You two look a little old to be coming from the prom," the cashier said when they reached the counter. She pointed at Leonard. "Why's he all sweaty?"

"Sorry. My fiancé is a little nervous because this is his _very first time_ at a McDonald's," Penny told her, making both the cashier and Leonard's eyebrows raise. "Isn't that right, honey?"

"Um, sure," Leonard said, unsure of what Penny was doing.

"So what would you recommend?" Penny asked her. The cashier exchanged shocked glances between her coworkers, then finally settled back on them.

"Well…the chicken nuggets are pretty good," she said.

"Excellent. We'll take a hundred," Penny told her, causing her audience's eyes to bulge.

"A hundred chicken nuggets?" the cashier asked.

"That would be fantastic, thank you," Penny said with a broad smile.

"Well…okay…" The cashier went back to the kitchen to fill their order while everyone in the restaurant stared at the couple.

"What are you doing?" Leonard whispered to her.

"Showing you a fun night," Penny told him. After a few minutes of waiting, the cashier returned with a drive-thru bag.

"Here's your hundred chicken nuggets. That'll be twenty dollars," she told them.

"Okay. Sweetie, get your wallet," Penny said. While Leonard was reaching for his wallet, he heard the cashier yell and the sound of high heels clicking across the floor. When he looked up, he saw a flash of red and blonde running out the door.

"Come on, Leonard!" Penny screamed after him. Without thinking twice, Leonard followed Penny outside and into the car. Before he knew it, Penny had pulled out of the parking lot and there was a bag of chicken nuggets sitting on Leonard's lap.

"Well, that was fun!" Penny said with a wide smile.

"Are you insane?!" Leonard exclaimed.

"Mmm. Depends on who you ask. Eat up, we've got a lot to get through," Penny told him.

"Did we seriously just steal a hundred chicken nuggets from McDonald's?"

"For a genius, you're kinda slow to catch on sometimes."

"Okay. Breaking the law was the first stop of the night. I can't imagine what our last one is going to be."

"Oh, but it's such a petty law," Penny said.

"Yes, robbery. The lowest of all the felonies!"

"Don't be so dramatic. It wasn't robbery. At the very most, it was petty theft," Penny said. "You ready for stop number two?"

"I don't know," Leonard told her as she parked the car in a new location.

"Well, get ready. I'll be right back," Penny said.

"Wait! Where are you going?"

"To buy something. I'll be right back." Penny climbed out of the car and rushed into was Leonard saw was a dollar store. She returned a few minutes later with a plastic bag.

"What's in that?" Leonard asked.

"You ask so many questions," Penny said. "The fun is in the not knowing, Leonard. My date didn't tell me anything, and it was a blast guessing what was going to happen next. For once in your life just relax and enjoy the ride, okay?"

"Okay," Leonard finally said.

"Good. Now I have a question for you."

"What's that?"

"Who is the person that annoys you more than anyone else in the world?" Penny asked.

"Sheldon."

"Okay, the person who annoys you more than anyone else in the world and has a car," Penny amended.

"Has a car? Why do they need a—"

"You're asking questions again! Just answer mine."

"Fine. I guess…Okay, when I first started working at Caltech, there was this guy, Luke Ackerman."

"What'd he do?" Penny wondered.

"That was when I started doing research on Bose-Einstein condensates. It's a state of matter of a dilute mass of bosons that—"

"Yeah, I'm getting better at physics, but I haven't gotten there yet, sweetie. What'd he do?" Penny asked.

"He stole my research and published it under his name," Leonard told her.

"That's all?" Penny asked, earning a death glare from Leonard. "I take it that's not the same thing as taking some kid's homework and writing your name on it?"

"Not exactly, since a scientist's entire career is essentially based on having published research," Leonard said. "Anyway, he got caught, I got published, and they fired him, but it was the worst."

"Do you know where he lives?" Penny asked.

"Fourteen Hillcrest Drive," Leonard blurt out. Penny looked at him, a bit surprised. "I may have stared at his address and contemplated how amazing it would be to go over there and beat him up."

"That's adorable," Penny said as she began to enter the address into her GPS. "Alright. Only fifteen minutes away." She pulled out of the dollar store's parking lot and hit the road.

"So what are we supposed to do with the chicken?" Leonard wondered.

"What did I say about asking questions?"

"What can I say? I'm an inquisitive guy."

"Then you're gonna suffer tonight," Penny said as she turned on the radio to prevent any more questions from being asked.

When the GPS directed them onto Mark Ackerman's street, Penny parked the car five houses down the road. She grabbed the bag and got out of the car.

"You parked at the wrong house. It's number fourteen," Leonard told Penny as he followed her up the street.

"Oh. That's so cute. It's like you've never done anything like this before," Penny said. "Keep your voice down and follow me."

"Done what before?" Leonard asked, which was followed by Penny shushing him. They made their way to the right house and saw the lights in the living room on.

"He's here. Perfect," Penny whispered.

"Why are we whispering? Aren't we going to knock on the door, anyway?" Leonard asked.

"Oh, sweetie. You really are adorable," Penny said as she took his hand and dragged him up the driveway where he had a black BMW parked.

"Alright. Let's do this," Penny said as she reached into the plastic bag. She pulled out a can and handed it to Leonard.

"What is this?" he asked, struggling to read the label in the dark.

"Dry shampoo."

"It's _what_?"

"Dry shampoo. Makes the car sticky," Penny said, smirking.

"They sell dry shampoo at the dollar store?"

"There you go asking questions again," Penny said. "Just do as I say, shake the can, and spray it all over the car."

"Okay," Leonard said, not really seeing the point. But he shook up the can and started to spray it on the car in short bursts. Penny, on the other hand, when full speed ahead and covered the windshield.

"Why is the windshield now opaque?" Leonard asked her.

"I don't know what that means."

"Not see-through."

"Oh! Because that's the point. Keep spraying."

"I don't understand what we're doing," Leonard said as he continued to spray. Finally, both of their cans were empty and Penny had him stand back a few feet.

"Penny."

"Yeah?"

"That is _not_ dry shampoo."

"I know. I can't believe you bought that. Dry shampoo at the dollar store? That stuff goes for thirty bucks!"

"Penny, did we really just entirely cover a man's BMW with Silly String?"

"Payback's a bitch," Penny replied. Suddenly, a light came on from the porch, fully illuminating the car. Their handiwork was now very apparent to the car's owner, who was standing outside.

"What the hell?!" he exclaimed.

"Run!" Penny whispered to Leonard before she darted towards their car. They both scrambled inside and drove away as fast as they could.

"Holy crap," Leonard said, breathing heavily. "So, let's make a list. Now we have petty theft and vandalism _and_ trespassing on our list of crimes!"

"At least I didn't tell you to throw eggs at his house or toilet paper in his trees," Penny said.

"People do that?"

"Again, you are so cute. Seriously, what did you do in high school?" Penny said.

"I sat in my bedroom reading books, I didn't run out on the streets adding to my list of delinquencies!"

"He deserved it! He stole your research, remember?"

"Good point. Screw the bastard. That was awesome," Leonard said, a smile finally emerging.

"See? It feels good to be bad, doesn't it?" Penny said, happy to see him excited. "See, in normal circumstances, kids in high school go out without supervision and practice being bad so they can figure out what good is. Their frontal lobes are the size of dried-up raisins. You have to exercise your frontal lobe by doing bad things so it won't be a raisin. Scientific fact."

"That's not a scientific fact," Leonard informed her.

"That's what my science teacher told us in school. I based a lot of life decisions off of that lesson," Penny said. "Well, I reject your science and substitute my own."

"I love when you try to be scientific," Leonard said with an amused smile.

"As long as you don't mind it being a failed try," Penny said, making Leonard smile more. "Time for our final stop, Leonard."

"I assume I shouldn't bother to ask what that is?"

"Finally catching on. I will tell you that I'm going to have to improvise a bit because I don't think Pasadena has an abundance of cornfields," Penny said. "Time for the radio again." She pushed the button and let music play for the thirty minutes she was driving. Eventually, she pulled into what appeared to be a vacant lot.

"What are we going to do here?" Leonard asked.

"You'll see. Get out of the car," Penny instructed. Once they were both out, she gave her next instruction. "Now sit on the hood."

"Okay," Leonard replied as he did what she said. They ended up lying on the hood of the car together looking up at the starry sky.

"The last stop on my prom night was this big cornfield. We laid on the hood and watched the stars," Penny said.

"That's nice," Leonard said. "So what was this guy's name?"

"Mark Sinclair. He was the captain of the varsity lacrosse team," Penny told him. "We thought the dance was lame, so he asked me if I wanted to have real fun. I thought he meant sex, too, but he meant this. I thought it was a lot better, just 'cause it was different and unexpected."

"I agree," Leonard said. "I think it's pretty obvious that I was a little freaked when we started—"

"Blatantly obvious, yes."

"But it actually turned out to be really fun. I finally got to know what it's like to be a normal teenage vandal."

"I'm sure you weren't as weird as you think you were."

"Stop lying."

"Okay," Penny said. "I'm glad I got to be the one to show you what it's like to have a semi-normal prom night."

"I'm glad you were, too," Leonard said, smiling at her. "If this is any indication of what our married life is going to be like, then I'm going to have to start preparing myself for some seriously wild rides."

"You know something?" Penny asked.

"What's that?"

"This was way more fun than any party could have been," Penny said before she kissed him. They spent the rest of the night in a comfortable silence, staring at the sky.


	18. Chapter 18

The day following their night of adventure, Penny blew off her shift to have lunch with Anna while Leonard was at work. She picked Anna up at her hotel and took her to her favorite restaurant.

"We haven't talked since you called to tell me that you're engaged. How's that been going?" Anna asked once they had been seated.

"A little harder than I expected," Penny admitted.

"Why? Are you and Leonard having problems?"

"No, Leonard's great. For the most part."

"What does that mean?"

"I mean, Leonard is the _perfect _guy. But he's so insecure. I think it's sweet, but it's also sad and gets annoying after while."

"Why is he insecure?" Anna wondered.

"Because guys hit on me everywhere we go, even if he's standing right there," Penny explained. "I never flirt back, but Leonard sees it as people assuming we could ever be a couple because of the way he looks."

"I think he's cute. Not tall and muscular cute, but, you know…awkwardly cute," Anna said.

"I agree! I think he's adorable, and I tell him that all the time." Penny sighed. "I don't know. I can't imagine how hard it must be for him to have people constantly telling him that we don't go together because of how he looks and what he likes. But at the same time, I don't understand why he can't just accept what I'm saying when I tell him I love him and that he is the only one in the world I want to be with. I don't understand why he cares so much about what the world thinks."

"I don't want to make any assumptions, but I'm going to," Anna said. "Can I assume that Leonard was teased growing up?"

Penny nodded. "Yeah. He said he didn't have any friends and people picked on him all the time."

"When he was in school, the world judged him because he was short or liked science or whatever bullshit reason kids came up with to make fun of him. Now people are looking at him with you and making the same assumptions about him. Maybe he feels like he did in school," Anna suggested.

"You think?" Penny asked.

"I don't know. It's just a theory."

"I mean, it would make sense," Penny said after a moment of thought. "Well, now I feel bad about being annoyed by him being self-conscious if it was because he feels like he did when he was being bullied."

"In a way, that's exactly what's happening," Anna said. "It's natural for children to single out other children who are different. The funny thing is that adults do it just as much as children do. The difference is that adults are more constrained by social inhibitors. They're not as open or honest about it as children are."

"There's the psychologist in you," Penny said, making Anna smile.

"My point is, adults are just as likely to bully people as children are. They're just more subtle about it. Whether he realizes it or not, I think Leonard is so upset when people hit on you or look at you funny when you go out together because when it happens, he feels like he did when he was being bullied as a kid."

"Anna, would you do me a big favor?" Penny said after a moment of thought.

"Anything. What is it?"

"Now that I know about this—and I think you're absolutely right—I'm realizing that nothing I say is going to convince Leonard that he shouldn't feel so insecure," Penny began. "Maybe it would work if a licensed psychologist talked to him about it?"

"I'd be happy to, Penny. I don't want your fiancé to think he's not good enough for you," Anna told her.

"Thank you so much. I just hope this will help him," Penny said. "But in the meantime, tell me what's been going on with you."

After they finished their late lunch, Penny took Anna back to her apartment, where they continued to chat together over glasses of wine until Leonard came home.

"Hey, sweetie," Penny greeted him as she jumped off the couch to give him a kiss. "How was work?"

"Great. I'm working on a bunch of really interesting things," Leonard said as they sat down on the couch together.

"You can tell me about it over dinner," Penny said.

"Hi, Anna," Leonard said to their guest once they were settled.

"Nice to see you again," Anna said with a smile.

"Anna and I have been talking all day. She's the only thing I miss about Nebraska," Penny said.

"I'm glad you guys had fun," Leonard said.

"We did. Lots of fun," Penny said with a smile. "I think I'm gonna go throw a load of laundry in. You two talk amongst yourselves."

"You're doing laundry? Now?" Leonard asked as he watched Penny grab her laundry basket.

"Why not? Anna and I have been talking all day. You two should get to know each other. I'll be back." Penny took the overflowing basket and left he apartment.

"That was a little weird," Leonard said once she was gone.

"Well, it's Penny. You knew what you were getting into," Anna said with a smile. "Penny mentioned that you have a PhD in physics. Where did you do your doctoral work?"

"I studied at Princeton."

"Wow, that's impressive. I got my doctorate from Northwestern."

"Oh, I didn't know you have a PhD. What in?"

"Psychology. I'm a clinical psychologist," Anna told him.

"That must be really interesting, picking people's brains every day."

"I do love to pick through brains," Anna said. "You know, Penny mentioned something to me earlier today."

"What's that?" Leonard asked.

"She told me that you tend to feel pretty insecure when you're out together."

"Oh, God. You're not going to pick _my_ brain, are you?"

"Not exactly. I just thought I would try to get to the why of that," Anna said. "It kind of bothers Penny, and it obviously bothers you."

"It bothers Penny?" Leonard asked.

"She just doesn't like seeing you so uncomfortable and down," Anna told him. "Why do you think you feel so insecure when you're out with Penny?"

"It's not the being out with Penny part that makes me feel insecure. Well, not exactly," Leonard said.

"Then what is it?"

"It's…It's the way people look at me and her," Leonard said. "When people look at Penny, they smile and wink at her and automatically love her. Then people look at me."

"And how do they look at you?" Anna asked.

"They look at me and they look at her…and they laugh. I've literally seen people laugh at us. Laugh at _me_."

"How does that make you feel?"

"Well, not happy," Leonard said.

"Seriously. How do you feel when you go out and people look at your fiancée and laugh at you?" Anna asked.

"I don't know. I feel…I guess feel like I'm the one doing something wrong," Leonard said. "I feel…I don't know if you'll understand this."

"Give it a try," Anna encouraged.

"Okay. When I was in school, everyone constantly told me that I would never get a girlfriend, that no girl would ever love me," Leonard began. "I was too scrawny, too short, too smart. There was always something wrong with me, something that made girls run from me. After hearing the same thing repeated so many times by so many different people, it becomes pretty easy to believe."

"So you really thought you would never get a girlfriend just because you're smart?" Anna asked.

"I know it sounds kind of dumb, but yeah. I did."

"That doesn't sound dumb at all. The power of suggestion can be a surprisingly strong force," Anna said. "So after years of people telling you that you would never have a girlfriend, it must feel kind of strange to be engaged to a girl who looks like Penny."

"More than kind of," Leonard said. "But it's not just how she looks. It's her personality, too. I always figured if I ever did get a girlfriend, she would be a short, low self-esteemed scientist who's really into _Star Trek _and comic books. For a long time, that was the girl of my dreams."

"Well, I think it's safe to say that Penny is neither short, low self-esteemed, a scientist, nor interested in _Star Trek_ or comic books. She's nothing like the girl of your dreams. So what drew you to her? What made you want to marry her?"

"I don't know exactly," Leonard said. "By all logical thinking, you're right. She's not the girl for me. But there's this feeling where you just _know_. I had that feeling when I first saw her." Leonard exhaled. "Penny…Penny is better than the girl of my dreams."

"Why do you say that?"

"Because even though she's taller than me, extremely confident, hates science, and doesn't understand the appeal of _Star Trek _or comic books…She's just perfect."

"No one's perfect," Anna pointed out.

"Penny is," Leonard insisted.

"Are you perfect?" Anna asked.

"Oh, God, no."

"Really? That's not what Penny says."

"Penny said I'm perfect?" Leonard asked.

"Yes. She said that you're the perfect guy," Anna told him. "If Penny thinks that you're perfect, then why does it matter what other people think of you?"

"It shouldn't. I know it shouldn't. Penny's opinion should be the only one that matters to me. I know all that intellectually. But seeing those people judge us and me…It makes me feel like I did in high school. I never want to feel like that again."

"So how do you think you could fix that?"

"I've thought about this before, more than I care to admit," Leonard said. "I can't change what people do, so I've thought about trying to change myself."

"You and I both know that Penny would kill you if you did that," Anna reminded him.

"I know. That's why I haven't tried it."

"And doesn't that tell you something?"

"What should it tell me?"

"That you don't need to change," Anna said. "Penny fell in love with this you. So do you want my professional advice?"

"Sure."

"Screw who's judging you," Anna said. "Screw the people who stare. Screw the people who laugh. Screw the people in high school who made you feel this way in the first place."

"That's so much easier said than done," Leonard told her.

"That's hard to deny. Sometimes it helps to literally tell the people."

"You're-You're saying that when I start to feel uncomfortable because people are staring at me, I should tell them to stop?" Leonard asked.

"Certainly. How could they know that they're making you uncomfortable unless you tell them so?" Anna said.

"Just the idea of that scares me," Leonard told her, wringing his hands as he darted his eyes back and forth between Anna and the floor.

"Leonard, have you ever talked to a psychologist before?" Anna asked gently.

"No."

"Have you ever considered it?"

"No. Why would I?"

"It's just that it's very clear to me that you have several things going on inside your head that I feel a psychologist might be beneficial to," Anna said.

"Like-Like what?" Leonard wondered.

"The thing that seems to be the most prevalent now is your obvious social anxiety," Anna explained. "One of the biggest diagnostic criteria for social anxiety disorder is fearing judgment by others. You clearly have that."

"When do you think Penny's going to be back?" Leonard asked, tried of having his brain picked.

"I don't want you to feel uncomfortable. I just thought I would give you a possible explanation for something that is having a noticeable impact on you," Anna said. "Just remember that people are going to judge you no matter what. You might as well stay true to yourself for you and for Penny."

"I'm not sure that makes me feel better," Leonard said.

"Then you tell me what you think would," Anna told him. Leonard thought for a few moments before he answered.

"It's bad enough when strangers look at us funny. But when people who Penny considers to be her friends say that we don't belong together…That sucked," Leonard said. "I want Penny's friends to think we're a good match. I don't want to be afraid to tell my father and brother that I'm engaged because I'm scared they'll say the same thing that these people who don't even know us say. So I guess…I guess I would feel better if Penny's friends and my father and brother would accept us."

"That certainly would be ideal. And unfortunately, neither of those things are likely going to happen," Anna said. "People are going to think what they're going to think. You have to learn that what they think doesn't matter. It doesn't make Penny love you any less, does it?"

"I hope not."

"It doesn't make you love Penny any less, right?"

"Of course not."

"Then it doesn't matter," Anna said. "Is it uncomfortable? Absolutely. Hurtful? Maybe. But if it doesn't come between you and Penny, then it just doesn't matter."

"I know. But it still sucks," Leonard said. "I am _nuts_ about Penny. Over the moon, stupid in love with her. I just wish people could see that."

"Leonard, you are the sweetest man in the entire world," Penny said as she burst into the apartment.

"Have you been out there listening the whole time?" Leonard asked.

"Not the whole time. I really did put laundry in."

"But after that?"

"Yeah, the whole time," Penny admitted. She sat down on the couch next to him. "I'm so sorry for what my friends said last night. I don't know what it's like to be teased like you were, but if I had been, I would be devastated if I felt like people were making fun of me again."

"Yeah," Leonard said simply.

"I'm sorry, sweetie. I didn't realize just how anxious going to parties made you."

"I know you love them, but for me…They're terrifying for me," Leonard told her.

"Alright. No more big parties until the wedding reception. Deal?"

"Sounds good to me," Leonard said.

"Alright." Penny gave him a quick kiss. "I love you. Thanks for all of those sweet things you said about me."

"I meant all of it."

"I know you did. You're the first guy I've been with who doesn't say things like that just to get me to have sex with them. You truly mean it. That's one of the reasons why you're so amazing."

Penny and Leonard spent the rest of the evening talking to Anna. While Penny and Anna were chatting away, Leonard was thinking about the conversation he had had with Anna. Somehow, perhaps by realizing the similarities between what was happening then and what had happened to him in high school, he had realized that he didn't want to let those people bother him so much anymore. In school, he had always let the others dominate him, completely get to his head. He was determined not to let that happen again. Penny loved him, no matter what anyone else said.

That was all that mattered.


	19. Chapter 19

With only a few months left before the wedding, Penny was beginning to become very obsessed with the details. While she was eating dinner with Leonard one night, a thought struck her.

"You know what I forgot?" she said.

"What's that?" Leonard asked.

"The honeymoon. How did I forget the honeymoon?"

"Don't worry about that. I've taken that into my own hands," Leonard said.

"Really?" Penny asked. He nodded. "Great! Where are we going?"

"It's a surprise."

"You've got nothing, do you?"

"I have something. I just really want to surprise you," Leonard insisted.

"Okay. I'm sure it'll be great," Penny said with a bright, trusting smile.

**XXX**

"I've got nothing."

Leonard was pacing the floor of his lab. He had explained his plight to Howard and Raj and called them over while they were all at work, searching for advice.

"You've had nearly two months to work on planning your honeymoon and you haven't done anything?" Howard asked.

"She said she wanted to plan everything. I assumed that included the honeymoon!" Leonard said defensively.

"Well, where do you want to go?" Raj asked.

"I don't know. I feel like Penny and I have very different ideas of what a fun vacation looks like," Leonard said.

"What do you mean?" Howard asked.

"I think Penny is the type of person who doesn't want to do anything on vacation except sit on the beach. But I think I would want to go out and, you know, explore the city."

"Wow. Your anthropologist father and psychoanalytical mother really screwed you up," Howard observed.

"Tell me something I don't know," Leonard replied. "But I want to make Penny happy more than anything. Where do you think she would want to go?"

"Maybe you should take her somewhere really romantic, like Paris," Raj suggested.

"She does like romantic," Leonard said thoughtfully.

"I know where you want to go," Howard said.

"Where's that?"

"Innsbruck, Austria."

"Howard, be helpful," Leonard said.

"Why isn't that helpful? I've heard that Austria is beautiful," Raj said.

"He's only saying that because I told him I want to go to Innsbruck because they just cooled Bose-Einstein condensates with lasers for the first time in history there," Leonard explained. "I'm not taking Penny to Austria to check out a physics breakthrough on our honeymoon. She would kill me."

"She really would," Raj agreed. "Okay, what about Italy? Italy is romantic."

"But there's too much to do in Italy."

"You said you wanted to be able to explore the city, learn about the culture," Howard reminded him.

"Yeah, but I don't care about what I want. I just want Penny to be happy, and I don't think she wants to learn about culture and history on her honeymoon," Leonard said.

"Well, you know her better than anyone else. What do you think Penny wants to do?" Howard asked.

"I don't know," Leonard said. "I feel like she would want to do nothing, but I also think she would get bored if we did nothing for the entire time."

"Gee. What a quandary," Raj commented. "You could go to India. I'm sure my parents would let you stay with them for free."

"I am not taking Penny to India to stay at your parents' house," Leonard said firmly.

"Take her to Vegas. Hell, don't even have a ceremony. Just go to one of those stupid wedding chapels and tie the knot there," Howard said. Leonard only looked at him. "Okay, bad idea."

"What about Mexico? I hear Cancun is nice," Raj said.

"No, Mexico scares Penny. She watches too many of those drug cartel shows," Leonard said, now deep in thought.

"Australia?" Howard offered.

"No. Penny was watching Animal Planet one day and heard the story of that little girl who got eaten by a dingo. Now she doesn't want anything to do with Australia," Leonard said.

"What about China? Beijing would keep you busy," Howard said.

"No. Penny was watching a documentary about China, and she saw their bathrooms. She's sworn off Asia." Howard and Raj stared at Leonard. "Penny watches too much TV."

"I know this isn't exactly exotic, but what about Napa? Penny loves wine," Raj suggested.

"If we went to Napa, I don't know if she would ever stop looking for free samples."

"You're shooting down all of our ideas, but I haven't heard you offer up anything," Howard pointed out.

"I think somewhere tropical," Leonard said slowly, deep in thought.

"Hawaii? Very romantic," Raj said.

"But while Penny loves romance, she also loves originality. I just don't feel like Hawaii is that original," Leonard said. "I told her it's a big surprise. Now I have to live up to that."

"Well, that was just stupid. Half-assing it is always the way to go," Howard told him.

"I can't half-ass this. It's the only thing I'm doing for the wedding besides showing up. I have to get it right," Leonard said.

"Have you ever seen those over-water bungalows, Leonard?" Raj asked. Leonard shook his head. Raj took out his phone and found a picture on the Internet.

"Wow. That's amazing," Leonard said when he saw the bungalows suspended above clear, turquoise water.

"What woman could hate _that_?" Raj said.

"Penny would love something like that," Leonard agreed. "Where are these things?"

"Uh, Fiji, Tahiti, Bora Bora—"

"Bora Bora. That seems kind of unique, and it has those bungalow things. What do you think about that?" Leonard asked.

"I think if you've got money coming out of the orifice of your choosing, it's a great idea," Howard said.

"Are they expensive?"

"I looked into it for Bernadette. They're ridiculous, and then you have to add plane tickets and food and you know how girls like to shop."

"Well…Penny's parents are paying for the wedding, and I do have a lot of money saved up," Leonard said thoughtfully, trying to figure out how he could make this happen.

"I think you should do it, Leonard. It's perfect," Raj encouraged.

"Alright. It's been decided. I am going to take Penny to Bora Bora," Leonard said confidently. Now he just had to find a way to make it work.

**XXX**

While Penny was working the dinner shift at The Cheesecake Factory that evening, Leonard was sitting in the living room crunching numbers, trying to figure out how he could make a honeymoon to Bora Bora work out economically. While he had all sorts of financial documents spread out on the couch and coffee table, he heard the door open and Penny walk in.

"Hey, why aren't you at work?" he asked as he scrambled to gather the papers.

"Well, after I had a six year old grab my hair and nearly slam my head on the table, an elderly woman spill her glass of wine on my crotch, and dropped a whole tray of food, I reached that point where suicide seemed to be a better option than finishing my shift, so I faked puking in the bathroom and my manager told me not to come back for three days. Everybody wins," Penny explained as she threw her purse on the floor and slumped onto the couch next to Leonard. "Have I ever told you how much I hate my job?"

"You've mentioned it once or twice," Leonard said.

"Good. Because I hate it. I hate serving annoying people like that and hardly getting any money in return. I hate it, Leonard. I have hatred in my heart. Thankfully, I know the cure."

"What's that?"

"Wine. Lots and lots of wine," Penny told him. She got up, poured herself a glass, then sat back down. "Anyway, enough bitching. What are you doing?"

"Nothing."

"What's this?" Penny asked as she picked up the stack of papers on the table. She quickly scanned it then turned to Leonard, her eyes wide.

"Sweetie, is this what I think it is?" she asked.

"Well, that depends on what you think it is," Leonard replied.

"Is this your paycheck from the university?"

"Oh. In that case, yes."

"Leonard…You see more money in a year than I've ever seen in my life!" Penny exclaimed.

"It-It's really not that much. It's not what medical doctors make."

"Screw what doctors make! A hundred and twenty grand a year?! Why are you living with Sheldon?!"

"Well, now I'm living with you," Leonard pointed out.

"You know what I mean. Seriously, if you've been making that much for ten some years and _splitting_ an apartment, you must have a ton saved up."

"Yeah, actually, I do," Leonard said, pulling the papers out of her hands.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Penny wondered.

"Why does it matter?"

"Well, it didn't, but now that we're engaged, it does."

"I don't understand why," Leonard said. "You know why I lived with Sheldon? Because it was all I needed. Money has never mattered to me. I hardly looked at the salary when I was offered the job. All I've ever cared about is the science. The thrill is in developing new theories and having them read by other scientists, not the paycheck."

"That's great. I love that you love what you do so much. But you can't honestly tell me that the money doesn't excite you at all," Penny said.

"I guess it's a plus, but I don't know if 'excite' is the word I would use," Leonard said.

"Seriously, Leonard. Why didn't you tell me this? I was under the impression that physicists are like…I don't know…cops," Penny said.

"Physicists are like cops?" Leonard asked. Penny nodded. "Yeah, I'm not sure I understand that analogy."

"Really underpaid," Penny explained.

"There are more cops than there are physicists, which is why they get paid less. Well, in addition to the fact that earning a position as a physicist at a university requires post-doctoral training and a very specific skill set."

"I'm aware of all that, honey. Now stop avoiding my question," Penny said.

"What was your question?"

"Why didn't you ever tell me that you make so much? _And_, why are you so hesitant to answer that question?"

"You never asked and it never came up. That's it," Leonard said.

"Then why didn't you just say that?" Penny asked. Leonard looked down towards the floor. "Is this about what those girls said the other night?" He kept his eyes down. "Leonard." He still said nothing. "Sweetie, hasn't it been very well established that those girls are idiots?"

"They're your friends. They know you," Leonard said quietly.

"They know high school me. They don't know current me," Penny told him. "You're not actually afraid that I'll think any differently of you now that I know how much you make, right?"

"No. I don't know."

"Which is it?"

"It's…" Leonard sighed. "Why did those girls assume that you were marrying me for money?"

"Because they're just like everyone else who thinks we aren't right for each other."

"But it sounded like you had talked about it before."

"Yes, while in high school in rural Nebraska. _Everyone_ wanted to marry rich so they didn't end up living on a farm for the rest of their lives," Penny told him. "You know, most guys can't wait to tell a girl how much he makes to impress her. If you were so desperate to get me to like you, why didn't you ever play that card?"

"Would it have worked?" Leonard wondered.

"I don't know. Why?" Penny asked, worried she had said something wrong when she saw Leonard's disappointed face.

"Because I don't think money matters, and you obviously do," he said. "I didn't tell you exactly because of that. I didn't want you to like me for money. As much of a long shot it seemed to be at the time, I wanted you to like _me_. Now you're telling me that I would have been more appealing to you from the beginning if you had known how much I make?"

"No, that's not what I'm saying," Penny protested.

"It's exactly what you're saying. You're more excited to marry me now that you know how much I make. Don't you see why that would hurt me?"

"Sweetie, I didn't mean—"

"You know what? Forget it. I should just be thankful that you want to marry me at all." Leonard stood up and grabbed his keys.

"Leonard, where are you going?" Penny asked, feeling horrible.

"I don't know. I just want to think." Leonard walked out the door and shut it behind him. Penny sighed as she leaned back against the couch. Wanting to talk through what had just happened, she grabbed her phone and called Anna back in Nebraska.

"Hey, Penny," she said upon answering.

"I think I just royally screwed up," Penny told her.

"Oh, no. What happened?"

"As if he didn't already feel insecure," Penny groaned.

"Penny, what happened?" Anna asked.

"I just made Leonard feel like I really am only wanting to marry him for money," Penny said miserably.

"How did you do that?"

"I figured out how much he makes, and I guess I got a little too excited about it," Penny explained. "I feel like I may have undone half of the progress you made with him."

"What do you mean, you got a little too excited?" Anna wondered.

"You've gotta understand, I've worked as a waitress my entire life. I've never made more than twenty grand in a year," Penny explained. "I find out that my fiancé makes a hundred thousand dollars more than I do? Wouldn't you be kind of excited?"

"Wow. Physicists make a hundred and twenty grand?" Anna said. "Well, I guess there really aren't that many of them."

"So you get what I'm saying?"

"Yes, I understand why you would be excited. But I can also see why Leonard would be hurt," Anna told her. "The only thing Leonard wants in the entire world is for you to love him for him. No one else ever has. It makes sense that he would be a little offended if you acted like he was an even better fiancé because he makes a lot of money."

"So what do I do now? I feel _terrible_," Penny asked desperately.

"It's a tricky situation you've put yourself in," Anna said. "If I were you, I'd find a way to prove to him that money doesn't matter to you."

"That's it? You don't have any psychological mind tricks I can use to make him forgive me and still feel good about himself?"

"I'm a psychologist, Penny, not a wizard," Anna told her. "You know him better than anyone. What do you think?"

"You wanna know what I think?"

"What?"

"I think I'm screwed."


	20. Chapter 20

While Penny was sorting through the scene with Anna, Leonard decided—somewhat against his better judgment—that he would try to talk it out with Sheldon, like he would before he got engaged. He crossed the hall and knocked on the door.

"Leonard. This is a nice surprise," Sheldon said when he opened it.

"Hey, Sheldon. Can I come in?" Leonard asked.

"Certainly." Sheldon stepped to the side and let Leonard enter the apartment. "Can I get you anything?"

"Sheldon, just because we don't live together anymore doesn't mean you have to treat me like we're meeting for the first time," Leonard said as he flopped onto the couch.

"You seem distressed," Sheldon observed as he joined him in his spot.

"I am distressed."

"Should I ask why?"

"Because Penny found out how much money I make, and now she's even more excited to marry me."

"I'm no expert, but I'm fairly certain that's a good thing," Sheldon said after a minute of consideration.

"Not if it's for the wrong reasons," Leonard told him. "For the last seven years, I've actively made sure that she didn't know that."

"Why do you care?" Sheldon wondered.

"Because I didn't want to her want to date me because I have a good salary. I wanted her to date me because she liked me," Leonard explained.

"But either way, she's dating you. Why does the motive matter?" Sheldon asked.

"Because I don't want to be her sugar daddy, that's why."

"I'm not familiar with that phrase, but you are neither made of sugar nor are you Penny's father," Sheldon replied.

"Alright, this was a mistake. I should go," Leonard said as he began to stand.

"Leonard, wait," Sheldon said.

"What?"

"Penny isn't going to break up with you over this, is she?" Sheldon asked.

"Why would she?"

"Are you going to break up with Penny?"

"As if I would be capable of breaking up with Penny, even if I wanted to," Leonard said, earning a confused look from Sheldon. "No, I am not going to break up with Penny. Why do you ask?"

"Because I'm afraid that if for whatever reason your engagement failed after coming so close to finally being able to have coitus within wedlock, you wouldn't be okay," Sheldon told him.

"You're right. I wouldn't be okay," Leonard said with a sigh as he sat back down.

"Penny isn't upset with you. In fact, Penny is happy. I don't understand why you're so distressed by her having knowledge of your salary," Sheldon said.

"I'm not sure I really know why I'm so distressed by it, either," Leonard said honestly. "It wasn't seeing her so excited that bothered me. She doesn't make a lot; it must be strange to realize she doesn't have to worry about paying bills anymore. It was when she asked me why I hadn't told her when I was trying to get her to date me. She essentially said she would have been more attracted to me in the beginning if she had known that I make a lot of money."

"Every woman is like that," Sheldon said.

"I think that's kind of an unjust generalization, but okay," Leonard said, not feeling any better.

"Every man is like that, too. Look at Wolowitz. He was greatly attracted to Bernadette partially because of the substantially larger salary she receives," Sheldon pointed out. "I don't think this is anything incredibly groundbreaking, Leonard. I believe it's human nature to desire to have a wealthy mate."

"So you think I'm wrong to be upset by this?" Leonard asked.

"I'll admit that I'm not an expert, but yes, I do," Sheldon said. Before Leonard could respond, there was a knock on the door. Without waiting for a reply, the door opened and Penny stuck her head in.

"Hi. Sorry, I-I was going to look for you and I heard your voice in the hall," she said. "Is it okay if I come in?"

"Yeah," Leonard told her.

"Excuse me. You no longer live here. You don't get to decide who is welcome," Sheldon said.

"Do I have _your_ permission to enter, _Sheldon_?" Penny asked, fighting the urge to roll her eyes.

"Since you have upset Leonard, I will defer the decision to him," Sheldon said. Leonard didn't bother to conceal his eye roll.

"Yes, Penny. Come in," he said. Penny closed the door behind her and sat down in the chair beside the couch.

"Listen, sweetie, I'm really sorry. I honestly wasn't trying to hurt your feelings. I've just never seen so much money in my life. It was a big surprise," Penny said. "It took a lot of thought, but I think I found a way to prove to you that I couldn't care less about how much you make."

"What's that?" Leonard asked.

"Despite what I now know, even once we're married and everything's coming out of the same pot…I will not quit my job at The Cheesecake Factory," Penny declared.

"Really?" Leonard asked, genuinely surprised. Penny nodded. "But you hate it there."

"That's _very_ true. But I'd rather work there for the rest of my life than have even a part of you think I'm marrying you for money," Penny told him.

"That means a lot to me, Penny. It really does. But while I _really_ don't want that, I also don't want you to keep working at a job you hate when you don't have to," Leonard told her.

"Then I'll quit and find another job, or I'll go back to school, or maybe both. No matter what, I'm not going to idly sit at home living off of the money you're earning by discovering how the universe works. Maybe I can quit and find a job even a little bit as cool as that."

"You know, you're the first girl who's ever told me that my job is cool," Leonard said.

"Well, not _that_ kind of cool. But still very cool," Penny said, making Leonard smile a bit. "I'm really sorry, sweetie. Really."

"I know you are. And don't feel _so_ bad. I might have overreacted a little bit," Leonard admitted.

"I don't think so. Not for you," Penny told him. "I am very well aware that why I want to marry you is something you still don't completely understand, which, by the way, is absolutely tragic to me. I understand why my reaction hurt you."

"Don't worry about it. It's all good," Leonard said.

"Positive?" Penny asked. Leonard nodded. "Good. So what were you doing when I walked in, anyway?"

"I was trying to plan the honeymoon," Leonard told her.

"Oh, now I feel even worse. I made you feel all bad when you were trying to do something great," Penny said.

"It's okay, really. You are more than forgiven," Leonard assured her.

"Good," Penny said, smiling at him. "So do I get any hints about where we're going?"

"Not one," Leonard said, making her pout. "You are not going to know where we're going until we're boarding the plane."

"Alright, alright. I'm dying of curiosity, but alright," Penny told him. "So do you want to hang with Sheldon for awhile, or do you want to go back to our place and watch some TV? Or whatever else might happen."

"Thanks for talking with me, Sheldon, but I've got to go," Leonard said.

"It's just as well. I was very busy when you came," Sheldon replied.

"Working on some new, brilliant theory?" Penny asked.

"Truthfully, no. I was just about to level up in World of Warcraft," Sheldon said.

"Well, we certainly wouldn't want to interrupt that. We'll see you later." Penny took Leonard's hand, hauled him off the couch, and headed out the door.


	21. Chapter 21

A few weeks passed uneventfully. The wedding was getting closer and closer, and Leonard and Penny were getting more and more excited. However, Leonard noticed that for about a week, Penny's excitement was presenting itself more as anxiety. Finally, during a silent dinner at home, Leonard decided to confront her about it.

"Are you okay?" he asked. Penny looked up from her food and met his eyes.

"What?" she asked.

"I asked if you're okay. You've been acting kind of weird all week."

"Weird? What do you mean, weird?"

"You've just been really quiet, and we both know that you are not a quiet girl. So what gives?" Leonard asked. Penny paused for a few minutes, then sighed and threw her fork on the plate.

"Leonard…I've been trying to find a way to tell you this forever, but I just couldn't think of the right way to say it," Penny said.

"Say what?" Leonard asked, perplexed.

"You remember when I said I faked puking to get out of work a few weeks ago?" Penny asked. Leonard nodded. "I lied. It wasn't fake."

"You really threw up?" Leonard asked. Penny nodded. "Are you sick?"

"In a way," Penny said reluctantly. "You could say that I have a…parasite growing inside me."

"A parasite?" Leonard asked. Penny nodded. "Did a doctor tell you this?" She nodded again. "On the Internet or in person?"

"It was a human."

"Well, can you do anything about it?"

"Um, according to the doctor, only for about a month or so. After that, it becomes illegal to take it out," Penny told him.

"Illegal?" Leonard asked, truly confused.

"But, according to the doctor, a lot of people will grow attached to these parasites," Penny said, beginning to ramble. "Apparently, people like to name them, dress them up, arrange playdates with other parasites—"

"Penny?"

"Yes?"

"This is the most convoluted way to tell someone you're pregnant that I've ever heard," Leonard said, his face blank.

"You're really smart," Penny said quietly after a few moments.

"Yeah, I'm a genius," Leonard said sarcastically. "How long have you know about this?"

"Um, about two weeks now," Penny said hesitantly.

"Two weeks?! You've known that you're pregnant for _two weeks_ and you haven't told me?!" Leonard exclaimed.

"I'm sorry! I've been so freaked out for the last two weeks about being pregnant in the first place, and trying to think of how to tell you. We've never talked about kids before. I didn't know if you would be happy or not."

"Well, are you happy?" Leonard asked.

"I don't know. I'm…I'm scared," Penny told him. "I mean…Do you want kids?"

"I mean, I think I do. I don't know if I want kids now, but if it's going to happen, it's going to happen. What about you?"

"I have no idea. I always told myself that I didn't, but like you said, now that I don't have a choice…I don't know."

"Well, we've got nine months to figure things out," Leonard said, trying to sound reassuring. But Penny still looked distressed.

"I'm not sure a year would be enough time."


	22. Chapter 22

Another two weeks had passed since Penny had announced her pregnancy to Leonard, making her six weeks pregnant. Penny and Leonard had yet to tell their friends or families about their surprise; they wanted to have some time to fully digest the information themselves before they shared it with others.

Now that she was six weeks in, the doctor had told Penny to come in for her first ultrasound. Leonard took time off work to accompany her, not wanting her to be alone when she was still very shaken by the news.

"I can't believe I'm sitting here," Penny said to Leonard as they were sitting in the waiting room.

"I know you're freaked out, Penny. I am, too. But you've got to relax, okay? We can handle one kid. I know we can," Leonard told her, trying to be comforting. But Penny's anxiety was not dissipating.

"Penny?" the nurse called as she stepped out from the back. They stood up and followed her into the office until they reached the exam room. They waited another ten minutes before her entered.

"Hi, Penny. It's been awhile since you've been here," she said as she sat down in front of the computer screen.

"Well, I've never been too great at keeping my life under control," Penny said.

"I take it this wasn't a planned pregnancy?" the doctor asked cautiously.

"Not exactly," Leonard said. "I'm Leonard, Penny's fiancé."

"Nice to meet you, Leonard. I'm Dr. Mason," she said. "Could you lie down and lift up your shirt for me, Penny?" Penny complied without saying anything. Dr. Mason squeezed some gel on her stomach, then began to search inside her.

"Ah, there's the baby. Oh. That's interesting," Dr. Mason said after a few minutes.

"What's interesting?" Penny asked.

"I'm not sure how you'll take this, but congratulations. You're having twins," Dr. Mason announced. Penny and Leonard stared at her for a good thirty seconds, then Penny burst out laughing.

"That's really funny. I'm sure you pull that all the time," she said.

"Uh, Penny? I can see two," Leonard said, looking at the screen.

"No, you can't," Penny said.

"Yeah, I can."

"No, you can't," Penny said again, her face falling as she started to realize that maybe this wasn't a joke. Dr. Mason turned the screen so Penny could see.

"Look. One, two," she said, pointing out each growing baby with her index finger. Penny's mouth dropped open.

"Um, excuse me, but are you fucking kidding me?!" Penny practically screamed.

"Penny, chill. It'll still be fine," Leonard said, though inside, he was freaking out himself.

"We're having _two_ kids when we didn't even want to have _one_, Leonard!" Penny put her hand over her eyes.

"Um, should I leave you two alone for a few minutes?" Dr. Mason asked.

"That might be a good idea," Leonard told her.

"Okay. I'll be back in a bit to finish." Dr. Mason stood up and left the room. Leonard took her chair and rolled it over towards Penny.

"Penny, listen to me," Leonard said, trying to sound soothing. "I know this situation seems absolutely insane, and it's hard to deny that it isn't. But that doesn't mean it's a bad situation." Penny didn't respond. "Tell me what you're thinking."

"I don't think I could begin to tell you what I'm thinking," Penny said. "I thinking about the wedding, I'm thinking about the honeymoon, I'm thinking about how we're going to have to find a house, I'm thinking about how different our life is going to be from what I imagined."

"Okay, one thing at a time. What are you thinking about the wedding?"

"I'm thinking I can't drink to celebrate. I'm thinking I ordered a dress in a size that I highly doubt I'll be able to fit into if I'm pregnant with twins."

"Then we just won't drink at the wedding. No big deal," Leonard said. "As for the dress, the wedding is in a few weeks. I can't imagine that you would be showing _that_ much by then. And even if you are, that's what alterations are for."

"They can always make dresses smaller, Leonard, but they can't always make dresses bigger," Penny informed him.

"Okay, worst case scenario, you find a new dress. Could be worse, right?"

"I just wish if this had to happen, that it would have happened after the honeymoon." Penny groaned. "And how are we supposed to go on a honeymoon? Don't they say that pregnant women shouldn't fly?"

"Yeah, they do, but don't worry about it. I haven't officially booked anything yet. We'll just go when things settle down a bit. Nothing ventured, nothing gained," Leonard said.

"Leonard, we're having _two children_. Things never settle down once you have two children. We're gonna be one of those couples who never get a honeymoon 'cause they got knocked up. Oh, my God. People are going to think that I only married you because you got me pregnant! As if people were questioning it enough!"

"Penny, relax. Even if it doesn't happen for a few years, I promise, we will have a honeymoon. And I'm finally starting to realize that it doesn't matter why people think we're getting married. We know the real reason, and that's all that matters, okay?" Leonard asked. Penny nodded. "Okay. What else is bothering you?"

"Well, we can't raise two kids in my apartment. At some point in the next nine months, we're going to have to find a house."

"That's fine. Nine months is plenty of time to find a house," Leonard told her.

"It's not the finding the house part. It's not even the money part. It's the part where I actually have to face what's happening right now," Penny said.

"I don't understand."

"By buying a house, it makes the fact that I'm committing myself to someone forever very, very real," Penny said.

"Is the fact that you're committing yourself to me forever a bad thing?" Leonard asked.

"No, it's not a bad thing. It's a great thing. But that kind of commitment to me is like going to big parties for you. It's absolutely terrifying," Penny explained. Leonard began to open his mouth, but she stopped him. "No, don't say anything. I don't want you to overthink what I just said. I don't regret saying yes _at all_. I really want to make this commitment. But that doesn't mean it's not scary."

"I'll admit that I'm not sure I understand why this is so scary for you…but I guess you don't understand why parties are scary to me."

"No, I don't. Now we're even," Penny said. "The only thing is, when I said yes, I kind of had a certain vision in my head of what our life together would look like, and it was really plausible. But now that I'm pregnant with freaking _twins_, that vision is completely gone. Now I have no idea what the future is going to look like."

"Well, you've never been one to oppose spontaneity," Leonard said. "When you were taking me on that wild prom night, you told me that life is more fun if you sit back, relax, and enjoy the ride. You said you can't plan every aspect of life. Sometimes you have to let the universe decide what happens next."

"That was, like, a month ago. I can't believe you remember that," Penny said.

"I remember everything you say to me," Leonard told her.

Penny smiled. "You know what makes this whole situation a little less scary?"

"What's that?"

"The fact that I'm going through it with you," she told him, making Leonard smile. "What's also really great is that you're these twins' father and not Zack."

"Yeah, that is a plus," Leonard said.

"You know, they're going to be half you. That means at least one of them will be a genius. Or both of them. Or half of one of them," Penny said.

"You have a fabulous understanding of the passing of phenotypic traits," Leonard said with a joking smile.

"I'm not sure I know what that means, but it sounded like a compliment," Penny said. "Should I be excited or sad that there's a possibility my kid could be smarter than me?"

"I think you should just keep focusing on how I am a much better mate than Zack," Leonard encouraged.

"Okay," Penny laughed as she sat up to kiss Leonard. Forgetting about the gel spread over her stomach, she ended up spreading it onto her pants. "Aw, damn it. I just bought these."

"Well, in nine months, there's going to be a whole lot of goo down there, so get used to it," Leonard told her.

"Very funny," Penny said with a small smile. "Alright. I'm calm now. Would you go get Dr. Mason? I want to ask her if she can tell me if they're boys or girls."

"She won't be able to tell. You're only six weeks pregnant. A baby's gender can only be identified at fourteen weeks at a minimum," Leonard informed her.

"You don't just know physics, you know baby stuff, too? Hell, what am I paying a doctor for?" Penny said.

"I have a basic understanding of heredity and gestation. That doesn't mean I should deliver the babies," Leonard told her.

"Of course not. You would pass out the second you saw their goopy heads," Penny replied.

"Very funny," Leonard said.

"Two can play this game. Go get the doctor, I want to get out of here," Penny instructed. Leonard nodded and went out into the hallway. Penny exhaled as she looked down at her gooey stomach, wondering what changes the two living beings inside it would bring.


	23. Chapter 23

After letting the information sink in for another week, Penny decided that she had no choice but tell her parents about her pregnancy. She paced the floor of her living room anxiously with her cell phone in hand.

"I can't believe I'm proving her right," she said.

"You're not proving her right. You weren't pregnant when we actually got engaged," Leonard pointed out.

"So you think she'll be okay with it? Of course she'll be okay with it. She has to be okay with it. She had Carter when she was seventeen. How could she judge me?"

"Penny?"

"Yeah?"

"You're just making yourself more nervous. Call her," Leonard told her. Penny nodded, sat on the couch with him, then called her mother, putting her on speakerphone. After a few rings, she picked up.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Mom, it's Penny."

"Oh, Penny! We're so excited to come to California next week for the wedding! Wyatt, come here! It's Penny! Let's see, Katie Anne showed me a button that makes it so you can hear her, too…"

"It's that one," Wyatt said in the background.

"No, Wyatt, that says mute! Let's see…What's a FaceTime?"

"Okay, Mom—"

"Oh, oh, oh, wait! Here it is!" Mary said excitedly. "Okay, can you hear us?"

"Yes, Mom," Penny said with an exasperated sigh.

"Good! We can't wait to get out to Pasadena and see you and Leonard again!"

"I can't wait to give my little girl away in a pretty white dress!" Wyatt said happily.

"Yeah, about that…"

"Oh, Penny. I'm so sorry," Mary said.

"What?" Penny asked, confused.

"I'm flying out to California, anyway. I'll teach him not to hurt my little girl," Wyatt said dangerously.

"Who are we talking about?" Penny asked.

"Leonard, of course. I'll show him that in the country, when someone wrongs a daughter, daddy shoots. And _not_ to wound."

"No, no, Dad, no!" Penny said quickly. "We didn't break up, Dad."

"Oh, thank heavens! You'll never meet anyone that great again," Mary said.

"Yeah, thanks," Penny said as she rolled her eyes. "Anyway, I have some different news for you."

"What's that?" Mary asked.

"Well, um…Leonard and I, we…Oh, screw it. I'm pregnant."

"You're pregnant?" Mary asked after a few beats.

"Yes. With twins," Penny said, effectively quieting both of her parents. "Okay, please say something."

"What's the big deal?" Wyatt asked.

"I'm sorry, what?" Penny said. "What's the big deal about me being pregnant with twins?"

"Of course _that's_ a big deal. We're very happy for you," Mary said. "Your father just meant, what's the big deal about telling us?"

"How about the fact that when you assumed I was pregnant when I told you I'm engaged, you wanted to shoot Leonard?" Penny said.

"That was when we thought he was another go-nowhere loser, honey, like you've always dated," Mary explained. "Now that we know that Leonard is an intelligent, responsible, _employed_ man, why wouldn't we be happy for you?"

"Really?" Penny asked.

"Of course."

"Dad?"

"I like Leonard. I don't have any concerns that he'll cheat on you, or leave you, or have warrants catch up with him. He'll be a good father," Wyatt said.

"That makes me really happy, Dad. Thank you," Penny said, smiling.

"Are you still having the wedding next week, or are you going to wait?" Mary asked.

"We're still getting married next week," Penny told her. "We're going to tell our friends later today, and tomorrow, Amy and Bernadette are going to go with me to see if my dress still fits."

"Are you showing much?" Mary wondered.

"Not really."

"Well, if you're anything like your mother, you'll be as big as a house. Maybe a barn; I never had two in me at once."

"Thanks, Mom. That makes me feel great," Penny said dully. "Anyway, our friends should be here soon. I just wanted to let you know you're going to be grandparents times two."

"Thank you for telling us! We're so excited for you two and can't wait to see you!" Mary said happily.

"We'll see you next week, Penny Rose," Wyatt said.

"Sounds good. Bye." Penny ended the call and exhaled the breath she had been holding since she had dialed the number.

"See? That wasn't so bad, was it?" Leonard said.

"Besides the fact that it's now more likely to them that I broke off the engagement than I got pregnant, it was perfect," Penny said, her voice tinged with sarcasm.

"Oh, whatever. It went really well."

"Yeah, I guess it did. How do you think your mom is gonna take it?" Penny wondered.

"I wasn't planning on telling her, at least not any time soon," Leonard said.

"Are you kidding me? She's going to be here next week for the wedding. You can't honestly tell me that you're going to look into your mother in the eyes and not tell her that your wife is pregnant with twins," Penny said.

"Alright, alright, I'll tell her. But I'm going to wait until she gets in town. We're going to be telling enough people today," Leonard said. "Come on. Everyone's going to be here in twenty minutes."

Penny and Leonard spent the next twenty minutes attempting to straighten up the apartment. The task had become easier since Leonard had moved in and started to organize things, but Penny's habitual messiness still took them right up until they got their first knock on the door.

"Penny and Leonard." Knock, knock, knock. "Penny and Leonard." Knock, knock, knock. "Penny and Leonard."

"I'll get it," Leonard said as he moved towards the door.

"Hello, Leonard," Sheldon greeted him.

"Hey, Sheldon. Come in," Leonard said as he saw Howard and Bernadette rounding the corner of the stairs, shortly followed by Raj and Amy. Once everyone was seated, Penny and Leonard stood at the front of the room, ready to make the announcement.

"So what's the big news? I can't think of anything bigger than you guys getting engaged," Howard said.

"Well, you're wrong," Penny said. "So, about three weeks ago, I found out some pretty big, unexpected news."

"I think I could guess where this is going," Bernadette said slowly.

"Yeah, and you'd be right," Penny said.

"I don't understand how you could begin to guess what she's going to say. Most news is unexpected. For all we know, she's telling us that someone died, or one of them has been diagnosed with a terminal illness," Sheldon said.

"No, none of that, Sheldon. What I'm trying to say is that three weeks ago…I found out that I'm pregnant," Penny announced.

"Wow. That is big news," Amy commented.

"Yes, and it gets bigger. As it turns out, there's not just one baby. There's two," Penny told them. Everyone's mouths dropped open. "Okay, you all better shut that. You're gonna get flies in there."

"We're sorry. It's just…quite a surprise," Howard said.

"Yeah, you're telling me," Penny replied.

"How far along are you?" Amy asked.

"Seven weeks."

"So that makes your due date in October?" Howard said after a quick calculation.

"Yep. Sometime around October fifth."

"And now a more important question: how are you two handling the news?" Bernadette asked.

"I was pretty freaked out. I'm _still_ freaked out. I mean, to say this is not what I expected the beginning our life together would look like is a _huge_ understatement," Penny said. "Leonard's keeping me calm, though."

"What about you, Leonard?" Bernadette asked.

"It was the biggest shock I've ever had, but it's what's happening," Leonard said simply. He didn't want to admit in front of Penny that he was scared shitless.

"Do you know if they're boys or girls?" Raj wondered.

"Not yet. It takes a few more weeks until they can tell," Leonard explained.

"Well, you should probably start working on names, because knowing you two, you could fight about it for the whole nine months," Howard said.

"Oh, shit. We have to name them, don't we?" Penny said, as if this was a shocking revelation.

"Traditionally, yes, parents give their children names," Leonard told her.

"I'm aware of that. I just didn't think about naming them until he said it. And he's right. We could fight about it for nine months."

"We don't have to think about it right now, though. All we have to think about right now is the wedding next week," Leonard said. "One thing at a time, okay?"

"Leonard. I have two creatures growing inside me. They're going to be on my mind," Penny told him. "But you are right. One thing at a time."

"So you guys are still going to have the wedding next week?" Amy asked.

"Definitely. I don't want to wait anymore," Penny said. "That reminds me. Would you and Bernadette want to come to the dress store with me tomorrow? I have to see if my dress still fits."

"We'd love to," Bernadette told her.

"Well, even though this isn't very timely, it still calls for celebration, right?" Howard said cheerfully. "Penny, where's your wine?"

"I threw it all out so I wouldn't be tempted," Penny said, glaring at him.

"Oh. Have you finally taken the first step?"

"Excuse me?"

"You know. The first step is admitting that you have a problem," Howard said.

"I am _not_ an alcoholic, Howard, I am _pregnant_. You can't drink when you're pregnant!" Penny exclaimed.

"Oh, really?" Howard asked. Penny just rolled her eyes. "Damn, these next nine months are gonna suck for you."

"I've never wanted alcohol this badly before in my life," Penny muttered to Leonard before she went to the fridge to get a bottle of water.

"And here come the hormones," Howard said just loudly enough for everyone but Penny to hear. Leonard rolled his eyes, but he couldn't help but wonder, double the children, double the hormones: how crazy would Penny get?


	24. Chapter 24

The next day, Penny met Amy and Bernadette at the bridal salon where she had purchased her unexpected dream dress months before. They were directed down the stairs to the alternations floor. After waiting for a few minutes, a cheerful young woman approached them.

"Hi, are you Penny?" she asked. Penny nodded. "Nice to meet you. I'm Claire. Are you ready to try your dress on?"

"Nervous, but ready," Penny told her. "These are my friends, Amy and Bernadette."

"Pleased to meet you. If you ladies would follow me." Claire led the three women further into the alterations floor. They left Bernadette and Amy sitting on a couch and entered a dressing room just across the hall. Claire returned after a few minutes carrying a black garment bag.

"Alright, Penny. Ready to catch your first glimpse at yourself as a bride?" she asked as she unzipped the bag.

"Yeah, very ready. Um, before we start, I feel like I should mention that I recently found out I'm pregnant with twins."

"Oh. Um…congratulations?" Claire said a bit uncertainly.

"Yeah, thanks. My point is, if this dress doesn't fit and I start crying, it's because my life is quickly descending into chaos. Nothing to worry about," Penny said hastily.

"Oh. Good to know," Claire said. "Um, this is the part where you take your clothes off and put on the dress."

"Right, right." Penny began to undress by removing her shirt.

"Oh," Claire said when Penny's stomach was revealed.

"Yeah, it-it's a little bit bigger than it was when I ordered the dress," Penny said with a nervous smile.

"I-I'm sure we can figure something out," Claire told her, trying to seem encouraging. Once Penny was undressed, Claire helped her step into the ballgown. She managed to get the zipper halfway up before it got stuck.

"I don't hear you zipping. Why aren't you zipping?" Penny asked.

"Don't-Don't worry. I think I can get it," Claire said.

"Damn these designers. So inconsiderate towards multi-pregnant women," Penny said, trying to make herself laugh so she wouldn't break down.

"That is their prime market. Um, could you try to suck it in a bit?"

"I have been since you first started."

"Oh. Well, hang on." Claire continued to tug and pull on the dress. Penny had resigned herself to thinking that the dress of her dreams wasn't going to fit. She started to think of where she could get another dress that would fit her with the wedding a week away and how she would pay for it…

"Got it!" Claire said victoriously as she finishing zipping the dress.

"You got it?!" Penny asked, smiling broadly.

"I got it zipped. Can you breathe?"

"Well enough. Sorry, babies, but you're going to be a little smashed together for a few hours," Penny said, grinning as she looked at herself in the mirror. "Wow. It's perfect."

"Do you want to show your friends?" Claire asked. Penny nodded and headed out of the dressing room with her. Amy and Bernadette both gasped when they saw her walking out.

"You like it?" Penny asked.

"Yes. But we were gasping at the fact that you fit into it," Amy told her.

"Amy, shh! We love it, Penny. You look fantastic," Bernadette told Penny.

"Do you think Leonard will like it?" Penny wondered.

"Penny, as long as you're the one meeting him at the end of the aisle, you could be wearing a garbage bag and he would like it. But yes. I think he'll love it," Bernadette said.

"Okay. There's one huge hurdle," Penny said, exhaling the breath she had been holding since she walked into the store. "You girls wanna go get lunch? I'm starving."

"You better be paying, Bernadette, because she's eating for three," Amy said quickly.

"Oh, shut up. I'll be right back." Penny and Claire went back to the dressing room, returning a few minutes later with the garment bag hanging over her shoulder. They went back to their cars and drove to a nearby restaurant for lunch.

"So how did you find out that you're pregnant?" Amy asked once they had been seated.

"What do you mean, how did I find out? I missed my period, I threw up at work on multiple occasions, and couldn't stop running to the bathroom."

"Yeah, those would be the ways a normal woman would find out that she's pregnant. I think what Amy means is, which sign made you decide it was time to come out of your happy place of denial and face up to it?" Bernadette rephrased.

"I guess when I reached a point where I was throwing up so much that my manager told me to see a doctor or be fired. It was a really tough decision, but I went with the doctor," Penny explained.

"When did you tell Leonard?" Amy asked.

"Two weeks after I found out."

"Wow. That's kind of a long time. Why didn't you tell him sooner?" Bernadette asked.

"Well, in your words, I was still halfway stuck in my 'happy place of denial,' so I didn't tell him."

"How did he react? Was he mad?" Amy wondered.

"It's Leonard. Of course he wasn't mad," Penny said. "I think he took it really well. Way better than I did. He didn't curse me out like I did to that doctor."

"You might want to consider some anger management sessions before giving birth," Amy suggested. Penny ignored her.

"Well, what are you hoping for? Boy and boy, girl and girl, or one of each?" Bernadette asked.

"Either girl and girl or one of each. I don't think I could handle two boys," Penny said.

"What about Leonard?"

"I don't know. We haven't talked about it much," Penny admitted.

"You just found out you're having twins and you haven't talked about it much?" Bernadette asked incredulously.

"Well, he wants to. He wants to talk about it a lot. He keeps bringing up names and stuff, but I won't let him keep going."

"You don't want to talk about your developing children?" Amy asked.

"No. I really don't," Penny said honestly. "I kind of rolled my eyes when you first said that I live in my happy place of denial, but now that I'm thinking about it, those are the best words anyone could use to describe how I'm handling this. I won't let Leonard talk about it with me, I don't want to think about names, I don't want to think about anything that relates to babies. I just can't admit to myself that I let this happen."

"By what you're saying, Leonard sounds like he's starting to get excited about it," Amy pointed out.

"Yeah, because Leonard wants kids."

"And you don't?" Bernadette asked.

"Well, I didn't. Maybe I still don't. I don't know. It doesn't really matter what I want anymore. I'm getting what I'm getting." Penny sighed. "Look, it's only been a few weeks. I'll get used to the idea eventually. I just haven't gotten there yet."

"Are you okay, Penny?" Bernadette asked after she had been silent for a few minutes.

"It's just a really, _really_ big change really, _really_ fast." Penny quickly wiped her eyes when she felt them welling up with tears.

"Oh, Penny, I'm sorry. Did we say something?" Bernadette asked anxiously.

"No. It's just really weird. Really hard," Penny said tearfully.

"We'll do anything we can to help you. You know that, don't you?" Amy said.

"I do. I'm sorry, I shouldn't be crying. I'm just emotional and hormonal and I feel like my life as I knew it is completely falling apart," Penny said as she wiped her eyes with her napkin.

"As you knew it, yes. But that doesn't mean that the new life that's developing is going to be horrible," Bernadette said encouragingly.

"Oh, I know it won't. I'll have Leonard. Nothing can be completely horrible if I have him," Penny said. "And I know in my brain that the second I hold those kids, I'm gonna fall madly in love with them. But it's going to be a long road from here to there."

"At least you know all that intellectually. That's the first step." Bernadette patted Penny's hand. "Try not to worry, okay? You have so many people who love and support you and Leonard. Everything is going to be fine."

"Thanks, Bernadette," Penny said as she began to compose herself.

"I know this is hard, but try not to think about the babies this week," Bernadette instructed. "You're getting married. This week is all about you and Leonard, okay?"

"Okay. That's good advice. Just focus on Leonard," Penny said to herself. "Okay, I think I'm good. I'm sorry. This is why I haven't wanted to talk to Leonard about it. I knew I would get upset."

"We understand that. But I really think you need to talk to Leonard. He'll make you feel better than anyone else will," Bernadette said.

"I know you're right. Once we're married, I will make sure we start to seriously talk about this," Penny swore. "Now, let's stop talking about babies. Let's talk wedding."


	25. Chapter 25

Two days passed, making it Friday and the day before the wedding. Leonard and Penny were standing at the luggage claim area at the airport again, waiting for her parents to get off their plane.

"So what about your family?" Penny asked as they waited.

"What about them?" Leonard wondered.

"When are they coming in? Do we need to pick them up?"

"No. Mom and Samantha flew in together yesterday."

"And your dad and brother?"

"I still haven't told them. It's just not worth it," Leonard told her. "What about your sister?"

"She flew in with Mom and Dad. I bet you can't wait to see that crazy bat again," Penny said. She spotted her family coming off the escalator. "And there they are."

"Penny!" Katie Anne squealed as she rushed towards her sister and threw her arms around her, nearly knocking Penny to the floor.

"Whoa! Watch yourself, Katie. Pregnant with twins here," Penny said as she shrugged her off.

"I know! I'm so excited for you! If one of them is a girl, will you name her Katie?"

"I'll talk about it with Leonard," Penny said as her parents reached them with broad smiles.

"Look at you, Penny dear! You're already glowing!" Mary said happily.

"Thanks, Mom," Penny said.

"Good to see you again, Leonard," Wyatt said as he shook Leonard's hand.

"Nice to see you, too, Wyatt," Leonard replied.

"You know what's coming next, don't you?"

"No, I-I don't think I do," Leonard said uncertainly.

"I'd like to have another talk with you," Wyatt told him. "Penny Rose, I got another rental car. If you wouldn't mind, I'd like you to pick it up and take your mother and your sister out to lunch."

"Yeah, I can do that," Penny said, feeling more comfortable with leaving Leonard with her dad than she did the first time.

"Good. We'll all talk later. Come on, Leonard," Wyatt said as he headed for the parking garage. Leonard said a quick goodbye to Penny before he rushed to catch up with him.

"Would you like the keys, Wyatt?" he asked as they approached his car.

"Nope. This time, you get to drive," Wyatt said as he headed for the passenger's seat. Leonard couldn't help but smile as he got into the driver's side, knowing that this was a great showing of trust from his father-in-law.

"Where would you like to go this time?" Leonard asked once they were in the car.

"I'm handing you the reins, Leonard. Take me wherever you want to go," Wyatt told him.

"Oh. Wow. Okay," Leonard said as he began to think of where to take him. Once he decided on a nearby restaurant, he pulled out of the parking lot and made the short drive. They went inside together and sat down at a table, ready to talk.

"You're a smart man. I assume you know why I wanted to sit you down again," Wyatt began.

"Well, there are a few possibilities," Leonard said. "Option one, you want to talk to me about marrying your daughter and how to stand right by her. Option two, you want to talk to me about getting your daughter pregnant and how to stand right by our children. Option three, any combination thereof."

"You think too much, son, you know that?" Wyatt said after a moment, quieting Leonard. "In my mind, I have no worries about you marrying Penny. You're a respectable man. I trust you with her."

"Thank you, sir. That means a lot to me," Leonard said, sighing with relief.

"Now the second matter. Getting her pregnant," Wyatt said. "Don't let me put words in your mouth, but I assume it's safe to say that no one involved would prefer that this happen so soon, am I right?"

"I…would have preferred it happened maybe a few years down the line, but I'm not at all upset by it," Leonard replied.

"We're not upset by it, either. Just a little worried," Wyatt told him. "I love Penny more than life, but I never saw her with children. She was always out partying and I don't know what all. She never showed any desire to settle down with a family. To be honest, I was a little surprised she got engaged."

"So what's your worry?" Leonard asked.

"Our worry is that Penny is not ready to be a mother, especially to twins," Wyatt said. "Penny…She's a wild one, always has been. Always out looking for the next adventure. But when you have kids, you can't be looking for adventure anymore. Mary had our first child, Penny's brother Carter, when she was seventeen. She was just like Penny, always out causing mischief. Her entire world changed in nine short months, and it wasn't easy on her."

"So what did you do for her?" Leonard wondered.

"I just had to keep reminding her that it would all be worth it in the end. She didn't believe me at first, but when Carter was born and she held that boy for the first time, she completely changed her tune. She would have taken a bullet for him after only knowing him for five minutes."

"Do you think that will happen with Penny?"

"I do. At least, I hope," Wyatt said. "Just be careful afterwards, okay? Mary and I both said no more after Carter. But then we had Penny, and then we had Katie Anne. Now, of course, I love all of my children, but it would have been a lot less stressful if we had been more responsible, and I say the same to you, especially since you're having two the first time around."

"We've always been very careful. Penny's always been on birth control and all that."

"Birth control fails. Condoms break. I'm not going to waste my breath preaching abstinence, so I'm just going to say, be careful."

"We will," Leonard promised.

"I know you will," Wyatt said. "As for you, I'm not really worried about you."

"You're not?"

"No. You've got a good job. You make a good living. You're intelligent and responsible. You know how to keep Penny in line, something I have never been able to master. You'll provide well for my grandbabies. I know you will."

"Thank you, Wyatt. I can't tell you how much it means to me to have your approval. I promise I won't let Penny or your grandchildren down," Leonard said.

"I'm trusting you, Leonard. Now enough business. Tell me what's going on with you."

Leonard and Wyatt spent the rest of their lunch having a casual conversation. It was the first time Leonard had felt completely comfortable with his father-in-law. Knowing that he had so much confidence in him made him even more excited to marry Penny the next day.


	26. Chapter 26

"My goodness, Penny. You are _stunning_."

The big day had finally arrived. After kicking Leonard out of the apartment a few hours before, Penny—with the help of her mother, her sister, Amy, and Bernadette—was dressed with impeccably perfect hair and makeup. Mary, Amy, Bernadette, and Katie Anne were standing back, admiring her.

"You think so?" Penny asked her mother. She couldn't stop focusing on her stomach, which she thought was sticking out despite the tight bodice.

"Stop thinking about it, Penny. You look perfect," Bernadette assured her.

"You look better than you've ever looked," Mary said.

"Are you ladies ready yet?" Wyatt asked from the hall.

"You can come in now," Mary told him. When he entered Penny's bedroom, his mouth dropped open.

"What do you think, Dad?" Penny asked.

"My little girl isn't so little anymore," Wyatt finally said. He quickly added on when he saw Penny's panicked look. "I didn't mean your size, honey. I just meant you look very mature and very, very beautiful. Leonard is lucky to have you."

"I'm lucky to have him," Penny said, catching one last glance at herself in the mirror. "Alright. I don't want to be late for my own wedding. Let's hit the road."

Now completely ready to go, the group of six made their way down the four flights of stairs and into Wyatt's rental car. He drove them to the hotel where they were having their wedding in a ballroom. Mary, Amy, and Bernadette rushed in to take their seats, leaving Penny and Wyatt waiting for their cue to walk.

"Are you nervous?" he asked her.

"To get married or to do life?" Penny replied.

"I guess both," Wyatt said with a shrug.

"Well, you know me. Commitment has never really been my thing."

"You're telling me? Penny Rose, I couldn't get you to commit to what restaurant you wanted to go to for your birthday, let alone who you're going to spend the rest of your life with."

"Saying that makes me more nervous, Dad," Penny told him.

"You're not having second thoughts, are you?" Wyatt asked.

"No, not at all! I just have a lot on my plate right now. Now please, stop making me anxious."

"Alright, alright." Wyatt and Penny stood silently for a few minutes.

"Why are you so quiet?" Penny asked.

"You told me not to talk."

"No, I told you not to talk about _that_."

"Ah. You know, I never would have expected you to pick someone like Leonard. But I'm so glad you saw what he has to offer," Wyatt said.

"Yeah, he's definitely not my usual. He's ten times better," Penny said, smiling. "I didn't realize until I met Leonard that I had been selling myself short for years. He showed me that I'm worth so much more than I thought. He's the best guy in the world." A piano began to play. "That's the cue, right?"

"Sure is." Wyatt took Penny's arm in his. "Come on, Penny Rose. Time to give you away." Penny smiled at her father before they entered the ballroom and walked down the aisle.

Penny carefully observed Leonard's reaction when he caught his first glimpse of her as a bride. She had to stop herself from laughing out loud when she saw his mouth drop open. He quickly shut it and stared at her, his eyes spreading out above the frames of his glasses.

"Do I need to remind you how breathing works again?" Penny whispered to him once she had reached the front. Leonard only nodded, making Penny smile. They turned their attention to the officiant when he started to speak.

"Dearly beloved, we have gathered here today to share with Penny and Leonard a very special moment in their lives. In the years they have been together, their love and understanding of each other has grown and matured, and now they have decided to live their lives together as husband and wife."

The officiant continued on, giving a definition of marriage and speaking of the seriousness of the vows they were about to take. But Penny and Leonard were only half listening to him. They were much more interested in each other than listening to a stranger. They only began to pay attention again when the officiant said their names.

"In place of a formal reading, Penny and Leonard have each selected a passage that they feel represents their relationship that they would like to read," he said.

"Wanna go first, Leonard?" Penny asked.

"Sure." Leonard reached into his pocket with trembling hands and pulled out a piece of paper. "So, this is a quote from Albert Einstein. 'Gravitation cannot be held responsible for people falling in love. How on earth can you explain in terms of chemistry and physics so important a biological phenomenon as true love? Put your hand on a stove for a minute and it feels like an hour. Sit with that special girl for an hour and it feels like a minute. That is relativity.'"

"Wow. Einstein just surprised me," Penny said with a smile. She then moved to pull a piece of paper out of her bra.

"Classy broad I'm marrying," Leonard said with a smile.

"My dress doesn't have pockets." Penny unfolded her piece of paper. "Okay, so this is a poem called _It's You I Like_ from _Mr. Roger's Neighborhood_." Their friends laughed before Penny started to read. "'It's you I like. Not the things you wear. It's not what you do with your hair. But it's _you_ I like. The way you are right now, deep down inside you. Not the things that hide you. Not your diplomas; they're just beside you. But it's _you_ I like. Every part of you, your skin, your eyes, your feelings, whether new or old. I hope that you'll remember even when you're feeling blue, that it's _you_ I like. It's you yourself, it's you. It's _you_ I like.'" She looked up after replacing the paper in her bra and saw Leonard smiling broadly.

"That was perfect," he told her. She smiled back as the officiant moved on.

"Before you declare your vows to one another, I want to hear you confirm that it is, indeed, your intention to be married today," he said. "Leonard, do you come here today freely and without reservation to give yourself to Penny in marriage? If so, answer, 'I do.'"

"I do," Leonard said, his big smile seemingly unbreakable.

"And Penny, do you come here freely and willingly to give yourself to Leonard in marriage? If so, answer, 'I do.'"

"I most certainly do," Penny said enthusiastically.

"That's what I like to hear," the officiant said with a smile. "Leonard, please repeat after me. I—"

"Don't worry, I have it memorized," Leonard told him. "I, Leonard, take you, Penny, to be my lawfully wedded wife. To have and to hold from this day forward, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, from this day forward, until death do us part."

"Penny?" the officiant said.

"I, Penny, take you, Leonard, to be my husband. To have and hold from now on, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, from today onwards, until death do us part. Was that right?" Penny asked.

"Close enough," the officiant told her, making Leonard chuckle.

Penny and Leonard exchanged rings, the stage being drawn out a bit by Leonard dropping his twice as he tried to slip it onto Penny's finger. Penny smiled as she watched him scramble to pick it up, thinking he was too cute. Finally, there was only one more step until they were married.

"Alright. By the power vested in me by the State of California, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride," the officiant instructed. Without waiting a moment, Penny took the lead and initiated their first kiss as a married couple. Their friends and family all clapped for them as they walked out of the room together, but they were much more focused on each other.

"Well, how about that?" Leonard said once they were alone in the hallway.

"Yeah. You're not my fiancé anymore," Penny said as she realized she was officially talking to her husband.

"I know. How do you feel about that?" Leonard asked.

"I'll tell you how I _don't_ feel," Penny said. "I don't feel scared."

"About anything or—"

"No, I'm definitely still scared about the other thing. But I'm not scared of making this commitment anymore," Penny told him.

"That makes me really happy," Leonard told her.

"So what comes next?" Penny wondered.

"I don't know. What do you want to do?"

"Well, we could either go back in there, where we can watch our friends drink without us and referee our families. _Or_, you and I could go find something to do on our own."

"So far, option two is looking more enjoyable. What are you thinking?"

"I'm thinking, A, I need to take off this dress because I haven't been able to breathe for the last hour," Penny began.

"That can be arranged. What else do you want?"

"I don't want to go to a party. I don't want to be on display all night. I just want a relaxing, uneventful night alone with you. Something tells me that we won't be having many more of them."

"You know I'm always good for that." Leonard took Penny's hand. "Come on, wife."

"Alright, husband," Penny said with a big smile. They walked out the car together, ready to begin a new life together that would surely be anything but dull.


	27. Chapter 27

Since they couldn't travel literally, Penny and Leonard spent the next week hitting every continent via food. Now two months into her pregnancy, Penny was constantly ravenous, so she had been immediately on board when Leonard came up with the idea.

"Alright. I'm back from the Indian place," Leonard said as he walked into the apartment, bags of food hanging from his arms.

"Thank _God_, I am _starving_," Penny said as she got up from the couch and rushed to the table. Leonard joined her and began to unpack the food.

"Curry vindaloo for you, butter chicken for me," he said.

"Did you get naan?" Penny asked.

"Yes."

"Garlic and plain?"

"Yes."

"What about samosas?"

"Yes."

"Oh! Did you get those spicy pickle thingies they have that I like?"

"Yes," Leonard said, holding up the container.

"You're the best. I didn't even ask for those," Penny said as she fished a few out with her fork onto her plate. "You know, it's weird. At first, I hardly knew I was pregnant. Now that I've hit two months, I feel like I will never be full ever again."

"It has become quite a feat to make you stop eating. It'll be interesting to see how much more we spend on food," Leonard said.

"If we keep eating out like this, probably a billion dollars," Penny said.

"Yeah, we're gonna have to stop that. Babies are expensive, and we have to multiply the costs by two."

"I don't even want to think about that," Penny said as she ferociously dove into her meal. "Thank God one of us is employable, that's all I have to say."

"Well, still, I did some calculations—"

"Calculations, you're always doing calculations. Why don't we just see what happens?" Penny proposed, mostly focused on her food.

"I would love to say yes, but when those calculations reveal that the first year of life for a baby averages about ten grand—and remember to multiply that by two—_plus_ we still have to buy a house, my way starts to make a lot of sense," Leonard told her. Penny dropped her fork when she heard the number.

"I'm sorry, did you just tell me that the babies in just the first _year_ are going to cost twenty grand?" she asked. Leonard nodded. "That's as much as I made in a year at The Cheesecake Factory."

"Then I guess it's a good thing you're not alone," Leonard told her.

"No shit," Penny said, a bit shell-shocked. "And that doesn't include a house?"

"No, generally houses cost a great deal more than twenty thousand dollars."

"How are we going to pay for all this, Leonard?" Penny asked, panic rising in her voice.

"Relax, okay? I told you, I have a lot of money saved up."

"But I don't want you to spend all of your savings on me!"

"Penny, you're my wife. These are my children. What would constitute a better expense than this?" Leonard wondered.

"No, you're right. I guess I'm just not used to the idea of anyone actually _wanting _and being _able_ to take care of me financially. Most guys I dated before you would take my money then spend it on the girl they were seeing behind my back," Penny said, going back to her food.

"Well, that shouldn't be. But we don't need to talk about money anymore, alright?"

"Is it making you nervous?" Penny asked after observing him for a few minutes.

"Of course it's making me nervous. It's no small amount of money, _especially_ when you add in the house. But I'll take care of it. I promise. Now let's talk about something else, okay?"

"'Kay," Penny said, smiling at him. "You're the greatest guy, Leonard. I wish all guys could be like you."

"I'm glad they aren't."

"Why's that?"

"Because if they were, you wouldn't have had any reason to pick me," Leonard told her, looking down at his plate. Penny put her fork down, reached across the table, lifted his chin with her index finger, and kissed him.

"Yes, I would have. _Plenty _of reasons," she told him when they separated. They finished their dinner in comfortable silence.

**XXX**

Six more weeks passed, making Penny three and half months pregnant and in her second trimester. Penny and Leonard had started their search for a house, but so far hadn't found anything they liked and could afford. They were having a dinner of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches—one of Penny's current cravings—and looking at more housing flyers.

"So I'm having another ultrasound tomorrow," Penny announced, as they flipped through the pictures. "I don't want to keep asking you to take off work, especially now that I know how much babies cost, but if you can, I'd like you to be there."

"Of course. I'll make it happen. Another ultrasound?"

"Yeah. Apparently, women carrying twins have to have a ton more checkups than women carrying one baby 'cause even if you're young and in perfect health, it's still considered a high-risk pregnancy," Penny explained.

"Do you know what they're looking for?" Leonard asked.

"I don't think they're looking for anything in particular, just making sure nothing's wrong," Penny told him. "But I'm _hoping_ they can tell us if they're boys or girls. I'm dying to know."

"At this point, they might be able to, but don't get your hopes up."

"I just want to know what they are so we can start talking about names and stop calling them 'the babies,'" Penny told him.

"Well, hopefully we'll get lucky. What do you think of this house?"

Penny and Leonard spent the rest of the evening staring at house listings online. They went to bed early, which had become their common practice as Penny's energy was more easily drained every day. Early the next morning, Leonard drove them to the doctor for the ultrasound. They were quickly escorted into the back and met by Dr. Mason.

"Hello, there," she greeted them with a smile as she sat down in front of the computer monitor. "How are you feeling, Penny?"

"You know. Pregnant," she said vaguely.

"No major complaints?"

"Besides the fact that I'm dying to know if the babies are boys or girls, none."

"Well, let's see if I can tell you that today. Lift up your shirt, please," Dr. Mason requested. Penny removed her shirt halfway, revealing her quickly growing stomach. Dr. Mason squeezed the gel over it and looked around for a few minutes.

"I have good news," she said.

"You can tell?" Penny asked excitedly.

"I actually can. I can also tell you that you're having identical twins," Dr. Mason said.

"How can you tell that?" Leonard wondered. Dr. Mason moved the screen so they could see.

"You see this? This is what we call a monochorionic diamniotic placenta," she explained. "Both of your babies share a single placenta and a single outer membrane, but have their own separate inner membrane. The fact that they share the placenta and outer membrane tells us that they're identical."

"So that means we either have two boys or two girls. Which is it?" Penny asked.

"You are going to be the proud parents of two girls," Dr. Mason announced.

"Wow. Did you hear that, Leonard? Two identical girls," Penny said. Leonard smiled when he saw her smile as she looked at the screen, thrilled that some of her anxiety was finally starting to slip away.

"I know. It's going to be great," Leonard told her.

"And the best news is, they look absolutely perfect," Dr. Mason said before she turned off the screen and handed Penny a paper towel to wipe off her stomach. "You're doing great. Congratulations."

"Thank you. Hopefully I can tell you what we're going to name them next time I come in," Penny said.

"I'm excited to hear what you choose. I'll see you in a few weeks, Penny." Dr. Mason stood up and left the room.

"Ready to go?" Leonard asked as Penny sat up.

"Ready to go. Can we talk about names when we get back?"

"Absolutely. I'm thrilled that you want to," Leonard said with a big smile.

"When I said that I didn't, I still hadn't accepted it yet. Now I'm starting to realize that no matter what, it's all going to be okay," Penny told him. "Come on. Let's go home."

Penny and Leonard left the office and got in the car. When they got back to the apartment, they sat down on the couch together. Penny pulled out her phone.

"So I don't know about you, but I started a list a few weeks ago of names I like," she told him.

"I started a list a few days after I found out we're having twins," Leonard said.

"Perfect. Maybe we could look at each other's?" Penny suggested. They swapped phones and scrolled through the list.

"I don't see one name that made it on both of ours," Leonard said.

"Yeah. Neither do I. Can't say I'm surprised," Penny agreed. "I have an idea."

"What's that?"

"I _really_, _really_, _really_ don't want to get into a fight with you about names. So he's what I think we should do," Penny said. "We're having two babies. I think we should each name one of them. Once we've decided, we'll tell each other what we picked, and neither of us can argue with it."

"Well…Okay," Leonard said hesitantly. "But you have every single Disney princess on this list. Please promise me you won't name her Snow White or Cinderella."

"Deal, if you promise not to name her Jill or Sarah."

"What's wrong with Jill and Sarah?"

"Nothing's wrong with them. They're just so common," Penny told him. "Do we have a deal?"

"We have a deal," Leonard agreed.

"Excellent." Penny gave Leonard a quick kiss. "Alright. You better get to work. I'll stay here and start thinking about my name."

"Sounds good. I'll think about mine over lunch." Leonard stood up and grabbed his bag. "I'll see you later."

"See you," Penny said as he walked out the door. She looked down at her phone and stared at it, seriously considering her options.

**XXX**

After two weeks of consideration, Penny and Leonard had both finally come to a conclusion about their names. They got together on the couch after dinner, eagerly anticipating hearing their children's names.

"Alright. Do you want to go first?" Leonard asked.

"Sure. I decided on Alexis Sabrina," Penny told him.

"That's nice," Leonard said.

"Thanks. What did you choose?"

"I chose Leah Alice."

"Alexis and Leah. I really, really like that," Penny said.

"I really like it, too," Leonard said. "That might have been one of the best ideas you've ever had, Penny. We got two great names without fighting at all. And you didn't name her Snow White or Chardonnay."

"Yeah, I figured you might hate those. And Leah Alice isn't too boring. It's classic and perfect," Penny said. "Wow, I'm really happy right now."

"Good. I'm glad. I'm really happy, too," Leonard said, smiling at his wife. He was ecstatic to see Penny becoming more and more comfortable and excited about having their children every day.

"Let's make dinner. Alexis and Leah are very hungry," Penny said, patting her stomach.

"More peanut butter and jelly, coming up," Leonard said as he got off the couch and headed to the kitchen to make the sandwiches Penny had been craving. While he was working, Penny looked down at her now rotund stomach, surprisingly eager to have Alexis and Leah come into their world.


	28. Chapter 28

After a few more weeks spent house hunting, Penny—now five months pregnant—finally found a listing she thought might be perfect for them. She waited anxiously for Leonard to come home from work, like a dog waiting for the return if its owner. After two hours of waiting, he finally walked through the front door.

"Thank God you're back. I never thought I would miss working at The Cheesecake Factory, but I am _so bored_ sitting at home all day doing nothing," Penny said.

"Enjoy it while it lasts. Once Alexis and Leah come along, neither of us will have any down time," Leonard told her as he joined her on the couch. "I see you're back to eating Twizzlers dipped in Nutella."

"Oh. Yeah, among other things," Penny said. "I want to show you what I found."

"What'd you find?" Leonard asked as Penny opened her laptop.

"A house," Penny told him, showing him a picture of the exterior. "It's a one story, three bedroom house. It's right by Caltech, and it's _beautiful_."

"Alright, show me," Leonard said. Penny scrolled through the pictures of the home slowly so he could analyze them.

"What do you think?" Penny asked once they had gone through all of them.

"It's great. How much is it?"

"Ten grand under our budget," Penny said with a smile. "Wanna go see it tomorrow?"

"Absolutely. Great job, Penny," Leonard praised.

"Thank you. It only took two hours of sorting through houses to find it," Penny said. "And since I found this, maybe you could do me a favor."

"I sense a trip to the grocery store," Leonard said. Penny nodded. "What would you like now?"

"Mint chip ice cream. The green kind."

"You know that's just food coloring, right?"

"It matters, Leonard," Penny insisted.

"Alright. But if Alexis and Leah come out with mint green skin, you and I might have a problem," Leonard said as he stood up from the couch and grabbed his keys.

"Hey, Leonard."

"Yes?"

"Will you go to White Castle on the way back?"

"White Castle? You hate White Castle."

"Yeah, but they do have good onion rings, and I just had an idea."

"What's that?"

"Onion rings dipped in warm peanut butter."

"First you mix Flaming Hot Cheetos with mashed avocados, neither of which you even like. Now you want to dip onion rings in peanut butter?"

"I have no idea where I'm getting these ideas, but they just sound like the most delicious things ever," Penny told him.

"If you say so. I'll stop by White Castle."

"You're the best!" Penny called to Leonard as he walked out the door. She went back to looking at the pictures of what she knew was the perfect house.

**XXX**

"We are not going to find a better house than that for this price," Penny said to Leonard as they walked up the stairs to the fourth floor. They were returning from their viewing of the house she had showed Leonard the day before, both very excited.

"I agree. I think it's perfect," Leonard said.

"Best part? No stairs," Penny said. "Pregnant women should not have to climb up four flights of stairs every time they leave the house."

"We're almost there. And by the looks of it, we won't be living here much longer," Leonard said as the rounded the next corner.

"So you want to make an offer?" Penny asked.

"If you want to, then I think we should. It's just right."

"Alright. Will you call the real estate agent on Monday and tell him we want it?"

"No problem," Leonard said as they reached the fourth floor. Sheldon was standing in the hall idly, as if he had been waiting for them.

"Hey, Sheldon," Leonard greeted him.

"What are you telling a real estate agent you want?" Sheldon asked.

"We're buying a house," Penny explained.

"Leonard, you told me you were going to be living in Penny's apartment," Sheldon said.

"Well, we were, but that was before we found out we're having twins. There's not enough space in Penny's apartment for us and two babies," Leonard told him.

"So you're moving out of the building?"

"Yes, we are."

"When?"

"I don't know, Sheldon. We haven't even officially bought the house yet," Leonard said.

"But you are definitely moving out."

"_Yes_, Sheldon," Leonard said, exasperated. Without another word, Sheldon turned around and went back into his apartment, slamming the door.

"Oh, great. Now we have a cranky Sheldon," Leonard said.

"Go talk to him," Penny said.

"Penny…"

"Leonard, I'm tired, my back hurts, my feet hurt, and I'm starving. You go talk to Sheldon and I'm going to lay down," Penny said definitively. She crossed the hallway and let herself into the apartment. Leonard sighed, but followed Sheldon into his.

"Alright, Sheldon, let's talk," he said as he sat down beside his friend on the couch. "What's the matter?"

"You said you weren't going to move farther than across the hall. You lied," Sheldon said.

"I did not lie, Sheldon. When I said that, I didn't know that a few months later, Penny would become pregnant with twins," Leonard said defensively. "You know that it is completely illogical for us to try to raise twins in Penny's tiny apartment."

"But if you two leave, I won't have anyone," Sheldon said.

"Well, I'm sorry, but as it strange as it seems to everyone involved, I have a family now. They have to come first," Leonard told him. "It's going to be hard, but it's also going to be good for you when we leave. You're a grown man, Sheldon. It's time for you to stand on you own."

"I know I'm a grown man. But it's nice to have someone around," Sheldon told him.

"Maybe you should start looking for a new roommate, Sheldon. That way, you won't be alone," Leonard suggested.

"I'd like to, but I'm dreading having to get used to a new person and train them to be a proper roommate."

"Then I don't know what you want me to say. You didn't expect that we would live together for the rest of our lives, did you? Didn't you think that one of us would eventually get married?"

"No, I didn't. Did you?" Sheldon asked.

"No. This is a miracle," Leonard admitted. "But whether we anticipated it or not, it's what's happening, like me and Penny having children now."

"At first, I thought I would hate not having you live here. Then I talked to Penny, and I thought it might be okay, and it was for awhile. But now it's boring. I have no one to stimulate me intellectually," Sheldon said.

"Well, it's nice that you're finally understanding the importance of human contact," Leonard said. "What about Amy? What's going on with you two?"

"Nothing has changed with Amy since before you and Penny got engaged."

"Well, maybe something should," Leonard said. "Amy stimulates you intellectually. You wouldn't have to train her in any way. Plus, she already wants to move in with you. Why don't you let her?"

"Perhaps I will," Sheldon said after a few moments.

"Really?" Leonard asked, surprised that that had worked.

"Perhaps, yes," Sheldon said. "At first, I assumed you wouldn't want Amy to move in while we were living together, just as I didn't want Penny to move in with us. Then you and Penny got engaged, and you moved out, and all Amy has been able to talk about is us moving in together. Now I have no rational argument to oppose her proposal. But if you're not going to be across the hall, maybe it wouldn't be so bad to have her live with me."

"Wow, Sheldon. This is a really, really big move. Are you sure you're ready for it?"

"No, but the only way to know for sure is to try."

"Okay, what's going on with you? Did Amy rewire your brain while you were sleeping?"

"No. By watching you experience so much change, I've started to realize that perhaps it's time for me to take the next step in evolution as well, like Penny said," Sheldon said.

"So you're _really_ going to tell Amy she can move in with you?"

"Yes. I believe I will," Sheldon said. "I feel like I should thank you, Leonard."

"Thank me? For what?"

"For showing me that change—even drastic change—does not necessarily result in turmoil," Sheldon told him. "You will have gotten married and become a father to two children within seven months. Yet somehow, you have not fallen apart. If you can keep your life stable even with such dramatic changes, perhaps I can, too."

"Well, if that's what you want to do, Sheldon, then I think it's a great idea," Leonard said. "So you're okay with me and Penny moving into our own house?"

"I think I will be, especially if Amy agrees to move in with me. She'll have to sleep in your old room, of course," Sheldon said.

"Well, that's a start." Leonard stood up. "Well, Penny's not feeling great. I should probably go check on her. I'll see you later." He started to walk towards the door.

"Leonard," Sheldon said just before he could open the door.

"Yes, Sheldon?"

"Will you tell me when you're going to move?"

"Yes. I promise."

"Alright. Goodbye."

"Goodbye." Leonard left the apartment and crossed the hall to get to his and Penny's. When he walked in, he saw Penny laying on the couch.

"Are you feeling alright?" he asked her.

"My back is killing me, and my feet hurt so badly, I can't stand. But I'm fine," Penny assured him. "How was your talk with Sheldon?"

"He wants Amy to move in with him."

"Are you kidding me?!" Penny exclaimed. Leonard shook his head. "Oh, my God! What did you say to him?"

"Not much. He doesn't want us to move out of the building because he doesn't want to be alone. I suggested having Amy move in with him, not really expecting that he would. But then he told me that watching me experience so much change so quickly but not fall apart made him think that he might be okay if Amy moved in with him," Leonard explained.

"Oh, my God. I can't believe this."

"Apparently, we're not the only people embracing change," Leonard said. "Speaking of our biggest change, I see you wincing. You sure you're okay?"

"I'll be fine. I know it will be totally worth it in the end, but being pregnant kind of sucks." Penny looked down at her now very noticeable belly. "Maybe it's because it makes them seem more human, I don't know, but for some reason, naming them made me really, really excited to have them. Now I can't believe there was ever a point when I totally resented the fact that I'm pregnant."

"I'm so happy you're happy," Leonard said. "I can't wait for us to buy this house and have these kids and…start this life I thought I would never have."

"Why didn't you think you would have this life?" Penny wondered.

"Because I never thought I would ever meet someone who wanted to marry me," Leonard told her.

"Your lack of confidence kills me, sweetie," Penny said sadly.

"It doesn't matter anymore. You proved me wrong." Leonard smiled a little. "You know, when we first met, everyone told me that my chances with you were comparable to a planet forming near an O-type star."

"Oh, sweetie. I don't know what that means," Penny said, smiling back.

"It means, Howard and Sheldon and Raj teased me relentlessly for having such a big crush on you. They kept telling me that you were out of my league, that I never had a chance with you. But you turned out to be kinder and more amazing than they accounted for."

"You're the sweetest. But the fact that I love you doesn't make me amazing. It just makes me normal." Penny sat up enough to kiss Leonard. "Marrying you was the best decision I've ever made in my life."

"Right back at ya. Now let's talk about this house," Leonard said. They spent the rest of the evening planning out the purchase of the house, the beginning of their family.


	29. Chapter 29

The next four months seemed to pass by in a flash. Penny and Leonard had bought their house and fully moved in. After a few disputes about furnishing, they finally had the house and the nursery ready for the babies just in time. Wyatt and Mary had flown in a few days before Penny's scheduled C-section, ready to help their daughter and son-in-law out.

"Leonard, are you ready yet?" Penny yelled from the couch. The big day had arrived, and she was eager to get to the hospital and have the babies taken out of her.

"It's not me we're waiting on, it's your mother," Leonard told her as he came into the living room carrying the duffel bag packed with Penny's things.

"What's she doing?" Penny wondered.

"She's changing."

"What was wrong with what she was wearing?"

"She said that outfit was for cooking breakfast. She needed a new outfit for going to the hospital," Leonard explained as he sat down next to her.

"I swear, that's where Katie Anne gets her crazy," Penny said, rolling her eyes.

"It was nice of them to come in to help us," Leonard reminded her.

"Leonard, I'm as big as a house and can hardly walk. I want these babies out of me," Penny snapped.

"I understand that, but you have to wait just a little bit longer," Leonard said calmly. Over the last few months, his patience had been tested and greatly extended by Penny's moodiness.

"Alright, Penny dear, are you ready to go?" Mary asked as she and Wyatt joined them.

"Extremely. Let's go. Leonard, would you help me up?" Penny requested. Leonard jumped off the couch and helped pull Penny to her feet. The four went out to the car and Wyatt drove them to the hospital. He dropped Penny and Leonard off at the front while he and Mary parked the car. By the time they had checked in, the Penny's parents had found them and they all made their way up to the maternity floor.

The next part of the process seemed to go quickly. Nurses got Penny into a room and changed into a gown. Shortly after she had a hospital bracelet placed on her wrist, Dr. Mason entered the room.

"Are we ready?" she asked as she entered the room.

"_So_ ready," Penny said. "When do I go in?"

"Just as soon as we get an IV and the epidural in you," Dr. Mason told her.

"And when will that happen?"

"Wow, you are eager, aren't you? I'll make sure the nurse gets back in here as soon as possible to put in your IV, okay?" Dr. Mason said. Penny nodded. "Great. Sit tight. I'll be back in a bit."

In another half an hour, Penny had received an IV and an epidural and they had had Leonard put on a gown so he could go into the operating room with Penny. Finally, the doctor came to get the show on the road.

"Are you scared?" Leonard asked Penny once they were in the operating room as the doctors and nurses finished preparing her.

"I wasn't before. Now drugs are helping." One of the nurses put a screen in front of Penny, blocking her view of what the doctors were doing to her. "Oh, that's a good idea. Would you give one of those screens to my husband? He's been known to get queasy really fast."

"Very funny," Leonard said.

"Alright, we're ready to go," the doctor announced.

"Go for it," Penny told him. She felt some pressure as he made the incision, but no pain.

"You really don't feel that?" Leonard asked, his face paling as he watched the doctor.

"Sweetie, I'd like my husband to be here when our babies are born. Please sit down before you pass out," Penny instructed.

"With pleasure," Leonard said as he quickly dropped onto the stool resting by Penny's head. They waited for a bit, holding hands as the doctors did their work. Finally, they heard the telltale sign of a baby crying.

"Here's baby A," the doctor said. "Dad? Would you like to cut the cord?"

"Uh…" The color had completely drained from Leonard's face when he saw the mess.

"It's okay, sweetie. You don't have to," Penny told him.

"I think I'll hold them later," Leonard said once he had her blessing. The doctor nodded as he handed the crying baby off to one of the nurses. Soon enough, the sound of a second baby crying entered the room.

"And here's baby B," the doctor said. After passing the second baby off to the nurse, he began to stitch Penny up. While he was working, the nurses appeared.

"Would you like to see your daughters?" the first one asked.

"Absolutely," Leonard told her.

"This is baby A," she said as she handed Leonard the first baby. Once she made sure he had her, she handed him the second. "And this is baby B."

"Wow. They're so tiny," Penny said as she looked at her newborn daughters.

"I can't believe these are mine," Leonard said.

"Can I hold them?" Penny requested.

"I'm sorry. You have to wait until you're out of surgery. They should be done in just a few minutes, though," the nurse explained. "What would you like to name them?"

"Which one is which, Penny?" Leonard asked.

"Let's name baby A Alexis, 'cause it starts with an A," Penny said.

"Logical," the nurse said as she wrote down the name on a clipboard. "And baby B?"

"Her name is Leah," Leonard told her.

"Those are beautiful names. We'll take Alexis and Leah and get them all cleaned up, then bring them back to you once you're in recovery. Okay?"

"Sure," Leonard said, a little surprised to find that he was having a hard time handing them over to her.

"We'll get them back, sweetie," Penny said, sensing his reluctance.

"Right," Leonard said, finally giving Alexis and Leah to the nurse. Once they were gone, he devoted his attention to Penny. "You doing okay?"

"Yeah, I'm okay. You? You looked a little pale for a minute there," Penny said.

"I'm good." Leonard held Penny's hand for the next twenty minutes until the doctor declared that he was done. When they reached the recovery room, Alexis and Leah were waiting for them.

"Do I get to hold them now?" Penny asked.

"Yes, you do," the nurse said. She picked up one and gently handed her to Penny. "This is Alexis." She picked up the second and gave her to Leonard. "And this is Leah. They're both absolutely perfect. You'll stay in recovery for a few hours so we can keep an eye on you, and then you'll be taken to a room. For now, you can sit here with your husband and get to know your daughters. We'll be back to check on you in a bit."

"Thank you," Penny said.

"You're very welcome. Congratulations." The nurse left them alone.

"Look at them, Leonard," Penny said with a big smile. "Can you believe we made these little creatures? How does that even happen?"

"Well, when an egg is fertilized—"

"Rhetorical question, sweetie," Penny said. "I knew I would love them as soon as I saw them. But I didn't think it was possible to love anything this much after only knowing them for twenty minutes."

"I know exactly what you mean," Leonard said, looking down at Leah. "I can't wait to get to know them, see what their personalities are like."

"I feel so horrible for wishing I wasn't pregnant now. This is the best thing ever," Penny said. When Leonard looked at her, he saw the biggest smile he had ever seen on her, and adoration shining in her eyes.

"It is the best thing ever. And it's only the very beginning."


	30. Chapter 30

After three days spent in the hospital, Penny was released and they brought Alexis and Leah home. Taking care of two infants was proving to be a _big _challenge. While her parents had been extremely helpful during the day while Leonard was at work, the sleepless nights were getting to them. One baby would wake them up. They would go back to sleep, and twenty minutes later, the other baby would start to cry. At two in the morning, Leonard was returning back to their bedroom, where Penny was sitting wide awake.

"I have never been more sleep deprived," Penny said as Leonard got back into bed with her. "They've been home for two weeks, and it feels like I haven't slept for more than five hours in that time."

"Tell me about it," Leonard said. "My job kind of requires full brain function. Lack of sleep seriously diminishes that."

"Can you still do your job?" Penny asked.

"Barely. I ruined an entire experiment because when I was doing my calculations, I screwed up the equation for time dilation."

"I don't know what that means, sweetie."

"It's the stupidest mistake ever, and it cost me hours," Leonard told her.

"I'm sorry."

"Not your fault. I'm just so tired, when I look at equations now, it's just a blur of numbers."

"Maybe you should take a few days, get some rest," Penny suggested.

"I would, but I really need to be working. I already took a week off, and the deadline for me to report my findings on the experiment I just screwed up is in a week. I'm really worried I won't get it done in time."

"Damn. I didn't know you had deadlines. You must be super stressed," Penny said.

"Yeah, I am. But I'll be fine." They both laid back down. "When are your parents leaving?"

"They're supposed to leave in two days, but they both said they would cancel the flight and stay here for as long as we needed them. I told them it seemed a little irrational to keep them here for eighteen years, but if they wanted…"

"We won't need them for eighteen years," Leonard said, smirking. "Give it six months, a year. We'll figure out a routine. They'll get a little older. It'll be fine."

"I know." Penny rolled over so she could face Leonard. "I need to ask you something."

"What's that?"

"I know I promised you that I wouldn't stop working, but I can't imagine how much it would cost to get a nanny, let alone how exhausted I would be. And I don't want to say that, because I know that you're working and taking care of two infants and I don't want to say that isn't a big deal, but—"

"Penny, Penny, stop," Leonard interrupted her. "Of course I don't care if you stop working. I'd go so far as to say I don't even want you to work. I don't want a nanny to raise our daughters. I want us to raise our daughters. I think you should be a stay-at-home mom."

"You sure?"

"Well, if we don't want a nanny to raise Alexis and Leah, at least one of us can't work, and I really love my job and would rather not quit it since it's our only source of income, so yes, I'm sure," Leonard told her. "My money isn't my money anymore. It's _our_ money. That's how it should be."

"I know. You're right. I promise I won't think that anymore," Penny said.

"Good." Leonard rolled onto his back, trying to go back to sleep until he had to wake up in two hours. But he knew there was no hope in falling asleep. "So can you tell them apart yet?"

"No. That's why I won't cut off their hospital bracelets. You?"

"Yep."

"What? How?"

"The way they cry," Leonard explained. "When Alexis cries, she wails to the point where she could wake up a small village. But when Leah cries, it's just enough to get our attention."

"Huh. I'll have to pay attention to that," Penny said. "I have a feeling Leah is going to be kind of shy and soft-spoken. Like her dad."

"And I have a feeling Alexis is going to be outgoing and loud. Like her mom," Leonard replied before a soft cry came through the baby monitor. "And that would be Leah."

"I'll go. You sleep," Penny instructed.

"It's okay. I can get her."

"Leonard, you work with lasers. I love you, but you'll be more useful to me and Alexis and Leah if you don't cook you eyeballs at work tomorrow. Go to sleep." Penny climbed out of bed and went to check on Leah. Leonard rolled over and let his exhaustion take over and let him sleep.

**XXX**

The next day when Leonard got home from work, he found Mary standing in the kitchen holding one of the babies. He put his bag on the counter and moved to take his daughter from his mother-in-law's arms.

"Hello, Leonard," Mary greeted him.

"Hi, Mary. Where's Leah?"

"She's still in her crib upstairs. Alexis was hungry. But how did you know that was Alexis? Penny mentioned something about how they cry, but she's not crying," Mary wondered.

"I don't know how many people would notice this, but Alexis's eyes are a slightly darker shade of blue than Leah's eyes," Leonard explained.

"You are very observant. I didn't notice that," Mary said.

"Where's Penny?" Leonard asked.

"Oh, poor thing. She's exhausted. She was trying to rock Alexis to sleep, but the little girl would not stop wailing. Then Alexis crying woke up Leah, so Leah started crying, which made Penny start crying. I told her to go take a nap; I'd watch them for awhile. That was five hours ago."

"I am not surprised. Neither of us slept for more than two hours last night," Leonard told her.

"Leonard, you're a scientist. How can you do your job without sleeping?" Mary asked.

"Well, Mary, as it turns out, I can't."

"Alright. You go wake up my daughter and get some sleep yourself. None of us need you to get fired or whatever you scientific brainiacs do when you can't use your brain anymore."

"I don't know. I feel like Penny might maul my eyes out if I tried to wake her," Leonard said.

"Oh, I've been mauled by her before when I was trying to wake her up for school. Her bark is bigger than her bite," Mary told him. "Give me that baby and go wake up Penny. You need to sleep. I insist."

"Well, if you insist. I'll see you later." Leonard handed Alexis over to his mother-in-law before he went upstairs to their bedroom. Penny was sound asleep in bed, soft snores escaping her lips. Leonard sat on the edge of the bed and gently shook her. It didn't take long for her to wake up.

"Leonard?" she mumbled, half-conscious.

"Yeah, it's me."

"What are you doing?"

"Well, I told your mother that I can't do my job, so she insisted that I wake you up so I can sleep because she doesn't want me to get fired, which is quite possibly on the table now," Leonard explained.

"What happened today?" Penny asked as she sat up.

"I might have gotten in a little trouble," Leonard admitted.

"What the hell did you do?"

"You know about nuclear weapons, right?"

"I know they blow stuff up."

"Okay, good enough. So the government has these nuclear weapons, and in the past, scientists could rely on nuclear tests to provide regular integral tests of a weapon's performance. But now the unavailability of nuclear testing is requiring them to find new ways to test their safety and reliability."

"Okay…"

"So I got a grant to find new ways to test nuclear weapons without detonating them through laser research on inertial confinement nuclear fusion."

"Get to the point, sweetie."

"Anyway, I've been working with some of the highest power lasers I've ever used before without any sleep."

"Seems like a dangerous combination," Penny commented.

"Well, like an idiot, I thought it would be okay. But like I told you, I've been having a hard time getting my math right, and the first time, it made the experiment not work at all. This time by screwing it up, it…worked a little too well."

"What happened?"

"Well, it turns out that due to my miscalculations this time, my laser was about ten times stronger than it was supposed to be. When I tried to set it off, my aim wasn't exactly perfect, and I ended up burning a pretty significant hole in the wall of my lab."

"You can do that? I thought that was a myth."

"Well, if it was, I can call the Mythbusters and tell them I've done one for them."

"Well, what happened then?"

"The department head came in, saw what happened, and was very upset."

"What did he do, Leonard?"

"Well, I'll admit that I was a little hysterical due to sleep deprivation and the fact that I had just cut a hole in a wall. I tried to explain that I'm taking care of newborn twins and I haven't slept in days. He told me I would have to pay for the damages, which are pretty significant. He also said not to come back until I, and I quote, 'am no longer a mindless fool.'"

"Well, shit, Leonard. Could you seriously lose your job?"

"No, they're not gonna fire me. But they're not happy and they revoked my grant. I can't work on the project anymore."

"That sucks, sweetie. I'm so sorry."

"It's not your fault."

"Yes, it is. Every night, I almost always let you get up and take care of the babies. While it's still not much, I've been getting more sleep than you do, and I'm not working with high-powered lasers and nuclear weapons."

"Well, I was never _directly_ working with nuclear weapons. That part was theoretical."

"As if the lasers aren't enough! You burned a hole in a wall!"

"I'm well aware, thank you."

"I'm sorry. You sleep for as long as you can, okay? Mom and I will take care of the girls," Penny told him.

"I feel bad letting you do everything."

"And I feel bad that you got your grant taken away and got bitched out at work." Penny gave Leonard a kiss before she got out of bed. "I love you. Get some sleep." She let Leonard take her place on the bed and quickly fall asleep. She went downstairs where Mary was sitting on the couch in the living room holding a baby.

"Well, there's Sleeping Beauty," she said as Penny sat down with her.

"Hi, Mom." Penny took the baby from her mother and checked the hospital bracelet to see which one she was holding. "How's Alexis?"

"She's better now that I fed her. That girl has quite the set of lungs," Mary told her.

"I know, and Leah is so quiet. I already can't believe they're twins," Penny said.

"I'm sorry I had Leonard wake you up, but you should have seen him when he walked in. I had never seen anyone looking so tired," Mary told her.

"No, don't be sorry. He needed to sleep, believe me."

"What does that mean?"

"He…Let's just say he screwed up pretty badly at work today because he's too tired to fully focus," Penny said.

"What'd he do, mix the wrong chemicals and blow something up?"

"No, he's not a chemist, he's a physicist. He doesn't work with chemicals."

"Then what did he do?"

"Well, Leonard works with high-powered lasers, and he might have cut a hole in the wall of his lab today," Penny told her mother.

"Oh, good gracious. They didn't fire him, did they?"

"No, but they're not happy with them," Penny said. "Leonard is terrified of getting in trouble with anyone. He's never done a bad thing in his life, never even gotten a traffic ticket. I don't understand why they can't cut him a break since this is his first screw up in ten years."

"Well, you can't deny that even though it's his first, it's fairly large."

"Yeah, but nobody got hurt. That's what really matters, right?"

"Penny dear, you've never worked in a large institution, so let me explain office politics to you," Mary said. "It doesn't matter if it's his first screw up or his ninety-first. It's all about money."

"That explains why they're making him pay for it, even though he told them he has newborn twins. They didn't even care," Penny said.

"Did you not hear what I just said? It's _all about money_. It's not fair, but that's the way it is," Mary said.

"Oh, believe me, I know." Penny sighed as she looked down at Alexis. "Mom, do you think I should feel bad that Leonard's making all of the money and I'm not doing anything?"

"First of all, you're not doing nothing. You're taking care of his children while he's working for them," Mary told her. "Second, no, I don't think you should feel guilty about that at all. Why would you?"

"Well, I mean, both you and Dad worked. I guess I'm using you as an example."

"Well, Penny dear, your father was a farmer and I was a seamstress. We collectively made a lot less money than Leonard does," Mary said. "You're in a very different situation than your father and I were. For one thing—and I'm not criticizing you—it's practically impossible these days to get a decent job without a college degree. I don't want to sound mean, but most likely, any job you get wouldn't be worth beans in comparison. I think you'll be much more useful staying here taking care of Alexis and Leah than you would be working."

"I know you're probably right. But I just hate seeing Leonard kill himself working _and _taking care of the girls, while all I do is some feedings and diaper changes."

"Penny Rose, don't you make it sound like you're not doing anything. You're not going out to work for eight hours a day, but you've got a full-time job," Mary said firmly. "Just let Leonard rest for a few days, alright? I'll stay on the couch and take care of the babies during the night so you both can finally get some sleep."

"Mom, you don't have to do that," Penny said.

"Penny, I insist. If you're going to be able to keep this going when I leave, then you're going to have to have a few days with a full night's sleep. You'll be more able to take care of the girls, Leonard will be more able to do experiments without cutting holes in walls. It'll be better."

"You're the best mom ever," Penny said. Before she could thank her any more, Alexis woke up in her arms and began to cry again. Penny sighed. "Okay. Back to work."


	31. Chapter 31

Penny's parents extended their stay from two more days to two more weeks. She felt guilty keeping them there, but also felt like there would be no way she could handle the twins on her own. Mary and Wyatt also felt guilty about leaving, but knew they had to get back to Nebraska and let Penny and Leonard start to figure things out for themselves.

"This is it. It's all on us," Penny said to Leonard as she watched her parents drive off to the airport.

"That's right. And we can do it," Leonard assured her as he pulled her away from the window and onto the couch.

"I'm going crazy, Leonard," Penny told him. "I haven't left the house since I came home from the hospital a month ago. Your guess for the last time I showered is as good as mine. And now that my mom's gone and you have to work, I'm going to be alone with two babies all day."

"Listen, Penny—" A knock at the door kept Leonard from finishing his thought. "Hang on." He stood up and went to open the door. All of their friends were standing on their porch.

"Surprise! We come bearing gifts!" Bernadette said with a broad grin. "Is this an okay time?"

"Sure, yeah. The girls are sleeping, so try to be kind of quiet," Leonard told her as he stepped aside so they could enter. He led them into the living room, where Penny was already half-asleep after only being left alone for a few seconds.

"Is she okay?" Amy whispered to Leonard.

"Yeah, she's okay. Just tired," Leonard told her.

"Mmm. Who was it?" Penny asked when she heard Leonard's voice.

"Open your eyes and you'll find out," he said.

"Oh, shit," Penny said when she saw her friends.

"Sorry. Maybe we should have called before we came," Bernadette said.

"No, no, no. You're fine. I just look like crap," Penny said.

"Don't be silly. You look great," Bernadette told her as the rest of them sat down. "We just wanted to stop by and see how you guys are doing. We haven't seen you since you had the babies."

"I know, I'm sorry. We've been pretty busy," Penny said.

"No, don't apologize. We completely understand." Amy held out the baking dish she was holding. "We all brought you something."

"What's that?" Penny asked.

"Sheldon and I made you baked ziti. It freezes really well, so you can eat off it for awhile," Amy said.

"I suggested we go to the dollar store and buy you baby clothes there, but Amy informed me that you wouldn't appreciate the clothes' scent," Sheldon said.

"What did they smell like?" Leonard wondered.

"A horrible combination of cigarettes and a strip club," Amy said.

"Okay. Thanks for foregoing that," Penny said.

"My turn," Raj said, also holding a baking dish. "I thought I would make you some dessert. They're chocolate chip cookie brownies."

"They look delicious. Thanks, Raj," Leonard said.

"Here's our present," Howard said, handing Leonard what was obviously a bottle of wine with scraps of birthday wrapping paper slapped over it.

"I let Howard wrap it. My bad," Bernadette said as Leonard peeled off the paper.

"Berringer Howell?" Leonard read of the bottle.

"Are you serious?" Penny asked as she grabbed it from him.

"Is it good?" Leonard asked.

"That is my favorite merlot. Thank you so much," Penny said.

"You better be thankful. Who pays a hundred and thirty dollars for a bottle of wine?" Howard asked, earning a slap on the arm from Bernadette.

"Food. What were we thinking? Why didn't we go for booze?" Amy said to Raj.

"So how are Alexis and Leah doing?" Bernadette asked.

"They're great. Exhausting, but great," Penny told her.

"So you think it's worth it?" Amy asked.

"In my dark moments when I haven't eaten, slept, or showered in a week, no. But then I hate myself and think about how untrue it is. They're definitely worth it."

"What about you, Leonard?" Bernadette asked.

"Exactly what she said," Leonard told her.

"So you sometimes think it wasn't worth it, too?" Amy asked.

"Not really, but that's because I have the easier job," Leonard said. "I get to go away for a few hours and just focus on my experiments. Penny hasn't left the house in a month."

"Not once? Not even for groceries?" Howard asked.

Penny shook her head. "Nope. My parents did all that. They just left today. Now's when it gets really hard. Leonard's going to go to work, and I'm going to be here with two babies all by myself."

"Maybe we could come help you," Bernadette offered.

"That's really sweet, but no. You all have jobs. I can't let you stop working for me."

"Well, if there's anything we can do, don't hesitate, okay?" Bernadette said.

"We might take you up on that. Thanks, Bernadette," Leonard said. A wailing cry came through the baby monitor. "Well, Alexis is up."

"I'll go," Penny said.

"No, stay with them. I'll get her." Leonard stood up and headed upstairs.

"Okay, while he's gone, I have to ask, because he won't talk about it anymore. How's Leonard doing at work?" Penny asked.

"Professionally or socially?" Howard asked.

"Both, but professionally first."

"Professionally, things are better. He submitted a request, but the department won't give him his grant back. He just submitted another proposal, though. It actually sounds really interesting. He's trying to simulate the quantum switch transition through an output circuit—"

"Yeah, yeah, I'll ask him about it later," Penny said, hastily interrupting Howard. "Do you think he'll get the grant?"

"I'd say the chances are good. I do have to admit that it's a rather unique hypothesis. He's quite excited about it," Sheldon told her.

"Okay, that's good. What about socially?"

"Socially, he's currently the laughingstock of the university," Howard said bluntly. "He doesn't come to lunch with us anymore. He doesn't even want us to stop by. He just sits in his lab working."

"He's kind of like he was before he started dating you, Penny," Raj added.

"What do you mean?" Penny asked.

"Before he started dating you, he kind of did the same thing. He was so shy, we had to drag him out of his lab to get him to come to lunch. Now that everyone's laughing at him, he's doing the same thing, just looking at numbers all day," Howard explained.

"Oh, poor thing. I feel so bad for him," Penny said sadly.

"I wouldn't worry too much. He does say that the fact that he gets to go home to Alexis and Leah and you as his wife…He says that's more than enough to make everything worth it," Howard told her.

"Oh, my God, he is the sweetest man in the whole world," Penny said.

"Who is?" Leonard asked as he walked into the room carrying one baby per arm.

"Oh, my God, they're so cute!" Bernadette gushed, saving Penny from having to respond.

"I thought you guys might want to meet them," Leonard said as he handed Alexis to Penny.

"Can I hold one?" Bernadette requested. Leonard carefully handed Leah over to her. "Which one is this?"

"That's Leah," Leonard told her.

"How do you know that? They're not crying," Penny said.

"I pointed this out to your mom. Look at their eyes. Do you see how Alexis's eyes are a darker blue than Leah's?"

"No, I don't," Penny told him. "I am the worst. I can't even tell my children apart."

"Oh, I'm sure that's normal for parents of identical twins," Howard told her.

"No, it's not. I'm their mother. I should be able to tell the difference."

"Penny, don't be so hard on yourself. I'm a scientist; having a good eye for detail is part of the job," Leonard told her.

"Yeah, whatever." Penny handed Alexis to Leonard before she got off the couch. "Excuse me." She quickly made her way up the stairs.

"What was that about?" Amy wondered.

"I don't know," Leonard said, truly perplexed. "Amy, would you hold Alexis?"

"Of course," Amy said as she accepted the baby.

"Would you guys do me the biggest favor and watch them for a few minutes? I need to see what's up with Penny," Leonard said.

"We'd be happy to. Go talk to her," Bernadette said.

"Thank you." Leonard stood up and followed Penny up the stairs. He opened the door to their bedroom and saw Penny lying in bed staring at the ceiling. She didn't look at him when the door opened.

"Penny?" Leonard said quietly as he slowly approached the bed. He sat down beside her feet, but she still said nothing. "Penny, what's going on?"

"I can't do this, Leonard," Penny said, her hand covering her eyes.

"Can't do what?" Leonard asked.

"I can't do this. I can't be a mother."

"Penny, why would you say that?" Leonard asked.

"I love those girls more than I've ever loved anything. But at the same time, I hate myself for letting myself get pregnant."

"And why do you say that?"

"Because I'm not good enough for them!" Penny exclaimed. "Half the time, when they're crying, I start crying, too. My mom would step up and take care of them because I couldn't handle myself. Now she's gone, and you're not going to be around during the day, and I'm just going to completely fall apart, and then our children aren't going to be taken care of, and then I've failed!"

"Penny—"

"When I said yes to marrying you, newborn twins were never in the picture," Penny continued. "My entire life as it was and as I thought it would be is completely destroyed, and I feel myself hating Alexis and Leah for making that so, and then I hate myself because…There is no such thing as a good mother who hates her children." She was quiet for a minute, but her words were quickly replaced by tears.

"Penny…" Leonard said softly, unsure of the right thing to say.

"You're the father, and you're closer to the girls than I am!" Penny exclaimed as she cried. "I am their mother! They lived inside me for nine months! We're supposed to have this instant, magical bond, but not only do I not have it, half the time, I hate them!"

"Penny, life isn't always like what you see on TV and in magazines," Leonard said. "Yeah, sometimes moms make instant, magical bonds with their babies, but that's not always how it works, and it's perfectly normal. For a lot of people, it takes time. It doesn't make you a bad mother."

"It's never going to happen, Leonard. It's just not," Penny said so quietly, Leonard almost didn't hear her.

"It _will_, Penny. I promise. You just have to give it time," Leonard said.

"I just don't know how I'm going to sit here alone all day taking care of these girls that I absolutely _adore_ and can't stand at the same time," Penny told him.

"Well, I'll-I'll take more time off. I have a lot of vacation days. I'll be with you. I'll do whatever you want, need, anything."

"Oh, my God. How are you so sweet and adorable and kind and nice and perfect and I'm so horrible?" Penny said before her tears returned.

"I-I was trying to make you feel better, not cry again," Leonard said, now feeling guilty himself.

"I know, I'm sorry! You're trying to be such a good husband and I'm ruining it!"

"Penny…Okay, I'm definitely taking a few days off," Leonard declared. "I'm going to take care of the girls. You're going to go out to a spa or whatever you want. I'll handle everything."

"No! No, you can't do that!" Penny exclaimed. "You're already in hot water at work. Now you're applying for this new grant to find quantum…whatevers through a…something circuit. You have to work on that and do your job and make money so we don't end up homeless because I can't help!"

"You are helping! You're helping so much!" Leonard insisted.

"How? I'm not making any money. How am I helping?"

"You're helping by taking care of Alexis and Leah while I'm making money. I wouldn't be able to if you weren't doing that," Leonard told her. "I thought you said you weren't going to think like that anymore."

"I don't want to because logically, I know that you're right. But I still feel so guilty because I feel like I'm not contributing anything because I can't take care of these babies and I can't make any money. I can't do anything," Penny said miserably.

"Penny…Have you ever heard of postpartum depression?" Leonard asked delicately after a few minutes of silence.

"Partum means baby stuff, right?"

"I take that as a no," Leonard said. "It's a fairly common condition when women who have just given birth become very depressed."

"Why would they feel depressed if they just had a baby unless they couldn't take care of it like I can't?"

"It has nothing to do with whether they can take care of their children or not," Leonard told her. "After you give birth, a lot of different hormones get completely out of whack. That combined with sleep deprivation easily leads to depression. It's a chemical thing, _not_ an ability thing."

"And you think that's why I'm feeling this way?" Penny asked, her interest peaked.

"Well, I'm not a psychologist, but from the limited knowledge I have on it, I'd say it's a possibility," Leonard said. "You're not a bad mother. We've only been parents for a month, and I already can tell that you're a great mother."

"Why do you say that?" Penny asked.

"Because even though you're feeling this down and confused, you still take _great _care of Alexis and Leah, and you still want to love them. That's what a good mother does."

"You really believe that, don't you?" Penny asked.

"Of course I do. Stable brain chemicals or wild brain chemicals, it doesn't matter. You're perfect," Leonard told her. Penny looked at him for a moment, then sat up and kissed him, taking Leonard by surprise.

"I love you so freaking much," she told him when they separated. "For some reason, even when I'm bat shit crazy, you love me. I'm just…" Tears started to reemerge.

"You're just what?" Leonard asked.

"I'm just so lucky," Penny said tearfully. "I'm so lucky that despite how shy you are, you pursued me so diligently. I'm so lucky that you didn't let me go just because I was afraid of commitment. I'm so lucky that for reasons completely passing understanding, even though I've always been bat shit crazy, you've never given up on me."

"I meant what I said. I fell in love with you when I first saw you. You don't pass up the girl who for the first time, you have those kinds of feelings for, even if she's out of your league and sometimes doesn't even seem to want you. You don't let that girl go."

"Damn it, why can't I say things like that to show you how much I love you?" Penny asked.

"You don't need to. I know."

"How? I never say nice things like that. So how do you know?"

"Because you say things like that," Leonard told her. Penny smiled a little and wrapped her arms around him.

Deep down, Penny knew that no matter what was going on with her, it would all work itself out. She knew that no matter how crazy she got, Leonard would always stand by here. That alone was enough for her to feel like she could make it through anything.


	32. Chapter 32

Despite Penny's protests, Leonard did end up taking a few days off so he could watch the girls while Penny visited the psychologist her doctor recommended.

"I might be crazy, but I can still drive a car," Penny told Leonard as he pulled into the parking lot.

"First of all, you're not crazy. Second, I already explained this. I know you can drive, but I don't want you to feel like you have to drive home if you get upset during the session," Leonard said.

"Yeah, I know." Penny sighed as she looked into the backseat where Alexis and Leah were sitting in their car seats.

"You okay?" Leonard asked, stopping the car in front of the building.

"I just want to feel that unconditional, constant love for them more than I've ever wanted anything," Penny said.

"You will. I promise."

"I know." Penny turned to Leonard. "I love you."

"I love you, too. Now go get yourself straightened out."

"Okay." Penny kissed Leonard before she got out of the car and headed into the building. She found the psychologist's office and sat in the waiting room until she came to get her.

"Are you Penny?" the tall, redheaded woman asked. Penny nodded. "Nice to meet you, Penny. I'm Dr. Jackson. Come on back." Penny stood up and follow her back into her office. She settled on the couch while the Dr. Jackson sat down in a chair across from her.

"So Penny, what brings you here today?" Dr. Jackson asked.

"Well, a little over a month ago, I had twins. Now my husband, Leonard, thinks that I might have something called postpartum depression," Penny explained.

"What kind of emotions have you been feeling that led him to believe that?"

"Name any emotion, and I've probably felt it in the last month," Penny told her.

"Well, why don't we just go through one at a time?" Dr. Jackson suggested.

"Okay. I guess the first one that comes to mind would be…overwhelmed."

"What's making you feel overwhelmed?"

"Well, there's the amount of work and there's the lack of sleep and there's the fact that this was never supposed to happen in the first place and that this was never what I imagined my life would be like and this was never what I _wanted_ my life to be like and…It's just everything."

"So can I assume this was not a planned or desired pregnancy?"

"Neither of those, no," Penny said. "I was so pissed at myself for letting it happen, and I was dreading them coming, especially when I found out we were having two. And I don't know what it was about naming them, but once they had names, I started to get more excited about it. When they were born, I thought I was going to be totally ready…but apparently I wasn't."

"Why do you say you weren't ready?"

"If I had been ready to be a mother, I wouldn't be here, would I?"

"Not necessarily," Dr. Jackson said. "I would say that the fact that you've come to see me today suggests that you are quite probably ready to be a mother."

"What makes you say that?"

"Part of motherhood—a significant part—is about learning when it's time to surrender, when it's time to admit that maybe we can't handle everything on our own. When we realize that it's okay to ask for help. By coming to see me today, you've shown that you're ready to be a mother because you're ready to ask for help with being a mother. It shows that you care. That's the first step."

"But isn't that giving up?" Penny asked.

"I suppose you could view it that way. But sometimes, the act of giving up becomes a starting point. It gives you the opportunity to clear your head. It makes you realize that the thing you thought you would never do, say, or have to face becomes more than what you have to do. It becomes the way it is."

"So you're saying that I'm not really giving up. You're saying that I'm allowing myself to start fresh so I can realize that this is just the way life is now."

"So you can begin to adapt to it. Exactly right," Dr. Jackson said. "It's never easy to ask for help, Penny. By coming here today, you've overcome an incredible hurdle. You can be a mother. You just need to learn some coping strategies so you can handle everything a bit better."

"Okay. That would be good. So how does that happen?" Penny wondered.

"Well, before I attempt to provide you with coping strategies, I'll need to know more about how you've been feeling. Everyone experiences a different combination of symptoms of postpartum depression. By knowing which are affecting you, I can help you more," Dr. Jackson said. "First off, the most important question: have you ever had any thoughts of harming yourself?"

"No."

"Any thoughts of harming your twins?"

"No."

"Okay. That's good," Dr. Jackson said. "So besides feeling overwhelmed, tell me some other things you've been feeling."

"Guilty. Very, very guilty," Penny told her.

"Guilty about what?"

"A lot of things," Penny said. "I feel guilty that I'm not taking good enough care of Alexis and Leah. I feel guilty for making Leonard take time off work. I feel guilty for having to go back on my promise to Leonard."

"What promise was that?"

"I promised him before we got married that I would either keep working or go back to school," Penny began to explain. "I was going to go back to school and get some kind of degree and get a real job so I could actually contribute something to our marriage. Now because of these girls, I can't do that."

"I'll admit that I haven't met Leonard, but I can't imagine that he would give you any trouble about that now that you have twins," Dr. Jackson said.

"He wouldn't. I don't feel guilty because I would be disappointing Leonard. I feel guilty because I'm disappointing myself," Penny explained. "Leonard has a PhD and this great job, and I never finished community college. I was going to get a degree and I would be so proud of myself and Leonard would be so proud of me and I wouldn't feel like I'm not good enough for him quite as much. Now that can't happen because I have Alexis and Leah and I'll be living entirely off of Leonard's money. I never wanted that to happen."

"By taking care of Alexis and Leah, you are contributing a _tremendous _amount to your marriage. Making a contribution does not necessarily mean you're contributing money," Dr. Jackson told Penny.

"Yeah, that's basically what Leonard says," Penny said. "In my head, I know that he and you are right. But in my heart, I just can't stop feeling like I'm a horrible wife."

"And that's the depression talking," Dr. Jackson said. "I know how powerful that voice in your head can be, that voice that keeps putting all of these negative, poisonous thoughts in your mind. It's hard to get it to shut up. Very, very hard."

"It is. It really, really is," Penny said quietly. "That little voice hasn't been trying to tell me to hurt myself or anyone else. But it does keep pointing out all of the bad things about having these babies, and even bad things about Leonard. It kills me because I feel myself hating Alexis and Leah, and I can't even believe I'm saying this, but sometimes, I feel myself hating Leonard, too."

"What is that voice telling you that's making you resent Leonard?" Dr. Jackson wondered.

"Well, ever since Leonard brought up this whole postpartum depression thing, he's been extra, extra sweet to me. At first it was nice. Really nice. But then that _stupid_ little voice started telling me that he was being too overbearing, too intrusive, too worried, too nice. I've even found myself more than once wishing that I hadn't married him, which is, like, the stupidest, worst thing that could ever go through my mind and if he knew that I've been thinking that…he would be _so_ upset," Penny said, beginning to tear up. "I know people would probably think I should consider the fact that I'm hating my children worse than that I'm hating my husband. But to me, even though they're both really upsetting, I hate myself more when I start to wish I hadn't married Leonard than when I start to wish I hadn't had Alexis and Leah."

"Why do you think that is?"

"Because Leonard is the most amazing person in the world and no matter how crazy I am, he never let me go. He has always loved me and cared for me and respected me, no matter what," Penny told her. "Also because, I _don't_ regret marrying Leonard. Marrying Leonard was the best thing that's ever happened to me, and I hate having half of me thinking otherwise."

"What was the time gap between you marrying Leonard and giving birth?" Dr. Jackson asked.

"We found out I was pregnant a few weeks before we got married. Why?"

"You experienced two _extraordinarily_ life-altering events within a _very_ short amount of time. To me, it makes perfect sense that you're finding yourself resenting all three of them," Dr. Jackson said.

"But I _don't_ resent Leonard, I _love _him. It really upsets me that I feel myself hating him. That's why I really feel like a bad wife," Penny said, tears freely flowing now. "I just want to love Alexis and Leah, and I want to feel the way I know I feel about Leonard. I just want to be happy again. I don't know why it's this hard."

"Well, for most people, it isn't," Dr. Jackson said sympathetically.

"Then why is it so hard for me?"

"This is going to sound rather abstract, but bear with me," Dr. Jackson said. "There is a phenomenon some people experience—people who have lost an arm or a leg—called 'phantom limb.' They feel pain, heat, cold, even movement, despite the fact that—strictly and scientifically speaking—there is no 'there' there. It's as if the body can't accept that something so essential, so natural, has disappeared."

"Okay, this is getting like when Leonard talks about his job as a physicist; all I hear is 'blah, blah, blah'," Penny said dully.

"Allow me to get to the point," Dr. Jackson said. "What I'm trying to say is, much like a limb, your life as a single, childless woman was something that felt inherently natural to you. It was more than a lifestyle; it was a part of you. Do you agree?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"When you got married and had children, that part of yourself was amputated, to continue with the metaphor," Dr. Jackson said. "Despite the fact that it's been detached, and in spite of its clear and sudden absence, your connection with it is still lingering. I believe that you won't be able to fully connect to your new life and reality as a wife and mother unless you fully detach from your past persona."

"Okay, I liked you at first, but now you're starting to sound like what I was afraid a psychologist would sound like," Penny said.

"What's that?"

"My mother-in-law."

"Based on the venom in your voice, I feel it's safe to assume that that's not a good thing," Dr. Jackson said. Penny slowly shook her head. "I apologize, Penny."

"Just give me the Spark Notes version of what you just said," Penny requested.

"I think that the first step you need to take is to say a formal goodbye to the single woman you used to be. That's not your reality anymore. You need to disengage from it in order to begin to transition into your new role as a wife and mother," Dr. Jackson said.

"Okay. How do I do that?"

"The only person who can decide that is you," Dr. Jackson told Penny. "I suggest you talk to your husband. Tell him everything you've been feeling. See what he thinks would be fitting for you and him specifically."

"And then what?" Penny wondered.

"And then come back next week, tell me what you did, and we can go from there." Dr. Jackson stood up, signaling that the session was over. "It was nice to meet you, Penny. I promise I'll help you figure everything out."

"Okay. Nice to meet you." Penny found her way out of the building. Leonard was waiting in the car in front.

"How was it?" he asked once Penny was in the car as he drove away.

"I can't promise I'm going back," Penny told him honestly.

"What? Why not?"

"Because she talks like your mother."

"She can't be as bad as my mother."

"She's not _as _bad, but she's not good," Penny said. "I'll do what she suggested, and then I'll _think_ about going back."

"What did she suggest?" Leonard asked.

"She suggested that I find a way to 'disengage myself from my former persona.'"

"What's your former persona?"

"Single party girl."

"She didn't call you that."

"She might as well have."

"Penny, I'll be honest, I've never been the biggest believer in psychology, either," Leonard admitted.

"You're not?"

"No. My mom's brainwashing made me hate it, and being a hard scientist tends to make you question softer sciences like psychology."

"Again. All I hear is noise," Penny told him.

"Never mind. My point is, I understand if your first reaction is to think that it's dumb," Leonard said. "Here's the thing. Postpartum depression is a real thing that it sounds like Dr. Jackson thinks you have. Yes?"

"Yes," Penny confirmed.

"It's not something that goes away on it's own," Leonard continued. "You need to give the psychologist a chance, okay? We'll think of a way to formally say goodbye to your former life, and then you can go back and tell Dr. Jackson about it and how it made you feel. Will you do that?"

"For you, Leonard, I will do that."

"Well, thank you. But I don't want you to do it for me. I want you to do it for _you_," Leonard said firmly.

"Fine, Leonard. I will do it for me."

"Good." Leonard reached over the gear shifter and patted Penny's hand. "I love you."

"I love you, too. Like, more than life. You know that, right?" Penny asked.

"I definitely do. Don't worry about that," Leonard said. They spent the next few minutes in silence, Penny staring at him for the entire time.

"What are you thinking about?" he asked when he noticed her gaze.

"How I'm feeling totally out of my mind," Penny told him. "I don't know how much I believe in Dr. Jackson. But you know what I do have faith in?"

"What's that?"

"You," Penny told him, making Leonard smile. She didn't realize just how true it was until she had said it. Maybe she had her insane moments where she thought she hated him. But the one thing she never doubted was that Leonard would be forever understanding. It was the only thing in her life that she didn't have a single doubt about.


	33. Chapter 33

After much consideration, Leonard thought he had come up with a way to help Penny say goodbye to her life as a carefree single girl. Leaving the girls with Amy and Bernadette, he was ready to take her out for the night.

"I wish you would tell me where we're going," Penny said to Leonard from the passenger seat as he drove them through the streets of Pasadena.

"Didn't a wise woman once say, it's the not knowing that makes it fun?" Leonard replied.

"I only said that because I knew you wouldn't do anything I had planned because you're too scared of being bad," Penny told him.

"I will say that we will not be committing any acts of theft or vandalism tonight," Leonard said. "You want to talk or do you want to listen to the radio?"

"How long are we going to be in the car?" Penny wondered.

"It's a bit of a drive. But it'll be worth it. So? Talk or music?"

"Music," Penny decided as she turned on the radio. She sat back in her seat and listened to her favorite pop station. After an hour passed, Penny had managed to fall asleep. She woke up when she felt Leonard shaking her.

"Penny. Wake up," he said.

"Are we there yet?" she asked a bit groggily.

"Yeah, we're here."

"Good. Now where the hell are we?"

"Manhattan Beach."

"Manhattan Beach? You drove all the way from Pasadena to the beach?" Penny asked. Leonard nodded. "Okay. My next question would be, why?"

"Because you like the beach."

"Yeah, when it's daytime and the sun is out. Why would I want to go when it's dark?"

"Trust me," Leonard said as he got out of the car. Penny sighed, but followed him.

"Now what?" she asked.

"Now you come with me." Leonard took Penny's hand and led her from the parking lot down an empty pier. He sat down with her on a wooden bench near the end, facing the water and dark sky.

"You see that?" Leonard asked, pointing at a group stars.

"See what?" Penny asked.

"The constellation."

"All I see are a million little dots," Penny told him.

"Actually, the number is more like three hundred billion. Of course, not all are visible simultaneously, but…Never mind," Leonard said, cutting himself off when he saw Penny's glare. "It's Cassiopeia."

"It's a _what_?"

"Cassiopeia. She was the wife of Cepheus, the king of Ethiopia," Leonard said. "She made the mistake of bragging that she was more beautiful than the Nereids, even prettier than Juno. The other goddesses were insulted, so they complained to Neptune, the god of the sea."

"I thought Poseidon was the god of the sea," Penny said.

"Neptune is Poseidon's counterpart," Leonard explained, though based on Penny's expression, it made no more sense to her. "Cassiopeia and Cepheus were ordered by Neptune to sacrifice their daughter, Andromeda, as a punishment for her vanity."

"That's horrible. What kind of parents would do that?" Penny wondered.

"Well, thankfully, the hero Perseus arrived to kill the monster just before it devoured Andromeda, so, you know, all's well that ends well."

"Did you know all this on your own or did you look this up in an attempt to teach me something that's totally gone over my head?" Penny asked.

"No, I knew it."

"Does your brain have, like, unlimited capacity? 'Cause that's the only way I could imagine you could remember this pointless stuff in addition to the science stuff in addition to life stuff."

"I would say my brain's capacity is broader than the average," Leonard said as he looked at his watch.

"What, do you have a hot date?" Penny asked.

"Yes. She's sitting next to me."

"Oh, sweetie. That was so cheesy," Penny said, but Leonard didn't respond; he was too busy staring at his watch. "Okay, seriously, what's the time crunch? I doubt Amy and Bernadette are going to charge us overtime." Leonard kept his eyes towards his wrist. "Leonard, look at me."

"Wanna see a magic trick?" Leonard asked her after a few more seconds passed.

"You sound like Howard when he used to try to hit on me," Penny retorted.

"Trust me, it's cool."

"Okay, sure," Penny said.

"Look up," Leonard instructed, pointing at the starry sky.

"What am I looking at?" Penny asked as she did what he said. Leonard looked at his watch and silently counted down the final seconds.

The next thing Penny saw made he wonder if she was hallucinating. A shooting star streaked across the sky, leaving glimmery silver-golden traces where it had been.

"You're one hell of a magician, Leonard," Penny said, feeling as though the air in her lungs had been forcibly yanked out.

"Well, I have to keep you interested somehow," Leonard replied as they looked at the sky together, admiring the still lingering metallic streaks.

"Seriously. That was amazing," Penny said, turning to face him as the remnants of the shooting star began to disappear. "How did you know that was going to happen?"

"Part of the fun is not knowing," Leonard told her.

"You are going to keep using that against me, aren't you?" Penny asked. Leonard nodded. "Alright. Price I pay for using it on you." They were silent for a few minutes, then she turned to him again. "You said this was going to help me let go of my former life. I'm sure there's a point to this, but it's completely passing understand. Explain it to me?"

"Did you know that a shooting star has nothing to do with a star?" Leonard asked. Penny shook her head. "They're actually caused by bits of dust and rocks called meteoroids falling into Earth's atmosphere and burning up. That trail of light we just saw that the meteoroid produces is called a meteor. That's what a shooting star is, a meteor."

"Still not getting it," Penny told him.

"I haven't made my point yet," Leonard told her. "Meteoroids are a brilliant, beautiful phenomenon. They're an incredible thing to experience. But eventually, much more quickly than we'd like them to, they disappear. However, as they're burning up in the atmosphere, they transform into this magnificent new thing, a meteor. A shooting star. That transformation is the beautiful process that so many people wish to experience, but never have the opportunity to." Penny stared at Leonard, which he took as a sign of disapproval. "Do you still not get it? I'm sorry, maybe this was dumb. Maybe I shouldn't have tried to use something scientific to make my point. I know that just because it's easy for me to understand doesn't mean it's easy for you to understand. You know what? Forget it. Let's just—" Leonard's rambling was ended by Penny kissing him.

"I got it, Leonard," she told him when they separated.

"You did?" he asked, caught off guard.

"Mmm-hmm. And I think it's beautiful." Penny enveloped him in a big hug. "Thank you for showing me this, Leonard. It was one of the most amazing things I've ever seen, and it really makes your point."

"So has this been a sufficient way to say goodbye to single life?" Leonard asked.

"It's still weird to think that I have to give it up. But yeah. I think this is a pretty memorable goodbye. It's a starting place," Penny said.

"Good," Leonard said with a smile. He and Penny enjoyed the view and serenity for a bit longer, then he broke their comfortable silence "Alright. I hate to be the one to bring us back to reality, but we should probably go relieve Bernadette and Amy of their services."

"Yeah, you're right," Penny said as they stood up. They began to walk back to the car. "You know, I thought you were going to take me to a bar or something, let me have one more wild night."

"Oh. I guess that would have worked, too. Might have been a little less convoluted," Leonard said, the idea occurring to him for the first time.

"No, no. This was better. _Much_ better."

"Really?"

"Yeah. It might have been fun to have a night like that, but I think it just would have reminded me of how much has changed," Penny said. "I wouldn't be able to drink as much, I wouldn't be able to flirt with guys. This was way better than that."

"Why?" Leonard wondered.

"First, because it had true meaning to it," Penny told him. "Second—and most importantly—it's better because it came from you."

"I just hope I was able to help you," Leonard said.

"You did. You definitely did," Penny said as they got in the car. "Thank you again. This was the best night I've had in a long, _long_ time."

"My pleasure, Penny. Now let's get home."


	34. Chapter 34

Later that night, long after they had returned home, Penny laid awake in bed while Leonard slept beside her. She wanted to sleep, but something was keeping her up. She rolled over and sighed when she saw the big, red numbers of the digital clock telling her it was three in the morning; she knew she would be exhausted, and because she had convinced Leonard to go to work for the first time in three days, she was going to be on her own. She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to force herself into sleep. But it wasn't working.

After twenty minutes of staring at the ceiling, something—she didn't know what—compelled Penny to roll out of bed. She left the bedroom and walked down the hallway, stopping at the door to Alexis and Leah's room. She slowly cracked the door open and walked inside. Penny stood above the crib on the left side of the room and looked down at Alexis. The little girl was sleeping peacefully, her face softly illuminated by the nightlight.

As Penny looked at Alexis, something Leonard had said earlier that evening came to mind. He had told her that the process of meteoroids becoming meteors was something that so many people wanted to experience, but couldn't. It wasn't until she thought about it while looking at her own daughter that she realized exactly what he had meant.

Much like desiring to experience a shooting star, so many people wished to find "the one" and have children with that special person. But, like a shooting star, many of those people can't. Penny was able to find "the one." Penny was able to have not just one healthy child, but two. She realized that so many people would kill to have what she had. She was lucky.

Penny was taken out of her thoughts when she saw Alexis's eyes open. She expected her to start crying, but she didn't. Instead, after looking at Penny's face for a few moments, Alexis reached her arms out towards her mother. Penny was surprised; neither Alexis nor Leah had ever reacted to her like that before. Penny slowly leaned over and carefully picked Alexis up. Then, much to Penny's amazement and delight, Alexis smiled at her.

"Wow…" Penny breathed. When she saw her daughter smile, something seemed to click. This little girl was hers. Alexis wanted Penny's attention. She wanted her to hold her, love her. Alexis thought that Penny was good enough. Who was a better judge of whether she was a good mother than her own daughter?

"Penny?" she heard Leonard whisper as his footsteps padded down the hall. She was too busy looking at Alexis's still-smiling face to respond. She only looked over her shoulder at her husband when she heard the door open. She was so stunned from what she had just experienced, she couldn't even smile when she saw Leonard poke himself in the eye as he tried to put his glasses on.

"Is everything okay? I didn't hear the baby monitor," he said as he ventured further into the room.

"She wasn't crying," Penny told him.

"Then what made you come in?" Leonard wondered.

"Look, Leonard. Look. Alexis is smiling at me," Penny said, a big grin dominating her own face. "Look at her, Leonard. She's actually _smiling_."

"I see her. That's fantastic," Leonard said, smiling, too. "You know what else?"

"What?"

"You knew that was Alexis," Leonard pointed out. Penny's jaw dropped.

"Oh, my God. I did. I can tell them apart! I don't even know how I did it, but I did!" she squealed.

"I know. Congratulations," Leonard said, his smile growing as he saw Penny truly happy for the first time since she had given birth.

"Leonard, look at her! She's still smiling!" Penny's eyes begin to well up with tears.

"What's wrong?" Leonard asked anxiously, not wanting to see her joy go away so soon.

"Nothing's wrong. I just really, really happy." Penny quickly became overwhelmed. Leonard carefully removed Alexis from her arms and put her back in the crib before she burst into tears. She hugged Leonard as soon as his arms were free.

"Shh. It's okay, Penny. Everything's good," he told her.

"I know. I'm crying because for the first time in more than a month, I actually _believe_ that!" Penny exclaimed, burying her face in Leonard's shoulder. "She _smiled_ at me, Leonard. She _asked_ me to pick her up. She likes me!"

"Of course she likes you. She loves you. You're her mother. The best mother she could ever ask for," Leonard told her. Penny opened her mouth to reply, but Leah's soft cries interrupted her. "I'll get her."

"No. I want to," Penny said. She pulled away from Leonard and moved towards Leah's crib. With slightly shaking hands, she bent over and picked her up. Once she was in Penny's arms, Leah's cries began to quiet. "Oh, my God! Leonard! Did you see that?!"

"I saw it," Leonard's said.

"They've never done anything like this before. What do you think changed?" Penny wondered.

"I think you changed," Leonard told her. "I think they've always loved you. But I think they've always sensed apprehension whenever you tried to hold them. You don't seem so apprehensive now. You seem confident. I don't know what sparked this in you, but—"

"You did, numbnuts," Penny said with a loving smile as she carried Leah over to him.

"Really?" Leonard asked.

"Yes. It was what you said tonight."

"I-I said a lot of things tonight."

"You told me—in more science-y terms—that tons of people want to get married and have children, but can't. You made me realize that a lot of people would kill for what I have and I should be grateful. I really am lucky," Penny said. "Look at these girls, Leonard. And look at you. All three of you love me. All three of you think I'm good enough."

"Better than good enough. You're perfect," Leonard said. Penny smiled, then looked back down at Leah.

"She's beautiful, Leonard," Penny said, her voice in a near-whisper. "Look at these girls. Can you believe we made these tiny, little things?"

"Miracle of life," Leonard said a bit absently. He was too busy soaking in Penny's joy to really consider his own thoughts. "So do you think this has finally clicked with you?"

"Yeah. I actually do," Penny said. "How could it not click when they're asking me to hold them and smiling at me and immediately calming down in my arms? How could that not click?"

"I'm so happy for you, Penny. I'm thrilled you're finally starting to find that bond," Leonard said, smiling from ear to ear.

"I am, Leonard. I really, really am." Penny looked down and realized that Leah had not only calmed down, but had quickly fallen back asleep in her arms. "We should probably let them sleep."

"Probably," Leonard agreed.

"I don't want to let them go," Penny said.

"They'll be here when you wake up," Leonard assured her. Penny reluctantly put Leah back into her crib and went back to their room with Leonard. They climbed into bed together.

"Leonard?" Penny said.

"Yeah?"

"I can't thank you enough."

"For what?"

"For doing what you always do. Going after me again and again until I finally understand what's true."

"There was nothing I wanted more than for you to be happy and to experience the kind of love for Alexis and Leah that I've been experiencing," Leonard said.

"I think I finally am. And it's amazing," Penny said. "I don't want to keep you up. I just wanted to say thank you."

"You are more than welcome. I'll see you in the morning." Leonard tossed his glasses onto the nightstand and quickly fell back asleep. It took Penny a bit longer. Her heart was fluttering with love and pride and excitement; she started to wonder if she would ever sleep again. But finally, she drifted off, the smile remaining on her face.


	35. Chapter 35

Many months passed. During that time, Penny had managed to fully build a bond with Alexis and Leah that went deeper than she and Leonard ever imagined it would. She never wanted to leave their side and was thrilled that she didn't have to work so that was an option.

In the time between that momentous night full of stars and the girls' first birthday, Penny and Leonard finally figured out a routine that made handling twins and having time for themselves much easier. With it and a bit of lucky, the family had managed to make it to the twins' first birthday with everyone healthy and happy.

To celebrate Alexis and Leah turning one, Leonard and Penny decided to have all of their friends come over for dinner and cake. They all arrived almost simultaneously, eager to see the birthday girls.

"So how do you guys feel now that you've survived the first year with twins?" Bernadette asked as she held Alexis with Howard sitting next to her holding Leah.

"I feel like it can't get any harder than it was this last year," Penny told her.

"Wait until they're teenagers and they get minds of their own," Howard said. "What was the hardest part?"

"I'd say the whole postpartum depression fiasco," Penny said.

"I'd say lack of sleep, but even that looks pretty small in comparison to Penny's," Leonard said.

"What was it like being pregnant with twins?" Bernadette asked. Instead of answering, Penny took a good look at Bernadette's face; her jaw dropped. "What?"

"Oh, my God. You're pregnant," Penny declared.

"What makes you say that?" Amy asked.

"She's asking what it was like to be pregnant; that's not something she would be asking me a year after the babies were born. Plus, the incredible red hue to her face is kind of a clear giveaway," Penny said. Everyone turned to Bernadette, making her face turn even redder.

"Um…Surprise!" she said with a nervous smile.

"Wow, this is huge!" Leonard said. "Was this planned, or…?"

"Not exactly _planned_, but not…undesired, I guess," Bernadette told them. "I never saw myself as a mother. But then I saw the bond you and Penny made with Alexis and Leah, and I think we both realized that it was something we wanted. Howard and I decided we wouldn't use any protection and…see if it was meant to be. And apparently it was."

"Well, congratulations. This is great news." A realization struck Penny. "Wait. You didn't ask me what it's like to be pregnant with twins because _you're_ having twins, did you?"

"No, it's just one," Bernadette told her.

"But after seeing that lack of sleep from babies causes you to cut holes in walls, we are more than happy with one," Howard added.

"I thought we agreed to never speak of that," Leonard said. Howard nodded his agreement.

"Now we have two things to celebrate: Alexis and Leah's birthday and a new baby joining our group," Amy said.

"I'll get the cake," Penny said as she stood up and headed into the kitchen.

The group enjoyed their celebration and spending time together for a few hours before Raj, Amy, and Sheldon left. While Leonard was putting Alexis and Leah down for a nap with Howard so he could see how it's done, Bernadette and Penny were left alone together.

"Tell me the truth, Penny. Was being pregnant one of the worst things you've ever experienced?" Bernadette asked.

"It wasn't the most fun thing I've ever done, but remember that I had two," Penny told her. "It was after they were born where it was one of the worst things I've ever experienced. That depression was so strong. I hated Alexis, I hated Leah, I hated Leonard, I hated myself. That was really a horrible experience."

"I know it was. I'm worried about that," Bernadette admitted.

"I wouldn't be _too_ worried," Penny said. "Yes, it can happen to anyone, but it's more common when the pregnancy is unplanned and undesired. Your pregnancy is at least desired, right?"

"Surprisingly…yeah. It is," Bernadette said. "I never thought I wanted kids. But seeing you and Leonard with Alexis and Leah after you got through your depression…I don't know. That maternal instinct kicked in and it made me realize that maybe I could be a good mother."

"At least you believe that. But you have every reason to believe that," Penny said.

"So do you, Penny. You're a great mother."

"I know that now. But before, I was so unprepared to be a parent and so stunned by the situation. It takes adjustment," Penny said. "Wanna know something I've learned?"

"What's that?"

"No matter how we get there, we all eventually land on the road we're meant to travel," Penny said. "Even if it's nothing like the path you expected, you'll learn to trust it. And even though you have no idea where the hell it's going, you know that you'll never get lost. At least not for long. Because if it wasn't meant to be your path, you never would have landed on it. That's what I've learned."

"That makes a lot of sense. I hope it works out that way for me and Howard," Bernadette said.

"It will. Everything happens for a reason, even if the reason isn't clear. Plus, you have a huge advantage," Penny said.

"What's that?"

"You and Howard get to learn from all of the screw ups Leonard and I make with Alexis and Leah," Penny told her.

"There's a perk," Bernadette said with a smile.

"Seriously, if there's anything you need, Leonard and I are totally willing to help."

"Really?"

"Of course. You guys were so supportive when I was pregnant and after they were born and when I was going through depression. The least we could do is help you out when you need it," Penny told her.

"Well, thank you. We might have to take you up on that," Bernadette said. "So tell me the ins and outs of being pregnant." Penny began to offer up her earned knowledge, excited to have a friend who understood the beauties and pitfalls of having children.


End file.
